NGE: Walking in the Shadow of Dreams
by Gregg Landsman
Summary: Twelve years after a boy rejected Godhood, the man he became finds his life no less complex. The world is better, perhaps. And perhaps, he is happier. But, is it necessarily a safer world? And does he have a place in it?
1. Chapter 1

Neon Genesis Evangelion and all other properties in this fic are the property of their respective creators and owners. I own none of this – this is purely for practice and fun.

A little idea I was inspired to do by some other works I read and an idea I had running around the back of my head. Not strictly related to my other works.

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* * *

One light bulb blows out with a flash as she flips the switch, and she mutters to herself. Grunting in a decisively unlady-like way, she stumbles in, her feet sore and her shoulders stiff after a long, very very long day. Exhaustion escapes her as she drops her briefcase on the end table by the door, kicking the door shut as she files through her mail.

It is a nicely, fairly big apartment. The rooms are wide and the kitchen is open. The illusion of size is effective, intimidating. Anyone she invites in is impressed by the awesome scale she lives in, even more awesome when they realize _who_ she is.

The blue prints are framed, with a signature by the original designer, and it takes up an entire section of the wall by the couch. Pictures are everywhere. They mark the entrance to the door of her bedroom, on her kitchen counter, by her bedside night table. Everything reminding her of her past, as she walks through the past and, as she would have once said, 'strives boldly into the future.'

F___ that.

She opens the fridge, taking out an instant meal, popping it into the microwave. She doesn't even read the directions anymore. She lives off of it, she knows it by heart. Watching, waiting, she takes out the meal when she _knows_ it is ready, poking it with a fork as she kicks off her shoes and stumbles to the couch. Clicking on the remote, she eats, watching a news report.

"…_on the twelve year anniversary of the Battle of Tokyo-3, NERV Supreme Commander-_"

The channel changes as she curses, switching to a fashion show. Then switches to a sitcom. Empty jokes, empty laughs. Damn it, she's a professor. A professor of Theoretical Biology. She should be _happier_ than this. She knows why people are happy, and she could keep telling herself that she has everything she needs to be happy…

Except that she hasn't had a date in three years. Any relationship she's had lasts for days on average, weeks at least. She's never gone to third base, which if anyone who knew her back then knew, would _floor_ them.

Reaching into her suit jacket, she takes out her cell phone. A handful of names, all professional contacts who she says maybe a sentence to a day.

Rolling her head back, she closes her eyes and sighs. The mind wanders in these moments, and sometimes goes places it doesn't go normally. Walking to the kitchen, she dumps the rest of her dinner, snatching the phone from the charging stand in a smooth motion and walking to the couch.

Taking her laptop, she brings up her web browser, entering in a name and is rewarded with a phone number.

_Gott, how long has it been,_ she thinks.

Eight years, that rational, annoying part of her brain chimes back.

Hesitating for a moment, she starts dialing. Sure, it's long distance, but she doesn't mind. Doesn't care. He'll be happy, he'll be…

_Do you remember how it ended, last time?_

Her finger hovers over the last button. Of course she remembers. Last time they talked, face to face. Last time before _she_ ran away and _he_ stayed…but time heals all wounds, doesn't it?

Shakily, the last button presses down. Lifting the mobile handset to her ear, her stomach contorts. She blames crappy food more than anything, but doesn't think anything of it as the phone dials and _pick up Gott damn it…_

"_Hello?"_

The voice is the same, but different. A little deeper, more…confident, maybe? Chances are good it's him, isn't it?

_"Hello? Who's calling?"_

"Um…Shinji?"

"_…yes, this is Shinji Ikari speaking. Who's…oh, wait._"

It was him. Okay, that's good. That's step one. So he's there, even if he's stepped away for a moment, and if she can put more than two words together she can make a sentence and talk to him.

Even if the last time they talked she broke his nose.

"_Asuka, what is it?"_

Something catches in her throat. Her number's unlisted, after all. Maybe he recognized her voice? Maybe he remembered her? Maybe he-

"_Where's Mama?"_

"_Asuka, she'll be back soon. Please, I'm talking with someone on the phone. I'll be right over, okay?"_

Then a mumble, then footsteps, hurrying away as he clears his throat.

"_Sorry, kids,_" he sighs, "_Um…who is this?"_

She clicks off the phone. Silently, she sits on the couch, watching the sitcom. Empty jokes, empty laughs. She almost doesn't notice as the tears begin streaming down her face. Ten years, twelve years ago, she would have responded to this by screaming and hurling the phone into the television.

That was when her anger actually accomplished anything. Instead, the phone just drops to the floor, and after a long moment, her shoulders shake, and she holds her face in her hand as she cries.

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**Walking in the Shadow of Dreams:**

**Chapter 1: Meet n' Greet**

**-**

**-**

"Uncle Shinji? Who was that?"

Clicking the buttons on the side of the phone, Shinji Ikari shrugs. The phone number is unlisted, no name given. Sighing, he replaces the phone on the charger, looking down to the five year old, brown-haired girl.

"I…don't know."

The doorbell rings, the girl running off despite his protests and opening it, jumping into her mother's arms.

"Well, you're happy to see me," the young woman commented, as the girl playfully yanks on one of her pigtails, "I hope she hasn't been a hassle."

"She seems eager to get away from me," Shinji jokes, leaning on the counter, running a hand through longish black hair, "It's no problem, though I do question your timing. One would think our former Class Rep wouldn't be tardy."

"One would think our former class introvert wouldn't cause trouble," Hikari Suzuhara responds, "Well, we're going. You have that…thing…tomorrow?"

"God, yes," Shinji sighs, rubbing the bridge of his nose, "He's driving me _insane._"

Shrugging, Hikari nods.

"And you're still happy he's like this, now," she says, "We'll get going. Talk to you later?"

He nods, waving, she smiles as the door closes. Sighing, he looks up, leaning against the wall. He could swear he recognized the voice, but…_nah._ They made it plain to everyone around them that it was _over._ If she never even thought about him again, it would be too soon.

_And yet…_

Shaking his head, he turns, walking to the bathroom of his apartment. The day ahead looms. And he has deeds to do before then.

*

*

* * *

*

*

_"Go!"_

Clad in blue body armor, black face grill-masks, and white skirts falling to the floor, the two opponents draw their wooden swords and stare each other down. Around them in the gym, the other students of the kendo class watch, having seen this spectacle before. Some watch to learn. Others watch out of morbid fascination.

And as the younger of the two gives off an almost animalistic roar and charges, they realize it will be just as uncomfortable as the other times.

The younger man swings, in a downward chop to his opponent's head, which is easy blocked and returned with a slice towards the ribs. Grunting, the young man blocks, pushing off the swing and shoulder rushing the older man.

The older opponent sweeps out his legs, bringing the sword down in a vertical swing. The younger catches the sword, holding it in place with one hand, as he flips the other sword and drives it into the older man's crotch. The students around the dojo wince, some covering their crotches, as the sensei, an aged man in a loose white gi, sighs.

"This is why I insist on athletic protectors."

The younger man pushes off, rolling and climbing onto his feet.

"_Enough!_"

The two halt, swords going to ready stance. The sensei walks between them, pointing to the door.

"Cool off. Outside," he says, "Enough for today."

They turn to the sensei and bow, stumbling out of the dojo and into the simple, well lit hallway. The younger leans against the wall, pulling at the straps of his mask. Shinji eases off the face protector, sliding down the wall and resting his sweaty head against the cool tile.

"This is your idea of family counseling?" he asks.

The older man takes off the protector, revealing an aging face with graying brown hair and beard, reaching into a pocket and taking out his tinted glasses.

"You're the one who keeps going for my groin."

"And you keep trying to hit me when I'm down!"

They go silent, for a long moment…and Shinji chuckles.

"I'd like you to work for me," Gendo Ikari says, folding his arms, "For NERV."

"Unit 01 hasn't as much as turned on for twelve years," Shinji responds, "We both know I can't pilot anymore."

He sighs, looking at his father through splayed fingers. Sure, they've both aged. Sure, Shinji is slowly but surely physically becoming him, but right now, as his father stands ramrod straight and _looks_ at him, he sees the old Bastard again.

"But of course, you already know that," he says, "It _is_ your private kingdom."

"This isn't a piloting job," Gendo continues, "I _have_ several pilots, and more than one of them doesn't second guess my actions. Out of the lot of you, I think only Rei and Nagisa didn't talk back to me."

"Rei worshipped the ground you walked on and Kaworu was an Angel sent to _kill us all._ That doesn't _count._"

"I think I liked it more when you were terrified of me."

Muttering swears to himself, Shinji rises with a groan. At twenty six, his body doesn't bounce back like it used to, but at the same time he's sure most twenty six year olds haven't wrangled physical gods. Standing up, he steps forward. The same height as his face, the same facial structure with just a hint of his mother's smoothness, and he narrows his eyes.

"Alright," he says, "I'll work for you. No agenda. No games."

"No plots," Gendo says, raising his hand, "No agendas. No scenarios. I have a position that is well suited for you. It's for…the best."

"You mean it's what she wants."

Gendo nods.

The elder Ikari turns and heads towards the locker room, effectively ending the conversation. And leaning against the wall, he looks up and sighs, wondering what exactly his father had just gotten him into.

*

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* * *

*

*

To call Tokyo-3 'odd' would be along the same lines as calling a Tsunami a 'wave.' The Fortress City, rebuilt after the disastrous events at the end of the First Angel War, has a character. A character which attracts a population, going from a hundred thousand at the height of the War to two million in modern times.

Following the utter failure of Instrumentality, small little details were added. NERV, being a scientific as well as military organization, had to improvise and also study as many details as possible. Nothing was thrown away.

It for these reasons that the centerpiece of Tokyo-3(a)- and the home base of NERV following the sacking of the Geofront- was the hollowed out, rebuilt corpse of the Angel Ramiel. The massive blue diamond is set on a frame of supports, the hole that it received its kill-shot through upgrades to a massive search light, with elevators and ramps leading into the structure.

Windows dot the surface, planes and VTOL craft coming in and out, as a single figure moves unattended and unnoticed through the crowds of beige-uniformed individuals.

She would stand out if they paid attention. Blue hair, alabaster skin, and piercing red eyes. Instead, the sight of her has become so mundane that even an albino Nephilem holds little interest, considering the sum and whole of NERV's day to day experience. Elevator doors open, and the twenty six year old albino woman stands stock still as they close.

"Dogma," she says.

*

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* * *

*

*

"I can't believe you talked me into this."

"As do I. Considering our history, I thought you would just stop listening to me after some point."

The collar of the beige uniform itches at his neck, and Shinji can't help but glare at his father as they walk down the halls of the top level of the NERV Decahedron. His father is in his uniform; black and red, one glove white, the other, his prosthetic, black. A whir and click comes from his right hand as he flexes his fingers and they enter his office, his second waiting.

The years have been kind to Misato Katsuragi, and there is still the hint of an exuberant smile on her face as she spots Shinji, before she corrects it and clasps her hands behind her.

"Commander," she says.

The office is well lit- _her_ insistence, after all. The windows are unshaded and the desk is a crescent moon constructed from Ramiel's own material.

"Allow me to present our new Special Inspector," Commander Ikari says, "He will be working with the Tactical Operations department as our liaison with the JSSDF. Do you have any questions?"

Not waiting for a reply, Commander Ikari walks to his desk, sitting in his chair and tapping buttons. Holographic displays light up, information and pictures displaying in quick order as he tents his hands underneath his nose.

"Dr. Ibuki has settled in at NERV-3 at MIT," Misato says, "However, without a head of Project E here, we are operating at a disadvantage. Many Type orange readings have been coming from the Pacific, but the MAGI is fuzzy as to whether or not they are Pattern Blues."

"Understood. I have found a candidate to replace Doctor Akagi and sent an offer," Gendo responds, "Inspector."

Shinji stands up straight.

"You will meet with the possible candidate. A VTOL is waiting for you. Coordinate with the Tactical Ops commander on readiness of all Evangelions and take notes for your meeting."

"How many do we have?" Shinji asks.

"Unit 00, Unit 03, 06, 07 and 11 are at sortie ready status. In fact, she should be here right now…"

The doors open. Walking with a grace that is neither natural nor forced, dressed in a darker gray version of the normal female uniform, the blue haired, pale woman takes up a position next to Shinji. She regards him with a cool, steady stare before turning back to the Commander.

"A new head of Project E is chosen?" Rei Ayanami asks.

"Correct," Gendo says.

Beneath his hands, he smiles, faintly. In front of him are possibly the three reasons there is even a human race anymore. Rei, in betraying him, finally learned the value of her own humanity, something he in his negligence never taught him. Her own mind, sharpened to a point, he had to put to use otherwise.

Misato Katsuragi he underestimated at every turn, choosing her both out of pity for his role in her father's death and because he believed she could be easily controlled. He was wrong; her own maternal instincts, her own will, proved to be more than his cold, emotionless scenario could handle. When Kozou retired, he made her his second. If anything, she proved to be far too dangerous to be allowed to roam free.

And then there is Shinji. His son, even if he never referred to him as such. As much him as he is Yui. As dangerous as he could ever be, as willful and powerful as Gendo ever imagined. When they ask him how Third Impact failed, he boiled it down to two sentences;

Shinji became God.

And then he decided it wasn't for him.

"Dismissed."

*

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* * *

*

*

"You have been given Mr. Kaji's position. It has been vacant since his death."

Walking through the halls towards the lift bays, Shinji nods. Next to him, Rei speaks. Unlike others, he managed to not lose track of her, even after everything. Even after he was told _what_ Rei was, he couldn't simply shun her, only help her. Of course, Shinji's own lack of family, especially his relationship with his father, made this all the more important. Some see her as an abomination.

He sees a kindred spirit. Maybe even a sister.

"You will be taking on all of his duties?"

"Only official ones," he says, "No spying. I don't intend to be a triple agent."

"I see."

"I don't intend on sleeping with Misato, either."

She raises an eyebrow, inclining her head at him.

"It would make more sense to involve yourself with Tactical Ops commander," she says, "Katsuragi is, after all, now Sub Commander."

Narrowing an eye, he stares at her.

"Except that the Tactical Ops commander's my half-sister."

She smiles. A small, thin, humorous smile.

"Incest is like a board game. It is fun for the whole family."

In the years he's known her, he can still never tell when she's kidding or not. She leans in and pecks him on the cheek.

"It is good to see you back here," she says, "I hope it is better than the last time."

Turning on her heel, she walks away. As she clears the corner, he palms his face, groaning. Quickly walking, he heads to the lift, the clear glass box closing as it accelerates towards the top launch bays. Floors clear, eventually taking him through the central, hollowed cavity of Ramiel, where he finally sees it.

Face like a mythological demon, the great horn on its snout. Covered in purple and green armor, eyes dull and yellow. For a moment, he wonders if Evangelion 01 still lives like it did, still watches him. It has been twelve years since he stood inside it. Twelve years since he saved the world.

Every moment he was in it caused pain. A lifetime, he will spend making the wrongs involved in the mere _creation_ of that weapon right. It will work for no one, and maybe not even for him, anymore. Not since he knew the truth, and knew what horrors its creators intended him to unleash.

It is the most painful thing for a child to let go of their mother. It is even more painful to realize your mother is a monster.

Shuddering back the nausea, he puts it back in his mind, forcing the revulsion down as he walks towards the waiting VTOL as the lift doors open.

*

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* * *

*

*

The closest Shinji ever went to leaving the country was when he was onboard an aircraft carrier in the Pacific. He slept during the six hour flight. He read a book, checked his email, and waited, and finally came to a conclusion.

_They didn't tell me who the candidate was._

They didn't. No name, just a location. An offer had been made, forwarded, not accepted yet. And despite the fact that this offer was made maybe a couple of days ago, his father was _insistent_ that Shinji go and personally recruit this person.

Palming his face, he swears. Thankfully, he's the only one here, so no one notices in the private aircraft. Leaning back in his seat, he closes his eyes as the craft lowers to the ground, wondering what game his father is playing this time.

No games, he said. No agendas.

He's not sure what's worse. That his father promised that, or that Shinji _believed_ him.

"Inspector, sir?"

He looks up, finding a Section 2 agent standing over him.

"Ready to go?"

*

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* * *

*

*

Trading his beige uniform for a suit with a pin marking him as NERV personnel, he is driven to the area. Narrowing his eyes, he sees the archway of the University of Halle-Wittenberg as the car pulls under it, watching old and new architecture of the German University as the car rolls by.

They park in one of the public lots, the bodyguard trailing behind him. Finding a faculty building, in specific the one on the location he was given, he begins ascending steps, walking into the lobby, presenting his ID. Climbing stairs, he follows the numbers until he finds himself in a well lit, balcony hallway on the fourth floor, following room numbers until he is in front of the right one.

Room 404, Faculty Office.

Squinting, as if that would somehow magically allow him to understand German, he sighs and knocks, hard.

No answer. He knocks again.

"_Ja, ja! _I'm coming!"

His hand stops in mid-knock. Stepping back slightly, arm falling to his side, his eyes go wide. He knows that voice. He _knows_ that voice.

"Father, you _son of a bitch._"

The door swings open, Shinji locking eyes with a pair of aqua blue eyes. A still beautiful face, light skin, framed by long red hair now tied in a sensible, loose ponytail. Dressed in a brown dress suit and yellow button shift, red pen in hand and glasses on her nose, she stares at him as well for a long moment.

"Hi," he manages to choke out.

A single, silent moment hangs between them, eight years of baggage seemingly dissolving for a moment. He moves to close the distance, opening his mouth to explain why he is here, what he wants, and why she should listen.

But instead, Shinji Ikari, Special Inspector to NERV, drops to the floor after Professor Asuka Sohryu Langely's fist connects to his jaw, and the door to her office slams shut with a flurry of teutonic swears.

"Perhaps I came at a bad time…?"


	2. Far from the Tree

_Author's note: Yes, the inspiration for the opening came from Jimmy Wolk's __Price of Fame__. The rest, on the other hand, is based on an idea I've had kicking around in my head for a few years._

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_

"Special Inspector Ikari has reported that the candidate for the Project E position has not accepted as of yet."

Looking up from a stack of finance reports in the NERV cafeteria, Misato Katsuragi raises an eyebrow as she stares at Rei.

"Okay," she says, "Why?"

"Currently, he is nursing ice on his jaw."

She sits up. Realization comes to her in a brief, blinding moment when the gravity of the situation hits her. Closing the folder, she purses her lips and motions for the albino girl, her immediate subordinate, to sit down.

"Rei," she says, "Who _is_ the candidate?"

*

* * *

*

He picked himself up, walked out of the building, and left the university. He then promptly found the most expensive hotel in walking distance and charged a suite to his NERV expense account. If Father wants to play, he's also going to pay, and since part of his role is having an unlimited account, he's going to enjoy it.

Picking at a room service cheese platter more expensive than his monthly utility bill, Shinji Ikari leans back on the plush, brushed leather sofa. Staring out the treated full-wall windows at the greater Berlin area, he thinks. This is not going to be easy. The mission he's been given is his first, and if he wants to show that he was chosen for the Special Inspector role for some undefined skill set and _not_ because his father is trying to score brownie points with his mother, he has to accomplish it.

So, the plan must have three outcomes:

First, talk with Asuka Langley Sohryu, Professor of Theoretical Genetics, without her decking him.

Second, convince her to return with him to Tokyo-3, a place with many unpleasant memories for the both of them, to head Project E.

Third, get in Unit 01 and make his father beg for death.

In that order.

The question is, of course, how. He can not approach her. Too much was said back then that cannot be easily unsaid. Both of them have changed…well, _he's_ changed, and from what he can see her punching technique has gotten better. Instead, he has to find a way around the gulf between them.

Sitting back, he chews the inside of his cheek. That's the key, he thinks, as he nibbles on a piece of cheese he can't pronounce the name of. That's _exactly_ what to do.

Staring out the window, a small smile slowly creeps along his face. Wheels begin turning in the back corners of his mind, and he picks up the phone.

"Directory assistance, please."

* * *

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**Chapter 2: Far from the Tree**

**-**

**-**

* * *

It was found coming in towards Tokyo-3 from the Pacific. It resembled a massive, metallic moth, and considering it was showing up as Pattern Orange and not Blue, it was quickly classified as a Kaiju instead of an Angel. As such, there was a level of debate between who was best qualified to handle it before NERV was given the go ahead, and Unit 07 was deployed.

Two hundred feet tall, covered in blue armor with red highlights, shoulder jet strips containing its main melee weapons, it sports a three-eyed face and a long, extended chin, giving it the appearance of someone in silent contemplation of their lot in life. It ascended from the lifts just outside of Tokyo-3, took a spear as big as it, and promptly impaled the monster before pinning it to the verdant fields outside of the city.

In Central Dogma, a domed raised platform covered in floating screens, the technicians at the main consoles at the middle level read off power fluctuations from the Evangelion and the Kaiju.

"Target is silent," one of them declares.

Standing at the platform raised above them, Rei nods.

"Recall the Evangelion," she says, "JSSDF will take over cleanup."

Turning on her heel, she walks across Central Dogma into an access hallway, finding someone waiting for her.

"Commander."

"Excellent work, Rei," Gendo Ikari says, face unreadable as always.

"You made it a point that I had tactical knowledge," she responds, "I have put it to good use."

He nods.

"Let's have lunch."

She nods, walking beside him as they enter a lift.

"You have chosen the Second Child as the head of Project E."

"She does not have that designation any more," Ikari responds, "You retain the title of First Child due to your ability to still pilot Unit 00."

She nods, again.

"I originally believed you requested her as a way to placate Ikari-Sensei's wish for grand children," Rei continues, "Despite the lack of cordial relations between her and Shinji. I simply believed you were either unable to recognize their problems, or unwilling to question Ikari-Sensei."

He narrows his eyes, frowning.

"Not holding back, are you?"

"No," she continues, "However, I retain my clearance in the MAGI and have dug deeper into Sohryu's records. I see why you want her in Tokyo-3."

"She is as brilliant as her mother, although as temperamental."

"No."

She turns to him. Her face is unreadable but he swears he sees a small twitch on her lips.

"Do you intend to repeat your mistake?" she asks.

"Do you believe I intend to?"

She considers his reply for long moments, as the lift begins slowing down. The doors open, and he walks out, ending the conversation. She considers pursuing for a moment, before tapping a button for her office.

Lunch will have to wait.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Kicking off her shoes and dropping her bag, she walks into her apartment. The slamming of her front door echoes as she clenches and unclenches her fists all the way to the kitchen, looking through her refrigerator before grabbing a beer and taking it to the couch.

"Stupid," she says to herself, leaning back, "Stupid, stupid, stupid."

He hand is still a little sore. He doesn't have a glass jaw anymore, that's for certain. It was supposed to be a normal day. She cleaned herself up after last night, got herself nice and hammered, and slept it off. Her class- given, several students there are older than her- was progressing towards the point where they will start asking her about the research of the great Kyoko Zeppelin Sohryu, one of the progenitors of Evangelion technology, or the Divine Technology as it is called in some circles.

Much like her mother is known in some circles as a crazy bitch who hung herself after her experiment went wrong. Who left herself for her little daughter to find swinging from a light fixture.

In her frustration, in her anger, whether accurate or misplaced, she never stopped to ask herself the important questions behind his sudden appearance. _What was he doing there?_ Instead, it was instinct.

Lying down, the beer forgotten, she reminisces. She swallowed her pride after that last argument, boarded and plane and came home. It hasn't been easy. She's on speaking terms with her family, yes, but it was that last discovery that cemented her place here. The realization that she was _needed_ and-

Phone rings. Reaching for it blindly, she grabs her cell phone from her jacket and stares at the number. Smiling, she opens it and brings it up to her ear.

"Hello?"

A voice replies. Cheerful, happy, glad to hear her voice if nothing else.

"No, no," she sighs, "I'm fine. I've just had a long day is all. How are you?"

She listens, a skill she picked up by need and experience. Sitting up, legs folded underneath, she nods, laughing softly as little details are explained to her with enthusiasm and pride.

"That's great. That really is. No, no, I just like that you're having fun. I'll see you next week…okay. Put her on, then."

The voices change. Her stepsister, Marie, possibly her only real friend in her homeland, takes the phone.

"It's just been a long day. Don't worry about…wait, _WHAT?!_"

She narrows her eyes, before rolling them and lying back down.

"You _promised_ you wouldn't do this anymore. I'm not interested. We both have better things to do with _my_ time than send me out on blind dates and…really? Okay, if you say he's cute, I guess he is and…he wants to meet me _where?_"

The name of the single most expensive restaurant in downtown Berlin is read off to her, and she raises an eyebrow. _Interesting,_ she thinks. Sitting up, rolling her shoulders, she hears the details, nodding as she commits them to memory.

"Marie, that's two hours…alright. Alright, you win. You _owe_ me for this…right. Bye."

Standing up, she shrugs off her jacket, hanging it on a chair by the entrance to the kitchen. Starting to unbutton her blouse, she walks to the bedroom. She has a date tonight, and if she messes _this_ one up like she has _every single date,_ she's going to hear about it from her entire extended family. On the other hand, it's the perfect thing to get her mind off her current troubles.

"Stupid," she says.

For the life of her, she can't tell who she's talking about; him, or her.

*

*

* * *

*

*

On short notice, the best she could find way a black, thick strapped dress that goes down to her ankles and doesn't show off too much leg, paired with a pair of gloves that go almost to her shoulders. The material was shiny, classy, and she wore it to her sister's wedding three years ago. Thankfully, she still fits in it, and still fills it out well. Not bad for a glorified bridesmaid dress (even if Marie insisted that Asuka show off some cleavage. Odd girl) and a shawl. Still, she wishes she had more time for this, but it was either go through her closet for a few hours or shower, and she chose to be clean rather than pretty.

Adjusting the bust line of her dress and making sure she has something on display, but not enough to give it away for free, she enters the waiting area of the restaurant. She's never been in _here,_ only seen it from the outside. Chandeliers made of crystal reflect light over the crushed velvet carpets and white clothed tables, the scent of food she cannot name making her mouth water.

Businessmen, the rare film stars she can name, and millionaires mill about the waiting area, none paying attention to her. Of course, she could announce _who_ she is, and then they'd be falling all over her, but…no.

No.

She's put that behind her, she thinks, as she looks at the full wall aquarium, spotting rare specimens from her studies, including one she was sure was extinct, before she clears her throat and approaches the desk of the Maître 'd, a short, distinguished man with a thin mustache and a disapproving glare. He looks over her and narrows his eyes…and nods, a small tinge of recognition.

"Yes. He is already here."

He snaps his fingers, a waiter her age appearing. He nods to her, and gesturing into the dining area, leads her in. Holding her purse tightly, she lets her eyes wander. At one table, she sees the president of the university dining with a student a few years younger than her, at another she sees the Chancellor and his wife. Waiters and busboys flit about with mechanical precision, and her stomach growls in an undignified fashion from its steady diet of instant and pre-made meals as she takes in the scent of a perfectly prepared filet mignon.

"Your table, Miss."

She nods, turning to the two person table, ready to face whatever nameless, and in this case rich fan that her sister has set her up with, shrugging off her shawl as she plasters on her best, winning smile.

At the table, Shinji gives off a small, almost mocking wave, and the smile disappears.

Slowly, shakily, she sits down across from him. He continues smiling as she glares at him, closing his menu as the waiter approaches.

"We'll have two of the most expensive items on the menu," he says, ignoring her gaze, "And also, if I could have your wine list…wait, no. Just bring us a bottle of your most expensive…red? White?"

He turns to her.

"Is red good? Okay."

He turns back to the waiter.

"We'll take a bottle of your most expensive red wine, to."

The waiter nods, mumbling something along the lines of 'very good, sir,' and walking away with the menus. The fabric of the arm rests starts to creek under Asuka's gloved nails as she narrows her eyes and her breathing slows.

"You look nice," he says.

"What are you _doing?_" she whispers.

"Ordering dinner," Shinji says, taking a breadstick, carefully avoiding the candle between them, "This place was recommended by my father. And before you ask, this is all going on my NERV expense account."

She grinds her teeth before leaning back in her chair, rubbing the bridge of her nose before pushing her glasses back up.

"What do you want?"

"To be in a place with witnesses so you can't hit me," he responds, tenting his fingers in front of him as he leans back, relaxed.

She notices it, to. She notices the confidence behind his smile, the ease of it. Eight years, she thinks, and _this_ is what he's become. It's with more than a little discomfort that she remembers who he's reminding her of.

"You didn't come from Japan to ask me on a date, did you?"

"The last time I tried asking you out, you broke my nose," he responds, "So, no. I'm working for NERV."

"You said you couldn't pilot anymore," she responds, as the wine bottle and it's ice-filled holder is deposited next to them, two glasses placed in front of them and filled, "What are you doing for them?"

There is none of the mocking. None of the derisiveness that marked their previous interactions. He sips his wine, nodding in thanks to the waiter.

"I'm the Special Inspector to NERV-1," he says, "Have you checked your e-mail, lately?"

"Not lately, no."

Shinji nods, sighing. Leaning forward, he tents his hands, a habit he's picked up, and keeps himself looking respectable while doing so by not staring at Asuka's cleavage.

"My father wants you to take Dr. Akagi's old position," he says, "And head Project E."

She stares at him as he finishes. He waits, sitting back, as she taps her fingers on the table.

And then she grabs her wine glass and drains the contents in one gulp. Slamming the glass down, her cheeks flush red and she blinks, pointing to the bottle.

"More."

*

*

* * *

*

*

The computer screen beeps, and Gendo Ikari looks up from the reports littering his desk to stare at the message. Sighing, he realizes that it is late, possibly close to midnight, and he has been here since at least eight in the morning. Of course, this is old hat for him. Even past his negative personality traits, it is acknowledged that he is a hard worker.

NERV's role has changed. Following the first Angel War there were others, and now even non-Angelic monsters dotting the landscape. Perhaps it is _her_ doing, allowing him to finally bond with his son through necessity. But still, his task is his own. That he may be doing this job without ulterior motives…

Well, that would be unthinkable.

He taps at his keyboard, replying to the message. A greeting.

_What do you think you're doing?_ The messenger replies.

"Replacing a retired scientist," he responds.

_Right. Sure you are. Are you telling him the real reason?_

"He'll figure it out on his own."

*

*

* * *

*

*

There is no logical reason a German twice-graduate college student should have this little tolerance for alcohol. She's singing some sort of Germanic folk diddy, leaning on him, hanging on him as they stumble into the lobby of the hotel. He waves to the desk people, well aware that his hand around her waist could be reason for a beating if she sobers up at some point, but he doesn't have an alternative.

He has no idea where she lives, and at this point he's lucky if she remembers her last name, and he's not getting an answer from her sister's phone. Thankfully, the hotel room is quite big and has a couch he can sleep on. It doesn't help that he's feeling tipsy, to.

It's close to midnight, and they stumble into the elevator, hitting the button for his floor. After the job proposal, she said she'd think about it. They talked, really _talked._ She's calmed down in the past eight years, but he can't see why, can't see if it's for good. Maybe she calmed down because she finally got over whatever ghosts were haunting her, or maybe she calmed down because life came around and knocked her off her pedestal. Either way, it's jarring, seeing her like this. Not as loud, not as mean. Not as…_hello._

"Asuka, why is your hand in my pocket?"

Eyes half lidded, the red haired girl giggles, lips fluttering as she clumsily moves against him.

He really shouldn't expect a lucid reply at this point. She downed half the bottle during their dinner and nearly fell out of her seat at one point. He doubts he'll take her out to _that_ restaurant again.

Her other hand drapes over his shoulder, before she pouts, pulling her hand out of his pocket and lazily tracing it up his shirt.

"Y're notta wimp anymore, 're yuu," she drawls, twisting the corner of her lip up, "Ain't so scrwny n'more, to."

She leans forward, licking her lips, standing on her toes. Pressing herself against him, and pressing his back to the glass wall of the elevator, she sloppily, messily kisses him. To put it in perspective, that one, badly done kiss from twelve years ago is not the only one he had. Yes, there was that one with Misato during the JSSDF invasion, which neither of them _ever_ talked about again, and there was also his relationship with Rei before he found out that it basically summed up as an Oedipus Complex gone hilariously wrong. But, having gone through college, Shinji has had relationships. Not all of them lasted very long. Most of them ended the moment they asked to meet his father.

Still, Asuka is not the only girl he's ever kissed…although, right now, it doesn't matter. She's kissing him. She's sticking her tongue down his throat and pinning him to the wall. Her breath tastes like the berries they mixed into the wine and walnut salad, and instinctively, he takes her head in his hands and returns it. They barely hear the 'ding' of the elevator doors, both of them stumbling out. They hop, skip, fall in a controlled manner across the hallway to the door he unlocks with his key card, before he kicks the door shut and slams her back against the door.

Her shawl and his jacket drop to the floor, her purse tossed across the entrance of the hotel room, knocking over an end table as her pumps and one of his shoes end up bouncing off the window.

It hits him, soon enough. The gravity of his situation. He and she are both drunk. Wait, no. He's tipsy. She's _drunk off her ass._ He's about to score with her and fulfill twelve years of pent up frustration and fantasies.

And in the morning, she's going to _murder him._

That enough sobers him, and he grabs her wrists, pulling them off his belt and pinning them to the door. She struggles, lips twisting in frustration, looking at him with bleary eyes.

"No," he whispers, "No, we can't do this."

He pulls her from the door, steadily helping her walk. The headache is already throbbing in the back of his skull as he leads her into the bedroom, her face blank, unreadable. A contact lens has fallen out of her left eye, the blue replaced by a deep, crimson red. Slowly, gently, he clicks on the light. The bedroom has everything he would need. A wall-mounted television, a king sized bed with rafters, a full window panorama and plush carpets for at least one of his now-bare feet.

He sits her on the bed, pulling off her gloves. He sees the angry white scar running up her right arm, from between her middle and third fingers and all the way up to her shoulder. He helps take off her necklace and glasses, putting them on the night table as he lays her down…and hears a soft, heavy breathing.

"I'll be on the couch," he says, pulling the covers over her, "Call me if you need me."

He walks out, clicking off the light and closing the door. Curling into a ball, she balls her fists by her face, her eyes clenching shut, her lips trembling as droplets of water fall on the pillow.

"Dsn't wnt _me_," she chokes, "N'one wnts _me…_"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Third Impact was averted twelve years ago when, at the heart of Instrumentality, Shinji Ikari spotted his father and decided he had enough of old Gendo's bullshit. So, charging across the infinite expanse of the Reality of the Soul, he tackled him and they began kicking, cursing, punching, and biting each other.

Which is when _she_ showed up.

Few things are more satisfying than watching your father getting punted by your mother, especially when you hate the former and idolize the latter.

Of course, it then went downhill when Yui Ikari seized her son by the ear and told him that _he_ isn't getting off easy, either, and _here's what we're going to do about your behavior, young man-_

*

*

* * *

*

*

Rubbing sleep, his vision clears and Shinji sits up on the couch. It's a good thing he went for the premium rooms, otherwise he'd be sleeping on a floor. The couch is comfortable, actually. Sure, it doesn't fold out into a bed or anything, but it's soft enough and the throw pillows were good enough for him. The sun wakes him up, and it's too damn early at the same time, as he rises and looks around and remembers he doesn't have any food in the kitchen, so he can't cook.

Looks like another job for Father's company expense account.

Clicking the phone, he waits.

"Room service? Two orders of scrambled eggs, some juice, and coffee. Thanks."

The door creeks open as he places the phone down, and heavy, clumsy footsteps stumble out of the main bedroom. Stumbling speeds up and the door to the bathroom shuts, Shinji rolling his head back as Asuka refunds last night's dinner with gusto. Water runs, gargling, and spit, and the door swings open. Her hair is disheveled, and her eyes are puffy and red. She didn't really put on any makeup the night before, or else there would have been the tell-tale sign of streaked mascara.

As it is, she pulls the strap of her dress back up her shoulder, blinking at the natural light filtering in through the windows.

"How're you feeling?" he asks.

"F___ you," she responds.

He only smiles in response.

"Not a morning person," he says, not asks, "I think you overdid it with the wine."

"No, really," she mutters, leaning against the wall and groaning, "Well, everything's where it should be, so I can _conclude_ you didn't take advantage of me in my drunken state. So I guess I can thank you for overcoming your base masculine nature."

"That's what I like," he says, leaning back on the couch, "Your graduate degree lets you insult me with advanced words, now."

"Again, F___ you."

She moans, rubbing her temples as she walks to the kitchen and begins chugging water. He watches her, handed tented. The motion of her shoulders as she chokes down the water, her pulling her hair back as she mutters. Closing his eyes, he lies back on the couch, draping one leg over the back as he stares at the painting covering the ceiling.

"I'll take the job," she says, "I'll have my sister ship everything over. Just let me get home and change, okay?"

"There's a private aircraft from NERV," he says, "They'll go whenever you're ready."

She mutters an agreement, grabbing her bag, gathering up her shoes and shawl. Muttering to herself, cursing to herself, she rifles through her bag and finally drops it, slumping onto the couch and rubbing her left eye. He sits up, reaching over to-

Well, whatever he intended to do, she smacks away his hand.

"Don't," she says, "Just…just _don't._ I can't find my contact and I look like a _freak._ Bad enough with this…"

She holds up her right arm, and finally slumps her shoulders. She grits her teeth, her hair falling in front of her face, before she takes a deep breath and releases.

"I have to wear long sleeves every day," she says, "I have _one_ contact in one eye, and whatever happened _f___ed_ up my vision so badly that I need glasses. If I ever want to end a blind date my sister puts me on, I just roll up my sleeve and watch them run for the hills."

He nods, watching her. The four years after the end, she'd end these rants about her changes by hitting him, belittling him, yelling and screaming and wrecking the apartment while cursing. The vibrant, beautiful, exotic foreigner, reduced to a circus side show because of her last stand. A last stand which, in her opinion, did all of jack and shit to stop the Impact. Noooo, she'd rant, it was the Invincible Third Child who saved the world, once again.

But now she goes silent. Now she just stares at the scar on her hand, as if there are answers there. He is about to say something, maybe even roll up his sleeve to show her where the Lances from the MP Evas penetrated his wrists.

Then the doorbell rings.

"Room service," he says.

*

*

* * *

*

*

"The candidate will be here tomorrow," Gendo Ikari says, hands tented in front of his face as Katsuragi nods, "Doctor Sohryu will take over the duties of head of Project E. Our mission goals with the Evangelion technology will as of now advance towards new uses of the Evangelions."

"Since we have the only working Evas, we're trying to find a use for them?"

"Correct, Katsuragi," he responds, as Rei walks in, "Rei you will greet Inspector Ikari and Doctor Sohryu. Your opinion on Doctor Sohryu?"

"Upon my last meeting with her eight years ago, she had yet to overcome her past traumas to the degree Inspector Ikari has," Rei responds, "However, as you have selected her, you believe she will be more capable as a researcher than a pilot."

Ikari nods, handing them both a folder.

"NERV keeps track of its assets," he says, "We will do everything we can to make sure that Doctor Sohryu's tenure with us is…comfortable. For her…"

Misato's eyes go wide, and she looks up from the folder and glares at Gendo.

"And her daughter."


	3. Man I used to Be

Staring at the stump, he marvels at how clean it is. No mark of severing is on. No bruises or scars. The stump is smooth, incredibly smooth. No hair grows on it, yet he can feel the sensation when he touches it. It is a marvel of medical science, and Gendo Ikari _is_ a scientist. When Adam was taken from him at Third Impact, so was his hand, but it was taken in both a physical and metaphysical way.

Taking his prosthetic from the charging station in his simple, brown tiled bathroom, he places the wrist upon his. There is a spark, and a small tremor of pain crosses his face as the artificial nervous system connects with his, and the fingers move in perfect synchronization to his commands.

"Right," he says, "Let's begin."

-

-

**Chapter 3: Man I used to Be**

-

-

She took a cabin in the airplane and stayed there for the entire trip. He would have wanted to talk. No longer as antisocial as he was those years ago, he also wouldn't have minded discussing last night with her. Then again, it's probably for the best. Starting a conversation with a reminder that she got hammered and tried to put her hand down his pants isn't the best way to break the ice.

Instead, he worked. Catching up with operations he needs to be aware of, he spent the trip alternating between napping and looking at data and projects. His father has been busy, and it shows with the research he's authorized.

The trip was boring. There, he said it. It was boring. Seven hours of reading and studying, and while he considers himself bright, at one point he wanted to ask his father if he was kidding when he gave him this job.

"Sohryu."

"Wondergirl."

At the exit ramp, Shinji rolls his eyes as the old tension returns. Asuka and Rei stare at each other, and for some reason Asuka's especially intent on Rei. He'd ask her why, but, of course, she seems to be the most social when she's plastered and he doesn't have any alcohol on him. Rei turns from her and smiles in his direction, before she turns on her heel and back into the base.

Walking down the ramp of the VTOL, he walks into the conversation between Asuka and Misato, their former guardian talking, a genuine smile on her face. It is welcoming to see that, Shinji considers, especially considering how badly everyone parted. Asuka is tight lipped on details, though, not letting much out, not responding to little jabs to get her to respond.

"Doctor Sohryu."

They turn and snap at attention. In fact, everyone in the hangar does, including the pilots, technicians, even other passengers. Gendo Ikari has entered the hangar, adjusting his black jacket as he stops in front of them.

"Welcome back, Doctor," he says.

"Thank you, Commander," Asuka responds, inclining her head.

Gendo stares at her for a long moment, and nods.

"Good," he says, and turns, "I will let you get settled and have pertinent information forwarded to you. Agent Ikari will be your liaison to my office."

He nods to Shinji, and walks out. Sighing, Shinji checks his watch, rocking on his heels as he walks to the exit. Walking through the halls of NERV, hands in his pockets, he mulls over the situation. At least they won't be living together. If they did, it would awkward, awkward to say the least. She has changed, changed very much. There are walls around her now, worse than before.

After her outburst, she was silent, even through breakfast, before quickly excusing herself to head home and change. Nothing about the night before, nothing about why she took the job. He never thought there would be a day where Rei would be chatty compared to someone…and he notices her standing in the lift as he enters.

"Congratulations," she says.

"Thanks, I think," he says, "Your impressions on Asuka?"

Rei tilts her head, pursing her lips.

"I am curious what effect motherhood has had on her personality."

The lift doors close as Shinji spins to face her.

*

*

* * *

*

*

It takes him two hours to get home. Jet lag and travel fatigue catch up to him as he deposits his suitcase in the living room and stumbles into the bedroom, flipping onto the bed as the wooden frame creeks. One thing he learned from his time as a room mate is that, yes, a _real_ bed is _very nice._

Hands folded behind his head, he takes a deep breath and relaxes. Slowly, happily, he drifts off to sleep, and-

_WHAM._

_ "Scheisse!_"

Opening his eyes, he sits up. He had to have imagined that. There is no possible way he heard that. Stress has to be why, and especially with last night he's probably imagining her everywhere-

_WHUMP._

_ "Gott Verdammt!"_

He pulls his pillow over his face, hitting it, hard, twice before he accepts his fate. Sliding off the bed, he slides on his shoes as he walks through his well lived, yellow painted living room, grabbing his keys off the kitchen counter as he walks out his front door.

His apartment is in the same building as the apartment he lived in when he first came here. As such, that means it empties onto a hallway with a railing, past which is the rest of Tokyo-3. Three stories up, Shinji looks to his side to find his next door apartment, previously empty, now has an occupant.

Hands in his pockets, he walks over, peaking his head in. There is a chest. A wooden, massive, rectangular chest, in the middle of the living room. It is open, and there piles of clothes, and the remains of a coffee table underneath it.

That, and oblivious to his presence, is the owner, sorting out clothes and tossing them in piles on the living room's couch.

"Packing lighter?"

She whirls, narrowing her eyes at him. Rolling her eyes, she tosses aside the handful she was holding, hands on her hips as she regards him coolly.

"Are you stalking me, now?" she asks.

"Nope," he responds, leaning on the doorway, "I'm your neighbor."

Shoulders slumping, she mutters something in German, glaring at him. Muttering something about perversion and jerks, she continues making piles, a small mound of shoes rising beside the couch. Many of the clothes, he notices, are not adult clothes. Many of them seem to belong to a child; pink, frilly, and small.

"So," he says, "What's her name?"

"Who's, Third?"

"Your daughter's."

She looks up from the pile. He knows better than to ask to help, her expression tells him all the response he _would_ get. It was enough that she tolerated him doing her laundry. Then again, he's probably going to be doing that once she settles in, to.

"Ariel," she responds, "Ariel Zeppelin Sohryu."

He nods, grinning.

"Why didn't you mention her yesterday?" he asks.

"Why didn't you mention little Asuka?" she says, "Honestly, I thought I burned more than enough bridges when I left."

"Huh."

Shinji shrugs, smiling.

"When did you talk to Hikari?"

She darts up, eyes wide at the mention of the name. His smile vanishes, recognizing the shift in the air, standing up straight as she grabs a nearby pair of pumps and hurls them at him. Yelping, he ducks, realizing too late it was a distraction before she grabs him by the shirt and pushes him out.

"What the _hell_ are you-"

"_OUT!"_ she screams, and slams the door. Right in his face. Collapsing onto his back, he yells in pain, grabbing the right side of his face. Groaning, he lies for a few moments, listening to her screaming in German from the other side of the door.

"Yep," he groans, "Just like old times."

*

*

* * *

*

*

"What do you mean, _you haven't talked to her?_"

Holding the icepack over his swollen right eye, feet up on his coffee table, Shinji rolls his eyes as he listens to Hikari Suzuhara explain that, _no,_ she was not aware that their mutual source of exasperation was back in town, and _no,_ she had not spoken to her recently. This is followed by Touji, her husband and definite father of the two children, asking if he can come over and knock some sense into the Demon, which is followed by him being whacked in the head with a rolled up newspaper.

"Well, the problem is, I mentioned that you named your daughter after her and she _went ballistic! _I'm just wondering about the _whys_, here!"

Another long explanation which he half listens to, running a hand through his hair.

"We both know that she got an unlisted phone number and never forwarded her address. So she was never told. We both know you wanted her at your wedding. So I need you to speak with her before…my father has me as an intermediary between him and her. I'd rather not have her chase me with a blunt instrument every time I forward a question to her…yeah, okay. Okay. Bye."

Turning off the phone, he flips it in his hand and with a frustrated grunt, tosses it across the living room. Leaning back on the couch, he glares at the spotted white ceiling, as if today was it's fault.

The door knocks.

"Go away."

It knocks again, louder. He knows who it is. He doesn't care.

"I'm not home!"

Sighing, he climbs to his feet, stumbling to the door and opening it. Holding the ice pack close to his face, as if the scene of pity will aid him, he glares at Asuka with his non swollen eye.

"What do you _want?_" he demands.

"Start from the beginning," she says, hands on her hips, "Who's…"

"Touji and Hikari's youngest daughter," he responds, "I babysit for them when they're busy…wait a minute."

Removing the ice pack, he folds his arms, narrowing his eye.

"I just got off the phone with her," he says, "You haven't talked with them. They have no idea you're even in Tokyo-3."

Turning with a grunt, he walks away from her as her mouth drops open, muttering to himself as he slams the icepack on his counter, staring at her.

"That was _you,_ wasn't it? _You_ called me and hung up!"

"Well, I…"

Mouth opening and closing wordlessly, she stares at him. Rarely does one score a victory over her like this, and rarely is one out of striking distance when they do so. Rubbing the bridge of his nose, Shinji shakes his head and groans, walking to his fridge and taking out a soda.

"Is that it?" he asks, "You thought I had a _daughter?_ That's why you've been so…pissy at me?"

He swears to himself, softly, staring at the can. Sighing, he leans on the counter, biting his lip as she stands, stock still, frozen in place as he shakes his head and laughs. The laugh is bitter. Hollow. He closes his eyes and lets off a ragged, aching breath.

"Why in God's name would I even have kids in the first place?" he asks, "After what my father put me through? After what my _mother did?_ You honestly think I could raise a child with _them_ as my role model?"

He turns back to her. Her arms are folded, her eyes clenched shut. She says nothing for a long, silent moment, before she starts turning back to her apartment.

"I," she stammers, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't…"

He doesn't reply, just nods.

"My stepsister is flying in with my daughter tomorrow," she says, "Can you help me pick her up?"

He nods. Silently, she turns, walking to her apartment, disappearing behind the door. He doesn't say anything, doesn't move, for some time. Until finally, painfully slowly, he closes the apartment door and shuffles off to the bedroom.

*

*

* * *

*

*

The sun shines, the birds are chirping, and Gendo Ikari looks up from his office desk the next morning as the door to his office swings open and Shinji walks in. Hands tented in front of his face, an eyebrow nonetheless rises when he sees the bruise covering his right eye.

"I see things are back to normal," he says, "Will you be moving back in with Katsuragi, as well?"

"Is there a reason you never told me Asuka has a daughter?" Shinji asks, stopping in front of the desk and leaning on it, "Or for that matter, who your candidate was?"

"Yes."

"Are you going to tell me?"

"No."

Groaning, Shinji hands his head as his father returns to his work.

"I think I liked it better when you were intimidating."

"To a fourteen year old I'm terrifying," Gendo responds, "My reasons for not telling you everything were my own and justified. Considering your past history with Doctor Sohryu, she would not have consented to return if you were straightforward. Is there anything else?"

Shinji nods, narrowing his eyes as he faces his father.

"I know about you playing Doctor with Dr. Akagi," he says, "But I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt that you've changed over the past twelve years."

Gendo looks up at him, nodding.

"And?"

"Touch Asuka and Unit 01 will _touch you."_

The two Ikaris stare at each other. Hands tented in front of his face, there is a small, almost invisible twitch on the corner of his mouth, before his sits up and pushes his glasses up his nose.

"Dismissed."

"Sir."

Shinji turns on his heel and walks out of the office, swinging the door open and coming face to face with Rei. She examines his face, examines the bruise, and narrows her eyes. Contemplating, brow furrowed, she turns and walks to the lifts.

*

*

* * *

*

*

She begins the next day. As it is, she is mostly unpacked. The smaller room by her bedroom is set up, with the single bed, stocked dresser, and the monitor tucked away beside the bed, with the receiver by her night table. She can hear everything that happens, everything that goes on.

Closing her eyes and sighing, Asuka leans in the doorway of what soon will be her daughter's room. Yes, it's difficult, taking her away from her cousins, her friends. Tokyo-3 doesn't hold many good memories…but, if she does it right this time around, it may be home to some new ones. Closing her eyes, swaying with some invisible tune, she pushes off the doorway as the door knocks and walks to it.

Opening it, she comes face to face and locks her gaze on a pair of red eyes.

"Sohryu," Rei says.

"Wondergirl," Asuka says, and walks away, into her kitchen, "What do I owe this _honor_ to?"

"You have injured Shinji," Rei says, "It is not appreciated."

Asuka mutters under her breath, leaning on the counter.

"That? He deserved it," she responds, "Don't worry yourself."

"Stop tormenting my brother," Rei says, narrowing her eyes, "It is not appreciated."

Asuka stares at the albino girl, narrowing her eyes…and laughs. She leans on the counter, laughing, running a hand through her hair before pushing off of it. Grabbing her purse from the couch, she swings it over her shoulder, adjusting the collar of her long sleeved blouse.

"And here I thought you were doing something no one ordered you to," she says with a smirk, "Nice try. I'm heading to my office."

She moves to the door…only to find Rei's hand gripping her shoulder.

"Stop tormenting my brother," Rei says, brow furrowing as her face knots with a rare anger, "You kraut bitch."

*

*

* * *

*

*

The thing is terrifying. Two hundred feet tall, black armor with green highlights. Its face is like a pug, or a short snouted Dragon, in a constant angry grimace as it stares at him. Shinji folds his arms as he stares at the knotted brow and yellow eyes of Evangelion 03, reconstructed over the years, veteran of many Kaiju battles. Destroyer of worlds, destroyer of lives.

"Admiring my ride?"

The servos in his arm and leg whir and click, faintly. You have to know what to listen for as he walks, and Shinji does. He still blames himself for them, after all.

"I was thinking of adding decals. You know, red tail fins by it's ass, maybe a nice speaker system. And get this: under chassis _lights._ Thing is, only place to put those lights would be it's _balls._"

Touji Suzuhara has grown up well. Three inches taller than Shinji, thin and muscular, a virtual brick wall in his black and green plugsuit. Not to mention, he is the Senior Pilot, and outside of Rei has the most clocked hours in an Evangelion.

An Evangelion he's nicknamed Bart, after the Angel that at one point possessed it, and according to Touji still talks to him every now and then.

"So, the Red Devil's your neighbor, now?" he asks.

"Yeah," Shinji says with a sigh, "In the past two days she's punched me twice, thrown a high heel at my head, and thinks I fathered one of your children."

"Pretty sure you didn't," Touji responds, leaning on the railing next to Shinji, "Hikari can't keep a secret, and neither can you. How the Hell did she manage to have a kid?"

Shinji stares at him.

"Again, can't keep a secret," Touji responds.

"Dunno," Shinji sighs, leaning on the rail, "I'll have to ask her. Whether or not I can _get_ an answer out of her's something else entirely. I just hope she and Rei don't have any problems."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I mean, Asuka really didn't like Rei, remember?" Shinji slumps his shoulders, looking at the Eva, glaring at it. "But they're all grown up now. So I don't think I have to worry about any cat fights."

*

*

* * *

*

*

"_What._ Did you. Just. _Call._ Me?"

Rei narrows her eyes, absently staring at the face in front of her. A face with a pronounced snarl and a good amount of fire behind her eyes, even if one is artificially colored. A pale hand releases a shoulder, as Rei stands taller in her beige jacket and black skirt, and stands on her tip toes to get right _in her face._

"I called you a kraut," Rei explains, "As that is the generally accepted ethnic slur for a person of German descent. As your actions towards Shinji are contradictory at best, and sociopathic at worst, I found it appropriate to refer to you as a bitch."

Personality does not change much after the teenage years. Having known her for several of those years, Rei had built up a psychological profile of Asuka Langely Sohryu, complete with a list of psychosis and trigger terms which could be used if she ever had to goad her. It is with a smile that Rei realizes it works, and her plan comes to fruition.

Asuka catches Rei with a right hook across the face, sending her stumbling back. Wiping blood from her lip, Rei smiles.

"Very well. Let us begin."

The punch sends Asuka flying across the living room, over the coffee table and into the wall. Sliding down, she groans, bracing on her hands as Rei daintily, happily walks towards her, hopping onto the coffee table and walking across it.

"When Instrumentality was reversed," Rei explains, "Everyone returned exactly as they were before their end. As did I."

Her eyes glow, faintly, as she hangs in the air for a moment before landing in front of Asuka.

"I am Adam. I am Lilith."

She bends down, face inches from Asuka.

"And you are _screwed."_

A kick to Rei's face sends her stumbling back, and for a moment, the tactical ops commander for NERV-1 has realized she has miscalculated. With a yell, Asuka punches her in the stomach, pushing her back before running onto the coffee table and leaping off, tackling Rei and sending them both down to the living room floor.

Unpacked clothes goes flying, a black leather pump tossed hard enough to embed in the ceiling, Asuka straddling Rei to deliver a punch to the face. Red eyes glow and Asuka's sent flying into the air, over the couch and landing on her back on the wood floor with a groan.

"We do not have to continue this," Rei says, walking onto and hopping over the couch, "Simply tell me you will not do physical harm to my brother, and explore your feelings in a constructive fashion."

She walks to Asuka, as the red head stands up with a groan, supported by a chair. Blood is pooling on her lip, her left eye sporting a bruise, the collar of her shirt ripped and her hose now showing a pronounced run on her right leg.

"Is that acceptable?"

"Ah…no."

Asuka swings the chair into Rei's head, breaking it on her as Rei stumbles to the side. The albino girl steadies herself, raising an eyebrow as Asuka breaks the back of the chair on her knee, sporting two impromptu batons.

"I believe I will have to beat a better personality into you," Rei says, cracking her knuckles.

"Bring it, Wondergirl," Asuka snarls, "I'll take you apart so slowly you'll think it's your _career!_"

They charge…and stop, spasming before they both drop to the ground. Standing in the entrance and surveying the damage, Misato Katsuragi sighs, and turns off the two tasers.

"Crap like this is why I don't let pilots live with me anymore."

*

*

* * *

*

*

Hands tented in front of his face, lights in the office dimmed and the sun behind him, Gendo Ikari surveys the situation before him as he did in days of old. Neither of them are looking directly at him.

Rei has a pronounced bruise over much of the left side of her face and is holding her right arm, several cuts on her lip and a long, thin cut on her right cheek.

Asuka has several bruises and a black eye, her collar torn and the her lip cut. Some dried blood is caked around her nose, and her hair is frazzled like steel wool.

"I'm waiting," Ikari says.

Neither responds. Glaring at the two of them, the Commander of NERV continues.

"I am waiting for an explanation. An explanation that will explain to me how my Tactical Operations Officer,"

Glaring at Rei.

"And the head of Section One,"

Glaring at Asuka.

"Managed to get into a…as Sub Commander Katsuragi put it…_cat fight_ for reasons neither have deigned to reveal."

"It was my fault."

It was not that either of them said anything. It was not that either was willing to throw themselves on the sword to save the other. It was that they both took credit and blame at the same time.

"I misinterpreted the relationship between Doctor Sohryu and Inspector Ikari," Rei says, "I baited Doctor Sohryu to attack me."

"I accidentally hit Inspector Ikari with my front door," Asuka says, "I blew off Rei when she expressed her concerns."

"I see," Gendo says, narrowing his eyes, "I expected such behavior. Twelve years ago. Either you, Doctor Sohryu, have not matured in the past decade, or you have become _less_ mature than you were at fourteen, Rei. Either way, NERV will _not_ condone such actions again."

The doors to the office swing open.

"Dismissed."

They stand, walking silently out the doors. A lift door at the end of the blue crystal hallway opens, Shinji walking out…and freezing when he sees them. His mouth opens and closes as he tries to find the words. Eventually, he settles on the obvious one.

"What the _hell?_"

"Don't ask," Rei says, walking past him and into the lift.

Shifting from foot to foot, Asuka avoids his gaze, trying to spot something interesting in the hallway to stare at, but soon realizes that it is the hallway outside of Commander Ikari's office. Therefore, it is drab, lifeless, and boring, and she has no choice but to face Shinji.

"Rei and I got into an argument," she says, "We fought. Misato won."

"I imagine," Shinji says, looking her over, "After you beat the crap out of me when we were seventeen, she started carrying tasers just for you."

She sighs, shoulders slumping. Fixing her collar, she sees that the rips are only at the edges and hardly noticeable, and the run in her hose isn't as bad as she feared.

"I'm still presentable," she says, "Can we go? I don't want to be late."

He nods, then looks at her, narrowing his eyes.

"Yeah, your contact fell out," he says.

Popping a mirror from her purse, she stares at her face and her lips curl into a frown. As he said, her left eye is now deep, crimson red, and once again she hasn't brought a spare with her. She curses, slamming the mirror shut, running a hand through her hair…and stops when his hand cups her chin. He stares at her, raising an eyebrow, his expression thoughtful, probing.

"What…what are you doing," she asks.

"I like it," he says, "Makes you look…what's the word?"

"Freakish?"

"Exotic?"

She raises an eyebrow as he reaches into her purse and puts her glasses on her nose, stepping back. She smiles, shakily, unsteadily. As if she needs to smile but was unsure if she could until a second ago.

"Eight years ago you'd flinch if I came within a foot of you."

"I'm not the man I used to be, Asuka," he says, "It took me a while. It really did. We've all changed."

"I'm sure some of us remained the same."

He smiles. The smile is warm, happy. A smile she only saw a handful of times during their younger years, but now she sees almost constantly. The smile of someone who has what he wants in life…

Or has an idea how to get it.

"I think your daughter is waiting," he says.

He offers his hand. She takes it with a smile.

"Let's."

*

*

* * *

*

*

Clicking the video feed to the hallway off, Gendo Ikari tents his hands in front of his face and grins. A video screen clicks into existence in front of him, displaying records and a picture. A child much resembling Doctor Sohryu when she was five, listing her name, physical dimensions, and a list of information that would only make sense to a handful of people in the world.

Also listed, and only cleared for his eyes and above, is the identity of her biological father.

The screen shifts, becoming a facility deep underground, underneath the base, deep in the remains of the Geofront. It is a holding facility, dedicate towards the maintenance of the remains of those weapons destroyed in the First Angel War. And the centerpiece of that collection is the mangled remains of a red armored, green highlighted Evangelion, two of its four eyes shattered, and its Core only recently started to send any signals.

"Let's begin."


	4. Motherhood

Marie Oliviarte-Sohryu is the child of a rather successful widowed doctor who married the widower of a sadly deceased patient. While never getting along strictly well with her stepfather and particularly having a heated relationship with her step sister, who was also quite a bit more famous in addition to being something of a firebrand. That changed some eight years ago when Asuka returned to Germany and arrived on their doorstep. That was a long night, filled with forgiveness, explanations, and a good amount of overdue bonding between sisters.

Of course, Mother took it as quite a shock when it was explained that the widower's first wife as not _quite_ dead and instead the primal spirit occupying a 200' tall weapon of mass destruction that sacrificed itself to save Asuka, and Mr. Sohryu himself didn't look that happy either.

They bonded in their contempt of their parents, if nothing else. Years passed as Asuka returned to college, got her PhD in record time and took a position. Marie named Asuka her Maid of Honor at her wedding six years ago, and the godmother of her children, of which two are here and quite a few more are planned.

Her husband, Saul, is watching over her prides and joys as she escorts Asuka's own, the small bundle of energy bouncing along with her as they walk down the entrance ramp to Tokyo-3 international airport. The hustle and bustle of the dozens of people walking through the glass covered ramp lessens as it empties out, and there is indeed a welcoming committee.

A bruised, battered, and somewhat bleeding welcoming committee.

-

-

**Chapter 3: Motherhood**

-

-

Nursing a drink at the bar closest to the Ramiel-turned-base, Rei Ayanami fumes silently. She always does this sort of thing silently, after all. She is just a silent type of person who prefers to not call attention, as if she did she would most likely also call attention to the fact that she is not entirely human.

But recently, she has come to a startling conclusion, of which she only told in confidence Sub Commander Katsuragi. Which prompted her to stare at her and ask the heavens why she decided to stop drinking.

Rei Ayanami wants babies.

Babies. Babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies.

The part of her that is Lilith, mother of Mankind, has been working overtime, and that part wants babies. _Babies._

Perhaps that is the reason for her recent spat of aggressive behavior. In her earlier days, Sohryu was her rival. She attracted Ikari-kun's attention, and that has become more obvious since Ikari-kun's realization that she is his half sister. Besides which, Sohryu has a child, although to most but the two of them, it is obvious she would not mind having Ikari-kun's children.

Then again, neither would Rei. Of course, there is the incest issue. Lilith does not seem to mind. The part of her that is Lilith keeps telling her to tie Ikari-kun to the nearest flat object and make babies.

Babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies.

It also tells her that, compared with the crimes against God Yui Ikari committed, shaking your brother's willow tree is pretty tame. Perhaps, Rei thinks, as she sips the drink, sitting at a table in the corner of the bar, that is why she provoked Sohryu. She wanted to either make her admit her attraction and end the guessing game, or maim her so she could have Ikari-kun all to herself.

And make babies.

"Ayanami? Rei?"

Looking up, she narrows her eyes before recognizing the person in front of her table. Not very tall, but well tanned, blonde hair sun bleached and glasses having seen better days. She smiles, faintly, in recognition, as the young man sits down across from her with beer in hand.

"Kensuke Aida," she says, "You have not been in Tokyo-3 in some time."

He smiles. Widely, teeth separated slightly, as he takes off his worn hat and places it next to his drink. He is dressed in a leather jacket, a white buttoned shirt and worn, dirt crusted genes. Jeans. There is stubble on his chin, but not as if he is trying to grow a beard. The stubble is more that of a man too busy to shave.

"I've been around," he says, nursing the beer, "I keep an apartment here to live in when I'm not out."

"You are a film maker," she says.

"Nature documentaries, mainly," he says, pressing the bottle against his forehead, "I've been around. And you? I hear you're in Misato's old job?"

He grins, leaning on the table. His eyes are on her face, which is an improvement over the gawky fourteen year old who could not take his eyes off her breasts. There is an alertness to his eyes that is new, and for her, intriguing.

"I have," she says, "I am currently Ops Commander for NERV-1."

"The look suits you," he says with a smile.

Reflexively, she blushes. That is the problem. Any potential mate she finds usually falls into two categories; attached and related. While she is sure that Pilot Suzuhara could make many strong babies, she also knows Mrs. Suzuhara would not react kindly. The same goes for the entire bridge crew and many of those under her command. Those not related or attached are put off by her appearance, which is admittedly not normal.

Except…

"You have been in dangerous situations?" she asks.

"A few," he says, scratching the back of his head, "I had to outrun a lion last month when I got too close to a pride. I stumbled on a flock of Emperor Penguins when investigating the polar shift, and in South Africa of all places. It's dangerous work."

She nods, smiling.

"I would be interested in seeing it," she says.

"Really? Well, I keep collections in my apartment. I mean, you're…well, I've known you for a while, I wouldn't charge you to see a documentary."

"Do you live near here?" she asks.

"Yeah, as a matter of fact. I'm two blocks down."

*

*

* * *

*

*

"What the Hell happened to you?"

Asuka rolls her eyes, placing the last suitcase against the living room wall. In the time she was gone after the fight, Misato had people come in and clean the mess, which she will admit she is grateful for, albeit not to Misato's face. The room looks as good as new, and she leans against the couch, before walking to the kitchen medicine cabinet and downing a pill.

Dr. Akagi's cure-all, she thinks, Good as new in the morning.

"I had a disagreement with a co-worker," Asuka says, "It won't happen again."

"I hope to God not," Marie says, arms folded, standing in the middle of the living room, "Asuka, I know this is rough, but I can't just leave Ari here if you're picking fights with people!"

"It. Won't. Happen. Again."

Jerking her head to the side, she points to the bedroom.

"Let's go," she says, "Private."

Marie nods, and walks into the bedroom, disapproving eyes on Asuka at all times. Grunting to herself, she walks in after her. Neither of them notice the door peeking open into the small, second bedroom.

*

*

* * *

*

*

"So, this is my personal favorite," Ken says, walking along the two side by side book cases full of photo albums, "I mean, I've been doing this for God knows how long. I love photography, I love seeing the world, and since people are interested in how the environment's been recovering since Second Impact, I've got a big market. I made this trip over to Alaska two years ago."

"This is agreeable."

"Really?"

He takes the album, turning on his heel.

The photo album drops to the floor.

Just in time with the last of Rei's clothes. Standing stock still, eyes wide as saucers, Ken takes in the full impact of the scene before him. Mouth open, stammering, he can only stare.

At least until the pale hand grabs him by the shirt.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Shinji looks up from the wok in front of him as a light knocking echoes in the kitchen. Turning down the heat, he walks to the door and opens it, finding no one there. Then, he looks down.

Standing before him is a girl no older than five, with red hair tied into pig tails and dressed in a red, frilly dress. She is holding her hands behind her, swaying back and forth, and smiling. The smile is warm, comforting, and genuine, and she giggles as he is taken aback.

"Ariel?" he asks.

"Hi," she says, "You were with my Mama at the airport, right?"

"Yes I was," Shinji says, "Does your Mama know you're here?"

"Nope. She's yelling at Aunt Marie right now," Ariel says with a sigh, "They're locked in her bedroom. It takes hours when it gets like that."

Leaning against the doorway, Shinji sighs. The more things change, the more they stay the same. He knew Asuka had a step sister, and while he's only met Marie by proxy when she helped him trick Asuka into dinner and when she showed up at the air port, even eight years couldn't have made the relationship smooth.

"I'm about to have dinner," he says, "Say, tell you what. We'll leave my front door open, and you can join me."

"Okay!" Ariel says, and purses her lips, "You're a good cook, right?"

"Would I offer if I was a bad cook?"

"No," Ariel says, leaning back and forth. He gestures her in, locking the door into open position and jamming in a wooden door stopper underneath, setting out two plates as he empties the contents of the wok onto them. Grilled and steamed vegetables and fish, filling the kitchen and living room with their airy smell, as he hands her a fork and they begin.

"Why does Mama call you Third?" she asks.

"Because when we were kids, that was my job title," he says, sitting on the stool across from her, "She was called the Second."

"If she was Second, and you were Third, was she better than you?"

"Oh, most definitely," he responds with a grin, "A lot better trained than me, for starters. And she was a lot better at fighting than I was."

"You fought?"

"Ms. Sohryu, are you telling me that your mother never told you what she did here?"

She shakes her head. Odd, he thinks, she was always proud of her time as a pilot. Pride was actually…well, more like borderline sociopathic. It was her world, her life. For her to just discard it…

A door slams down the hallway. Frantic footsteps.

"_ARI!"_

Asuka skids to a stop in the doorway. At the table, Ariel waves, and Asuka visibly deflates, grabbing the doorway for support.

"We're just having dinner," Shinji says, "If you and your sister need to talk, she can stay here."

"I…okay," Asuka says, nodding as she composes herself, "Okay. I'll be back for her. Don't...worry me like that."

She shakily walks back to her apartment, door slamming. Some yelling, incoherent, from the other side. Ariel continues happily eating, as Shinji tents his fingers in front of his face, knotting his brow…

*

*

* * *

*

*

_Whumpa._

_ Whumpa whumpa whumpa whumpa squeeeeaky whumpa whumpa squeeeeeaaaaak._

"Oh…oh my God. Oh my God, Rei-"

"Round two."

"…oh god-"

_Whumpa whumpa whumpa whumpa whumpa whumpa whumpa WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA squeak._

"Do you require anything?"

"…an IV and a glass of orange juice…?"

"Do you require anything that does not require me leaving the bed?"

"Uh…"

"Do you want me to untie you?"

"…yes, please."

"Mm."

"Rei?"

"Too bad."

_WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA-_

*

*

* * *

*

*

He let Ariel watch television after she helped him clean up dinner. He doesn't subscribe to any dirty channels, since he is, as her mother once put it, a 'boring little boy'. So, satisfied that she is occupied, he walks into his bedroom to get his laptop and work. Walking in, he kicks the door closed, walking to the charging computer as-

"_Don't you DARE lecture me!_"

That was Asuka. Pressing his hand against the wall, he hears the vibrations from the sound against the wall, the yelling and-

He pulls his hand away. From what he can tell, one of them just slammed the bed frame to make a point. Sitting on his bed, he listens.

"_It's different, Marie. You know it's different-"_

_ "Asuka, if you're not ready to take care of Ariel I can take her back with me-"_

_ "You are NOT taking my daughter from me! You are NOT leaving me here alone when she's the reason I came here in the first place!"_

Lying back on the bed, he folds his hands behind his head, listening. He's always been good at listening, at waiting, at taking in information that others may not want him to know. This is one such case.

"_You're not ready, Asuka. I'm not blaming you. We both know you never planned to have Ariel in the first place, and it's not your fault."_

_ "No, you're saying I'm going to f___ this up as bad as my mother did, Marie. You're saying I'm going to end up screwing her up as bad as she did!"_

_ "I'm not saying that-"_

_ "She's the same age I was, damn it! She's the same age I was when I came home and found her SWINGING FROM A LIGHT FIXTURE! I will NEVER do that to her, do you understand?"_

_ "I believe you Asuka. Really, I do. But…Asuka, can you do this?"_

He sighs, listening. He remembers reading reports, reading personnel files. At one point, when Shinji thought he had enough of her, Misato took him aside and explained. Asuka found out and didn't speak to either of them for a week.

"_I…can. I can. I think I can. God, I hope I can."_

_ "Your cute next door neighbor is willing to help."_

_ "I can't do that to him, Marie. He…Ariel's not his, you know? I can't make him play father to a child that isn't his."_

_ "How do you know, Asuka? You said it yourself…_"

Eyes snapping open, he sits up.

"_You have no idea who Ariel's father is."_

*

*

* * *

*

*

_WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA-_

"Nn…uh…"

"Yes?"

"Dear Penthouse…I never thought this would happen to me…"

"One more smart comment and I gag you."

"Yes ma'am."

_WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA-_

*

*

* * *

*

*

The night sky has a bright hanging moon, a swath of red running over it, and Asuka is looking at it, staring. Ariel is asleep, and Marie has checked into her hotel, leaving Asuka alone with her thoughts as she leans on the railing, clad in her nightgown and robe.

The scent of coffee brings her back to her senses as a cup is held under her nose, and she turns, taking the offered cup and smiling, faintly, tired, at Shinji.

"Thank you," she says.

"Not a problem," he responds.

"No. No, I meant…thank you. For helping me with Ariel. I…I'm not really ready, I think. In Germany, Ari would spend so much time with her grandparents and her aunt and…"

She trails off, sipping her coffee, sucking back tears as she stares at the sky.

"Asuka," he says, "Why don't you know?"

She stares at him…and bites her lip, turning away.

"Spying on me, now?"

"Our apartments are inverted. Your bedroom's on the same wall mine is," he says, "Please, talk to me."

"No."

She turns from him, hugging herself. Taking his life in his hands, he grabs her shoulder, turning her to him, nearly spilling the coffee as her face turns down, eyes closed.

"Talk to me," he says, "Please."

"What would you do?" she asks.

"What?"

"What if it wasn't my choice," she says, "What if I was, I don't know, drugged, kidnapped, and woke up finding myself pregnant? What if I don't know who the father is because I've been f___ed so many times I can't remember? What if it's…"

"Were any of those true?"

"What if they were," she says, pulling away from him.

"Then I'd find the people responsible and I'd ask my father for tips on torture," he says, hands clenching and unclenching, "But you're just trying to get a reaction out of me. Asuka, please, tell me."

"What if it's yours?"

"I can't see any way she is," he says, "For one thing, the only time you've even been civil to me was when you were drunk. Second, I wouldn't _forget._"

Lip trembling where he can't see, she wraps her arms tightly around herself, her back turned. Slowly, gently, he places his hands on her shoulders, drawing her into an unsteady hug, her back to his chest, her nose in his hair. Tears begin leaking from her eyes as she turns and buries her head in his shoulder.

"I named her after my mother and the Angel that raped my mind," she says, voice muffled, "I named her after the two things who _f___ed_ me up beyond recognition, just so I wouldn't do that to _her._ I can't…I can't tell you, not yet. Okay?"

"Okay," he says, "I can wait. You should get to bed so you're alert for tomorrow, okay?"

She nods. And standing on her tip toes, she leans in and presses her lips against his. Moaning through the kiss, his arms wrap around her, her lips sliding against his. No tongue, no heavy breathing. No slamming against walls or tearing at clothes.

Just a long, tender kiss, under the moonlight.

She smiles, stepping back.

"Thanks," he says.

"For?"

"Not holding my nose closed," he responds.

She smiles. A small, genuine smile, and walks back into the apartment. And sighing, he turns and walks back into his.

*

*

* * *

*

*

The plaster is cracked, the bed frame is warped, and Kensuke Aida has the widest grin he has ever worn on his face. Groaning, he sits up as Rei finishes buttoning her uniform jacket, slipping on her shoes.

"Disappointed?" he asks.

"The maternal side of my nature is demanding I procreate," she says, "However, my heightened sense of self-awareness tells me I am not with child."

"Oh."

"You are an acceptable candidate," she says, running a hand through her hair, "Shall we try again?"

"Dinner, tomorrow?"

"Acceptable."

She turns on her heel and walks out. Arms wide, Ken collapses onto his bed with a groan. Finally, shakily, he raises a hand, closing it into a fist and pointing his thumb up.

"Well, that settles it," he says, "There _is_ a God."


	5. Magnificent Bastards

The pillow was dry when she woke up, so that's a good sign. A sleep not haunted by the past or terrified of the future. She lay in bed following the waking for long minutes, simply basking in the streaming sunlight and smiling. Then she realized she had to work today and got up.

It took a little work to rouse Ariel, to. The jet lag and travel finally caught up to her, and it took Asuka shaking her to get her up. Still, the morning calls, and she has school. Tokyo-3 is nothing if not efficient, and by extension so are they.

"Do I hafta go to school?" the girl whines.

"And I hafta go to work," Asuka responds with a small smile, tightening her robe around herself as they walk into the kitchen. Rubbing her eyes, yawning, she opens the cupboard…

And finds ramen. Lots and lots of ramen. Muttering to herself, she opens the fridge and finds instant meal after instant meal.

_Stupid,_ she thinks, _STUPID! All this sturm and drang and I never properly shopped…_

"Mama, what's for breakfast?"

Staring at the fridge, Asuka's mouth opens, trying to formulate an excuse. She remembers this situation well enough. Her mother would find her in this situation, so wrapped up in work and petty jealousy that she would forget to properly feed them and…

"I'll get it!"

Ariel skips over to the door, swinging it open. Holding a covered, steaming tray of food in his hands, Shinji Ikari smiles down at her. He looks up as the slack jawed Asuka, smiling to her as their eyes lock.

"I keep making too much for me," he says, "Care to join me for breakfast?"

-

-

**Chapter 4: Impromptu Dealings and Magnificient Bastards**

-

-

There is a part of Gendo Ikari that is formulating an ingenius plan to kill Kensuke Aida and make sure no one ever finds the body. He can do that, after all. He's the most powerful man in the country, after all. Maybe even the entire _world._ He could get away with it if he wanted to.

It is obvious to those who knew him best that Gendo Ikari has changed in the past twelve years. It is obvious is he no longer as outright evil or blood thirsty, and the only other person who knows for certain why isn't saying why. Needless to say, Gendo is tight lipped on this, to.

He wonders if Rei just likes messing with him. It was apparent from day one after Third Impact that she changed. She become a little more outgoing, more sneaky. The part of her that was her biological mother was coming into full bloom, as well as life lessons from careful observation of the Bastard King. She is enjoying this, he realizes, as he sits with his hands tented and eyebrow raised, as Rei describes what is not only her first…_intimate…_experience, but how she nonetheless made it last _seven hours._

He blames the Angelic material used to create her, because Yui sure as Hell didn't have that stamina.

"I am unsure what status a child created by myself and a human would have," she says, "As I am not technically human, would a child created by myself be considered human, or still a Nephilem?"

"I believe Doctor Akagi would be a better authority to consult, Rei," he responds.

_**Because this is a subject I don't want to touch with a ten foot pole.**_

The door swings open, Rei turning and raising an eyebrow as Shinji walks in.

"Doctor Sohryu's been dropped off at her lab," he says, "Her daughter is at school. Sir."

"You have a question," Gendo says, tenting his hands as he stares at Shinji, "Get it out of the way now."

"Asuka does not know the identity of Ariel's father," Shinji says, "Is there a reason for that?"

"Did she tell you?"

Shinji winces, shaking his head.

"No."

"Then she has a reason for not telling you," Gendo responds, "Remember your duties, Inspector. I would rather have the Inspector for NERV to be trusted and respected, rather than thought of as someone who sneaks information behind everyone's back."

Shinji grimaces, gritting his teeth. Memories of Kaji, the man who was his father figure for much of his childhood, comes to the forefront. Clicking his heels together, he nods.

"Sir."

"I have every…faith…that Doctor Sohryu will explain the situation to you in time."

"Because you know, don't you?" Shinji asks.

Beneath his hands, Gendo smiles.

"Of course I do."

"How…"

"I am the Commander of NERV, Inspector. I know _everything._ This is well established and should not be a surprise. Dismissed."

"Sir," the siblings both say, turning and walking out.

Shinji mutters to himself as they walk down the blue polished hallway, walking into the lift.

"So what were you talking with Father about?" he asks.

"My marathon sexual encounter with Kensuke Aida."

Choking, Shinji turns just as the doors close.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Clad in a bathrobe, clipping her toenails, Asuka Langely Sohryu, head of Project E, listens on the phone, smiling as she talks to her friend. Ariel quickly made a good first impression on all her playmates at the daycare center, and ended up going home with Hikari when Asuka had to work a little late.

Hence the talk now. Eight years of catching up, eight years of things unsaid. Asuka smiles, leaning back on the couch, pulling the robe closed tighter, and smiles as her friend gushes on how well behaved her daughter is.

"Thanks," Asuka says, "It's been difficult. I don't have the support I did at home."

No, her friend, reminds her, you have the support of your friends here.

And then the other question comes. The question Hikari wouldn't have asked eight years ago, but her new, more forceful personality demands an answer to. A question about the person who brought her back to Tokyo-3, and, if rumors are to be believed, has made a distinct impression on her.

Her cheeks flush, memories of the hotel, of her _throwing_ herself at him and him resisting come back. Memories of last night come.

"He's…he's changed. He's changed a lot. Whatever he saw just…I don't know, pulled him out of the pit he was in, when he stopped Third Impact. I…no, I don't think that, Hikari. I just don't think I can…I don't think I can have a relationship. I tried that a lot in Germany, and…well, let's just say the scars lose their novelty when every boy you meet thinks you're a freak."

She listens, nodding.

"Yeah, well it just won't," she says, "I have to do some work. Touji'll bring her back? Great. Bye."

She closes the phone, running her hands through her hair. She stares at the scar running down her right arm, where she remembers a Lance from one of the MP Evas slicing her arm right down the middle. Through flesh, through bone.

"Gott, what's wrong with me?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Another day, another Kaiju. Shinji walks onto the bridge of Dogma just as a large, pink rabbit is hacked to death with an axe by Unit-11, one of the Mass Production Evas repainted gray and blue and with its jaw sealed shut. If anything, using something like that to slaughter a giant bunny is perfect, as it shows that those things were complete, utter monsters.

"The pilot wants to be a veternarian," Misato says, motion Shinji over to her raised platform, "Bet she's thinking twice, now."

Shinji blanches, taking a place next to his former guardian and long time friend, the bridge crew counting off numbers and confirming the Kaiju as dead.

"So, how've you been?" she asks.

"Fine," he says, "Asuka moved next door to me."

"I know. I tasered her and Rei when they got into it," she responds, "So…"

"So?"

"Have you and her…"

"No." Muttering something, he rolls his eyes, paying attention to the operation to ignore her needling, "Her daughter's a nice girl, though. Have you met her?"

"Shinji, I haven't said more that two words that were not scolding to her since she arrived. You _know_ we parted on bad terms. I'll give her some space."

He nods, hands thrust into his pockets. They remain silent for a long moment, as Shinji rolls his head back with a sigh. That is an understatement. Asuka's last moments at the Katsuragi household eight years ago were a constant screaming match. Misato had already gone sober at that point, had already tried putting her past behind her…but still, some hateful things were said.

"Any idea who the father is?"

"No," Shinji says, "Asuka doesn't know, either. And don't start. She's had some…issues. She's had it rough."

"You playing tonsil hockey with her in Berlin probably helps."

He turns to her, narrowing his eyes.

"Are you spying on me?"

"Please. Shinji. I am the Sub Commander of NERV."

She smirks.

"I spy on _everyone._"

*

*

* * *

*

*

"Were you really my Mom's friend?"

It is with some trepidation that Asuka looks into the eyes of the girl named after her. Asuka Horaki and Asuka Langely Sohryu sit on the neat, white cloth couch of the Horaki Residence, Asuka having taken the incentive and come over herself. She can't avoid people forever, after all.

"Yes it is," she says, "Your mother and I were friends back in our teens, when I first lived here."

"Why'd you leave? My Mom gets sad when she talks about who I was named after."

Sighing, Asuka looks down at the girl. Answers don't come easy to these questions.

_Well, I was just a ball of insecurities and trauma, so I ran away._

_ Oh, I was also maimed by nine weapons of mass destruction._

_ Aaaand my only real reason for living at that point was dead and gone._

"I had to go back to my family."

Not an _outright_ lie. She did. Well, she went to their doorstep and begged to be let back home, which they happily did. After all, her stepmother had no trouble parading around her stepdaughter, the _evangelion_ pilot and showing her off to friends as a status symbol, and Papa didn't do anything to upset her. Either of them.

"Asuka, don't you have homework to do?"

Asuka, little Asuka, turns and smiles.

"Yes, Papa!"

Skipping, she hurries out, footsteps clapping up the stairs. Sighing, groaning, Asuka looks up at the figure walking into the living room, hands on his hips. Now, he manages to be intimidating, which is even more embarassing. Touji Suzuhara is a good head taller than her now. His bottomless stomach has apparently paid off for him, and his brick wall appearance manages to make him a physically imposing figure.

"So," he says.

"So," she responds.

"I hear you've got Doc Akagi's old job," he says, "How'd you manage that?"

"By redefining how the technology works at my professor job," she says, "Did I mention that? I'm a Professor Laureate. It's _Doctor_ Devil to you now, Stooge."

"Man, you're kid's a whole lot more polite than you are," he says, walking to the fridge and taking out a soda, "So, what's the deal? You certainly got yer head on straighter, I'll say that."

"And you've certainly been bountiful with your multiplication," she mutters, hands on her lap, "When's the third?"

"When we get a full night's sleep," he responds, "Want something?"

"No."

"Figured," he says with a grin, "Figured if the third's a boy, we're naming him after Shinji. Fourth gets named after me, Fifth get's named after Nagisa. Boy or girl, since we weren't sure with him."

She snorts.

"Making your own Eva pilot corps?"

"Be careful with Shinji, will ya?" he asks.

Her face turns serious, folding her arms.

"What?"

"He's been through the ringer a few times. When you left it really got him. Got him here."

He pounds his chest. His heart.

"Sides which, my sister's got a crush on him an' all, so even if you drive him nutbars, he'll bounce back. Just so you know you're not the only fish in his sea an' all."

She stands up, as the door opens and Ariel skips out, followed by Hikari. The matriach or the Suzuharas smiles, walking over to Asuka and hugging her. The two old time friends say nothing, needing to say nothing, as Ariel smiles, brightly and warmly at her mother.

"We have to get going," Asuka says, "I'm going to be working late a lot. Is it okay…"

"Don't even ask," Hikari says, patting Asuka on the arms, "Ariel's an absolute angel. In a good way. We'll be happy to take care of her."

Asuka smiles, a wide genuine smile. The kind that does not come too often these days, taking her friend's hands and squeezing them.

"Let's go," she says, "Let's go home."

*

*

* * *

*

*

She got breakfast foods on the way home from work the previous day. Ariel munches on cereal as Asuka finishes putting on her blouse. Sure, it's not what their neighbor, the amateur gourmet cook makes, but it's good enough. Looking herself in the mirror, she purses her lips, leaning her head to the right, craning her neck. She traces his finger on the white discoloration. One of her scars. She remembers the feeling, the feeling of heat and metal, when the lance impaled Unit 02 on the neck.

She has nine of them, total. The eye is hard to notice, since the lance went through Unit 02's eye sockets and, by extension, her's. The arm is the worst, running the length. She has one just off the center of her chest, between her breasts, two on her stomach, one on her right shoulder, two on her right leg, and a final one at her left knee.

Her knee gives her aches when it rains, still.

They told her she shattered all her synchronization records during that fight. She had a level of over 300%. Maybe, if she tried harder, she would have done what Shinji did. Get absorbed into the Eva.

She'd still be there today, if she did. Mama didn't want to let her go.

"Stop it," she says through gritted teeth, "Stop dwelling on it, damn you."

Two weeks. Thens he would have officially been a better mother than Kyoko Zeppelin Sohryu. Two weeks Ariel will be older than when she came home to walk in on her mother's suicide.

"Mama? Are you ready?" Ariel calls from the hallway.

"Yes, Ari," Asuka says, taking her glasses and sliding them on, "Mama's ready."

*

*

* * *

*

*

Eyes closed, leaning in the swivel chair in his office tucked somewhere neatly away in NERV-1, Shinji puts his feet up on his desk and _thinks._ Lately, he's found himself easily getting into his father's head. Scarily, in fact. The mind of Gendo Ikari is not a pleasant place, if anyone can find himself in the mindset, it is his son.

He is pondering the situation. He is wondering what his father is planning. He is wondering what he is planning for Asuka.

Father gave his word, in confidence, that he will not try anything untowards with her. He believes him, somewhat, or at least has to. She is brilliant, but professors and scientists would climb over themselves to work on the Evangelions, so that leaves some ulterior motive.

A motive most likely involving Ariel.

"How long have I been here," he says to himself, checking the clock. All day. The clock reads six at night. Most everyone else has left at this point, and he's finally noticing that he's hungry.

Clocking out, he exits the base without drawing undue attention. Walking through the streets of Tokyo-3, he decides to go cheap and easy, ducking into a ramen stand a mile from the apartment building and buying a bowl. Surveying the landscape as he walks an elevated platform, part of the fortress system, he eats, slurping…and stops.

For a moment, he thought he saw something familiar. Someone familiar.

For the life of him, he can't think of who.

*

*

* * *

*

*

A slide displays, showing relative scale of an Evangelion towards a human.

"Evangelion technology is based on mental synchronization of a pilot to a much larger creature."

The slide shifts again. A man holding up a dumbbell, and an Evangelion holding up a truck. On the slide, they are the same scale, both fitting neatly in the lifter's hand.

"Due to the nature of the link, the Evangelion is limited to the mental limits of the pilot. Just like adrenaline can turn off pain receptors and cause a person to be able to perform superhuman feats, such feats should be possible for an Evangelion."

"And indeed, have been proven," Gendo Ikari says, hands tented in front of his face.

The slides shut off, Asuka nodding. Dressed in a red sweater and black skirt, her lab coat framing her perfectly. Her face serious, professional, the glasses on her face aiding in her air of scholarly discipline. Her hair is combed back in a wave, draped behind her neck.

The sun is setting behind the Commander, as he breaks the position of his fingers and leans back.

"Doctor Sohryu," he says, "I am impressed."

She starts, and nods, faintly smiling.

"Thank you, sir," she says, "With this system in place, the performance of the in-service Evangelions can be increased significantly."

"Indeed. I had admittant doubts about you, Sohryu. I am pleased that you proved me wrong. I believe this may call for a celebration."

Reaching into his desk, he takes out an amber glass bottle, holding two glasses in the other hand.

"Join me for a drink, Doctor Sohryu?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Twelve years ago, at the heart of the Instrumentality of Man. Gendo Ikari and Shinji Ikari stare in wonder and amazement as the now-radiant form of Yui Ikari rises before them, the song of three billion souls marking her passing.

"Now that we have that unpleasantness out of the way," she says, "I welcome you. You were both magnificient. My driven, focused husband and my beautiful, beautiful boy. The Instrumentality, the Evolution of Man, has come.

"The union of Mankind shall have at its core a vast and Godlike will. Are you ready to join me?"

A moment of silence passes. Before them is everything they ever wanted.

Isn't it?

"No," Shinji whispers.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Eyes open with a start. His nap concludes as he hears a sharp, loud knocking on the door. Slipping out of his bed, he walks out of the bedroom, scratching his head as he walks across his living room and opens the door. Leaning on the door…well, more like falling against the door, Asuka hums a German drinking ditty, smirking at him.

"Heeeeey there," she says with a giggle and burp.

Swaying in the doorway, she grabs onto the doorframe for dear life, chortling.

"Are you alright?" he asks.

"Better," she slurrs, "'m _hammered._ How's 'bout you?"

She steps forward and promptly falls, Shinji lunging and grabbing her. She giggles, turning to a laugh as she slaps him on the shoulder, letting him carry her towards a chair in the kitchen. He sets her down, and with a grunt walks to the fridge.

"Where's Ariel?"

"With the other kids," she says, swaying in the seat, "Lil' miss Motherhood's got her fer the night! I'ma free woman!"

Yes, Shinji thinks, definitely hammered. He grabs a tuperware container full of leftovers. What he needs to do is get her something to eat and she'll probably sober up faster.

"Asuka, let me get you something."

He turns, just as her sweater lands on the counter. To his credit, he doesn't drop the tupperware, placing it on the counter next to him as Asuka shakily rises, clumsily unzipping her skirt as she braces on the table, stumbling to him.

"What are you doing?"

"What'd it look like, Third," she drawls.

Standing up, in her shoes, red underwear and bra and her hose, Asuka grins as she lunges towards him…and promprly falls on her face. Almost the moment she does so, he's at her side, grabbing her arm, helping her up to her knees. Grinning, she lunges, grabbing the front of his shirt and kissing him. Sloppily, messily. He tastes scotch on her breath as she pushes him onto the floor. She pins his hands to the floor, ending the kiss as she licks her lips, tracing her tongue on her teeth.

"Wees gonna have _fun_ tonight," she giggles, "Oo yes we are!"

"Asuka," he breathes, "Don't do this-"

A start. She lets him go, her eyes going wide and face turning red.

"No!" she shouts, face twisting, a mix of embarassment and anger on her face, "No! No! No! No! No!"

She pushes off of him, stomping on her hands and knees. Screaming, she starts bashing her fists against the floor, as Shinji crawls over, reaching out for her.

"Don't _TOUCH ME!_" she screams, "Don't you _F___ING TOUCH ME!_"

Ignoring her screams, he places his hands on her shoulders, pulling her into an embrace as her knuckles start bleeding. She begins clawing at his arm, her screaming dying down as she goes limp. She says nothing, her face placid, letting him guide her to the couch.

"Asuka," he says, cupping her chin with both hands, "Asuka, what's _wrong?_"

"Why won't anyone touch me," she whispers, "Why won't anyone touch me? What the Hell is wrong with me if no one will touch me?"

"Asuka…"

"Used to think it was so easy," she whispers, "No one wants _me. _Thought you care…no one cares…thought your father got me drunk to f___ me but just called Section 2 to take me home."

"My father?" Shinji asks, "My _father_ did this to you?!"

She doesn't respond, and Shinji sighs, pressing his forehead against her's. He picks her up, cradling her as he carries her to the bedroom. Gently, he lays her down on the bed. Just like Berlin, he thinks, just like last time. He wonders, for a moment, just how must he underestimated how broken she is. How much he can do.

Last time, he left. This time, maybe because he's curious, maybe because he's seen the extent, maybe because this is his bedroom and he doesn't particularly like the couch, he waits. Standing at the bed, he waits, watching as she curls up, watching her back turn to him.

Slowly, steadily, he climbs into bed next to her, and clicks off the light.

*

*

* * *

*

*

With a grin on his face, hands tented in front of him, Gendo Ikari watches the scene in his son's bedroom. Standing at attention in front of his desk, Rei raises an eyebrow.

"You have arranged this situation to pair Inspector Ikari with Doctor Sohryu?"

"Shinji carries emotional baggage that itself needs to be resolved," he responds, "By dealing with Sohryu's own issues, he will deal with his own."

"I see," she responds.

"You do not sound convinced."

"You have another purpose," she says, "You have, in the past, considered me a confidant. I request to know what it is."

He stares at her. Nodding, he presses another button. The full scenario displays for her, and for a moment, for a brief moment, Rei comprehends it all…

And smiles.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Opening his eyes, he sees the clock is past midnight. Looking from the clock, he lets his eyes wander down to Asuka, seeing her eyes open and staring at them. Her contact is gone, her red and blue eye staring at him. Looking past her face, he sees her in the moonlight. In the moonlight, he can't see the scars. Only her.

"Shinji?" she asks.

There is a tremor in her voice. A whisper in it that he can hear.

"Asuka?"

"Shinji, do you respect me?"

"I do," he says, "I wouldn't be here if I didn't."

"Good," she says with a shaky smile, "Because I'm going to completely _f___ing_ lose it right now, okay?"

He pulls her to him as she begins crying. Her face buries in his shirt as she begins sobbing, screaming, her entire body shaking as he presses his lips to the top of her head. He waits, listening. Listening to the sounds of her whispers and hitched voice, listening to her as her tears wet his shirt. Arms wrapped around her, it takes hours for her to stop. Hours of her screaming, of her crying, of her whimpering in his arms.

Hours of her cursing her mother, cursing her father, cursing herself. Hours of her sobbing about her screwing up, about how her daughter deserves so much better. About how she's failing, just like her mother did.

Hours until she finally falls into an exhausted, fitful, merciful slumber.

*

*

* * *

*

*

"Doctor Sohryu will be absent today," Rei says, standing in front of the Commander's desk, "Inspector Ikari called for her. She is sleeping off exhaustion."

"I see," he responds, tapping up holographic images of expense reports, "I believe it may be about time to bring phase 2 into the forefront."

The doors swing open.

"You _son of a bitch!"_

Upon entering the room, Shinji snarls, crossing the distance between the entrance and the desk.

"Can I help you?"

"What the _hell_ are you doing," Shinji demands, "You got her drunk on purpose, didn't you?! I spent four hours last night calming her down!"

"And you succeeded."

"What game are you playing," he growls, hands on the desk, "You wouldn't do this unless you had an angle, and I'm pretty sure it's not to get grandchildren!"

"For all you know, I already have one," Gendo responds, hands tented, "I will not have you accuse me of acting untoward towards an employee, Inspector. Kindly get to the point."

"What is Ariel to you?"

"You believe my designs rest on the five year old child of the head of Project E?"

"I believe you're manipulating Asuka to get at her."

"Or I could be manipulating Doctor Sohryu because she is _easy to manipulate,"_ Gendo says with a small grin, "I will remind you, Inspector. Of all the pilots, Sohryu was the one who had the least solo Angel kills to her credit. Her synchronization score was based on a deluded self image, and upon the realization of how her own sociopathic behavior affected the ones around her, she crashed. And burned."

Shinji narrows his eyes, snarling. With a yell, he lunges at the desk, Rei bringing her hand up to stop him. Underneath the hands, Gendo grins wider.

"God _damn_ you," Shinji growls, "Stay _away_ from them."

He pushes Rei away, and walks out. Leaning back in the chair, Gendo smiles.

"Phase 2," he says.


	6. Ariel

The showerhead comes to life, hot water washing away last night. Bracing her hands on the tile wall, Asuka closes her eyes and rolls her neck, groaning as she rests her head against the wall. It's not her shower, it's _his_, and despite that she used to think he was such a _boring little boy,_ she's being forced every minute of every day to reassess that judgement.

"Not so boring," she mutters to herself.

Twice, so far. Twice so far she's thrown herself at him, and both times he's shown stronger character than she suspected. Maybe than he's suspected. Sighing, she leans back, flattening her back against the wall.

Maybe this was not such a bad idea, coming back here, after all.

-

-

**Chapter 5: Ariel**

**-**

**-**

The footsteps of the creature echo through the city as it approaches, the sound of whirring gears and loud impacts. The design of the beast has changed, streamlined over the years. Jet Alone Prime, a two hundred foot tall behemoth of titanium and steel, marches along, its whirring red eye spinning like a spotlight.

Shinji stares at it as he walks along the raised street. Holding his hand, the five year old girl beams back at him as they continue walking.

"You fought that?" she asks.

"Well, sort of," he says, "A friend of mine shut it off when it went crazy, I just got her there."

"Why don't you fight anymore?"

_Because my mother turned out to be a psychotic bitch with a god complex._

"I decided to go into another job," he responds.

"But you're still working for him?"

"My father?" Shinji sighs, "My father…was once not like he is now. He was driven. Crazy. He drove everyone else away to do something, but in the end it wasn't worth it. We…we don't see eye to eye, but I think we get along a lot better."

"Oh. Mama doesn't get along with her Dad. She doesn't like him very much."

"Oh. What about your grandma?"

"Mama doesn't like her, either," Ariel says, face downcast, "When she's sleeping, she cries about her Mama."

He stops. Going down to one knee, Shinji puts his hands on Ariel's shoulders, looking her in the eye. He smiles, shakily, trying to find the right words to say, buying time with his smile.

"Ariel," he says, "Your Mama had a very bad childhood. Her mother was…she never had time for her. She ignored her. She put her work ahead of her. Does yours?"

"No. Mama gets upset if she doesn't see me."

"That's right. Your Mama had a very bad day yesterday, so she had you stay with Aunt Hikari for the night. She didn't want to take it out on you. Do you understand?"

Ariel nods, smiling. That warm, genuine smile.

"Your Mama wants to see you very much, now. We should go home."

And taking her hand, they do just that.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Watching the child's sleeping form, Asuka smiles. Leaning down, she pecks her on the forehead, softly walking out of the room and closing the door. Shinji is in her kitchen, cleaning the last dishes. He brought her home, cooked them dinner, watched television with her while Asuka did some work.

"Good to see you're still housebroken," she says.

He chuckles, not recoils, placing the last dishes on the drying rack.

"I should get going," he says, "Are you going to be alright?"

"Yeah," she says, folding her hands in front of her, "Can you stay for a little?"

She looks positively relaxed. She dressed in red pajamas and a nightrobe, walked on bare feet all day. She'll be back at NERV tomorrow, of course. But for now, she looks at ease.

"Okay," he says.

She gestures to the couch, sitting on it as he does. Patiently, she waits, waits as he relaxes, slightly. Waits for him to sit, hands folded in his lap, ready to listen.

"I didn't give birth to Ariel," she says, "But she's my biological daughter. I don't know who the father is because I'm not cleared at a high enough level to know."

"What do you mean…"

She holds up her hand to silence him. Closing her eyes, she continues.

"About four and a half years ago, a subsection was found at NERV-Germany. Inside was a room filled with LCL as well as immature…copies. Ariel was the only viable one. Since she was genetically based half on me, I took her in."

"She's…a Dummy Plug? You're telling me Ariel's a…clone?"

She nods, sadly. Pieces fall together in his mind. The sadness, the hesitancy. The renewed hatred of Rei if only because the child is something exactly _like Rei._

"I…I have no idea how to raise a child," she says, "I know that she's mine, but it's _hard._ I love her more than…and she's the same age as me, when…"

"Ariel's happy," he says, taking her hand in his own, "When you're sad, she's sad. She knows you cry in your sleep. Asuka, you are _not_ your mother. Do you believe me?"

Sniffling, she nods. She reaches out and hugs him, pressing her face against his shoulder. They stay like that for a long while, a final barrier falling between them. Trust. A secret she was unwilling to share until that night, when he came home with her daughter holding his hand.

"You're wrong," she says.

"About?"

"You're a _great_ father."

He smiles, holding her at arms length.

"Asuka, I'm not her father."

"To her, you are," she says, "Do you know what's worse for dates than being a freak like me? A freak with a _kid._ But…I guess that's all they needed to…"

He places a finger on her lips.

"None of them are good enough for you," he says, smiling as he actually makes her blush, "You're…you're you. I…"

Now he blushes, to. Laughing, both of them laughing, he scratches the back of his head, once more nervous.

"I should get some sleep," he says, "You should, to. Want me to come by with breakfast?"

"That'd be great."

He nods, shakily standing, and quickly walks out. Asuka watches him go, then with a satisfied groan, collapses onto her back.

*

*

* * *

*

*

She must have been tired, Kensuke Aida thinks. After all, their session tonight only lasted three hours, and when Rei was done, she laid down next to him and fell asleep. It is times like this that he wonders whether ot not she has a greater need behind this. Not just a need for reproduction, but something more.

Looking down, he sees her head resting on his chest. Soft breaths escape her mouth, soft, almost inaudible snores as her chest rises and falls. Her skin is like marble, like alabaster, and in the dim moonlight he can still make her out clearly.

Maybe, just maybe…

He's falling in love.

Maybe he should hold her, kiss her in the moonlight.

But to do that, first he has to unlock the handcuffs.

*

*

* * *

*

*

The door opens with a squeak, and Misato Katsuragi enters her office. It was no secret currently that Shinji had a mad-on for the Commander, and Misato used one of the priviledges of her well-earned rank to tell Commander Ikari that what he did was pretty god damn shitty. Sure, she and Asuka don't exactly see eye to eye, but the girl was more or less her daughter for four years.

Then she saw what Asuka did. First, she couldn't remember the key code for her apartment door, then ended up at Shinji's apartment and tried to ride him like a bicycle. Two things are in order; first, tease Shinji mercilessly. Second, congratulate him for doing the right thing.

Yes, Gendo has over the past twelve years attempted to be if not a father, but supportive, but at the same time Misato's the closest thing Shinji considers a mother.

Especially because his mother apparently turned out to be f___ing loopy.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Walking into the restroom, Shinji takes his position at the urinal, unzipping and relieving himself.

"We should talk."

In the mirrored surface of the urinal's infrared receptor, he sees his father beind him.

"That was funny or scary for the first three years," Shinji says, finishing and zipping, "Now it's weird."

"It embellishes my image," Gendo Ikari says, not moving from his position as Shinji washes his hands, "You seem to be under the impression I am manipulating you and Doctor Sohryu as a hobby."

"Are you?"

"Manipulating? Yes. You are used to this by now. But I am not doing it as a pet project. There is a reason for it."

Shinji rolls his eyes, walking out of the bathroom, Gendo following.

"You are concerned with her well being," Gendo says, walking beside Shinji, "Perfectly understandable. Your relationship with her has been complicated in the past. Your threatening me, which is something you have not done since the Thirteenth Angel, makes it obvious you are protective of her."

"You got her drunk so she would throw herself at me," he says, spinning on him, "What is this? A test of character?"

"More than that," he responds, "I picked Sohryu for a reason. She is as brilliant as her mother, if not moreso. She is capable and intelligent in the workings of an Evangelion, but also very, very unstable. However, since both incidents, her emotional state has stabilized."

"And?"

"In two weeks, Ariel Zeppelin Sohryu will be as old as Doctor Sohryu was when she walked in on her mother's suicide," Gendo explains, pushing his glasses up his nose, "Remember that this is a defining moment in Doctor Sohryu's emotional development. What is your opinion of her as a parent?"

"She's done a better job than most everyone here."

Gendo grins.

"And you have told her that much," he responds, "Now, if you will excuse me."

He turns on his heel and walks into the nearest lift, pressing the button for his office. As he disappears, Shinji mutters to himself, walking back to his office. He doesn't see the two blue eyes watching from the corner.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Part of the problem of rebuilding the entire base out of a crystalline diamond structure is that the elevator tubes are transparent, no longer allowing the same concealment of the massive steel lift tubes of the Geofront Base. Many births were reported following the conclusion of the First Angel Wars, and much credit was given to NERV employees snooking in elevators.

Now that everyone can watch, there is a considerable decline in Hanky Panky when traveling through lift tubes.

This is foremost in Shinji's mind when he enters a tube as the day comes to its end and finds Asuka waiting for him. Smiling, he walks in, standing next to her.

"I saw you and your father, earlier," she says.

Eyes go slightly, wide, as she grabs his hand.

"It's the fact that everyone's watching that's preventing me from _riding you like a bicycle._"

"Yes, ma'am."

She grins, squeezing his hand. Even if that was in jest, there was meaning behind it. Twelve years ago, Shinji's defining character trait was fear of his father. Now, on the other hand, now that is gone. He smiles sheepishly back at her as she leans against him and wraps an arm around her shoulders.

The rest of the ride is spent in silence.

*

*

* * *

*

*

As the shifts change, one person remains constant. Walking across the catwalk in the central chasm of NERV, Gendo Ikari stops, resting his hands on the railing as his eyes meet that of Unit 01.

"I wonder," he says, "I wonder if you are proud of what I've done with my life. If you care. I wonder which one of us was worse as a parent…me, for how I used him, or you for how you used us all."

As always, Unit 01 is silent. And checking his pocket watch, Gendo turns and walks back to his office.

*

*

* * *

*

*

They watched television after dinner, with Shinji helping her with an arts project her school is doing. By the time everything was done, both Asuka and Shinji were exhausted, and it was as Ariel left the bathroom that she found her mother and their neighbor dozing off on the couch. Her mother's head was resting on his shoulder, his arm around her. Whether they were talking or not, she can't tell, just that they are sleeping.

She hops up on the couch and kisses them both on the cheek, then skips off to her room to sleep.

*

*

* * *

*

*

She forgot lunch. She was too busy to make for them both, so she sent Ariel off with lunch and decided to get her own from the cafeteria. She has no idea what it is, some sort of soup that she's sure they feed the Evas, to, and resigned to her fate, sits alone at a table to nourish herself.

"Well, _hello_ there!"

Slamming her tray across from her, Misato gives off a wide, cheshire grin as she sits down. Asuka pauses in mid slurp/chew, and glowers, stabbing the spoon into the mysterious food.

"What do you want?"

"Well, tell me how it's going," Misato cheerily says, downing half a can of soda and belching, "How's my widdle girl? How's it going in Ritz's office?"

"Good to see eight years doesn't change your personality."

"And you still can't hold your liquor."

Asuka glares, face turning bright red.

"You…_heard?_"

"Most everyone on base heard," the older woman says, shoveling a mouthful of the gruel, "And not from him. So no spanking. Unless you're into that."

"I swear to God, I'm going to kill you."

Misato laughs, almost snorting some of the 'food.' Calming down, she leans on her hand, propping herself up on her elbow.

"So," she says, "Tell me about her."

"Who?"

"Ariel, of course," she responds, "You're gone for eight years, and you come back with a _daughter?_ And yes, I am of proper clearance to know the circumstances."

"Then do you-"

"Only the Commander, sorry. And he's not talking. Damn bastard makes everyone jump through hoops, not just you. And I understand Shinji's a positive male role model?"

Twisting her lip, Asuka narrows her eyes.

"I always had hopes for you two," Misato says, "You know, like that aggression you had towards him was a widdle bit of wuv disguised under violence."

"Thought you just wanted him for yourself," she responds, stabbing the spoon into the soup/pudding, "I'll have you know, Shinji has become far less perverted over the years, thankfully. As it is, he is being very…helpful."

"Ie, cooking for you two."

"Among other things," Asuka sighs, "Look…it hasn't been easy. It's a touchy subject."

"And I am among the latest in a chorus telling you that you're not your mother," Misato says, sipping her soda, "Haven't thought of bringing her to work, have you?"

"And let the Commander get in any distance of her? Gott, no."

Misato sighs, rubbing the bridge of her nose.

"Asuka, as many problems as we've had, you're the closest thing to a daughter I've ever had, so that makes Ariel the closest thing I have to a granddaughter. So can I please, at one point, convince you to bury the hatchet and let me meet her?"

Asuka sighs, looking down at the dish. Finally, relenting, she nods.

*

*

* * *

*

*

The lights are dimmed as Shinji enters his apartment. Clicking them on, he looks through his mail, kicking off his shoes as he sits down on the couch and clicks on the television. Asuka has a late night and Ariel's got a play date with the Suzuharas, so that leaves Shinji with his mind occupied by the ever present question he's had since Asuka explained to him her daughter's origins.

Who is her father?

Not as much father, other donor. Because it could literally be anyone. He's assuming it's a human, though, and mentally he starts narrowing the possible candidates.

A knock to the door breaks his concentration. Sitting up, he walks to the door, opening and finding nothing, no one. Just a whisper on the wind and some of his mail he forgot.

*

*

* * *

*

*

"NERV has a day care center. Ari's there so she can meet other kids her age and I'm going to give her a tour when I have lunch."

Walking through the hallway the next morning, Shinji nods as Asuka flips through reports on her PDA. He whistles as they walk, whistling a tune that's just recently come to mind for some reason.

"You should check on her, to," she adds, "Your schedule's more fluid than mine, and she also really likes you. The more she sees of _Mister_ Shinji, the happier she'll be."

"I find the girls really do throw themselves at me," he says with a grin, "They must like a taken man."

"Don't press your luck, _Third,_" she says with a rare, grin, poking him on the shoulder, "And my drunken antics aside, I'm not that desperate."

"Never accused you of being," he says, squeezing her hand, "I have some projects to check up on. Are we having dinner tonight?"

"I suck as a cook, so yes," she says, squeezing his hand back, "Bye."

They break off, Asuka walking down to her office as he walks to his.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Rubbing her temples, Ariel moans. Almost as soon as the sound leaves her mouth, there is someone there, at least someone familiar. As soon as the job was opened, Hikari Horaki-Suzuhara was chosen to watch over the many children of NERV employees, and she takes her job quite seriously.

"Ari? What's wrong?"

"…got a headache," the girl says, "Can I sit down?"

The woman nods, and the girl stumbles over to a chair by one of the crafts tables, rocking back and forth.

"Odd," Hikari says, walking to the phone and picking it up, dialing a number, "Asuka? Does Ariel have a history of headaches?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

"No, no. Well, maybe she should take a nap or take a break. She doesn't like being given too much to do."

Packing her displays and sheets in her briefcase, she nods, listening as she prepares for the latest in a series of meetings with the Commander. She has resisted the urge to give Ikari a piece of her mind, letting others do that for her instead.

"I know, I know. But I have to run. I'll be there as soon as this meeting's over. 'K, bye!"

Closing the phone, she groans. Hating having to put work above her child, she walks out.

*

*

* * *

*

*

"Let's see," Shinji says, pacing the office, "Red hair, blue eyes, obviously inherited from Asuka. If a Dummy Plug is created, it can either be based on a pilot and an Angel, or two pilots. What purpose would a Dummy Plug partially based on Asuka serve?"

He sits at his desk. Typing in ID, he quickly establishes a link with MAGI-3 in Berlin. Scrolling down the list of projects, he mutters something to himself, before taking out a scrap of paper and entering in Misato's ID.

She'll hate me for this, he thinks, But it has to be done.

A listing scrolls down. A listing of classified and re-classified projects which he looks through, until finally narrowing down on a single phrase:

PERFECTION.

Clicking it, a screen of dozens of children floating in amber liquid appears, and Shinji nods, calling up notes.

"Father: Classified to Throne-Level clearance," he says, "Mother: 2nd Child Sohryu, Asuka Langely. Purpose: Highest level natural intelligence aptitude with highest level natural sync ratio…so is it me?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Moaning, Ariel rocks back and forth in the chair, holding her head. Her moans are loud enough for the class to hear, as Hikari walks over, hands on Ariel's shoulders.

"Ari! What's wrong?"

"Head hurts," Ari moans, "Hearing something…"

"Hearing what?"

"Singing," Ari says, "It's singing to me! Where's my Mama?"

"She'll be right here," Hikari says, "I'll call her right now. What are they singing?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

"No, she doesn't look a thing like me," Shinji says, rubbing the bridge of his nose, "She looks almost exactly like Asuka. So who would it…"

The smile. Ariel has a smile completely unlike Asuka's. While Asuka's is hesitant, practical, the smile that Ariel has is warm, genuine, and inviting. A smile that does not hold anything back, a smile that welcomes you. Yes, she is a child. Yes, her mother has admittedly spoiled her.

But he knows that smile. He knows that sile from somewhere, and…

"Oh," he whispers, eyes snapping open, "Oh my God. I know who Ariel's father is!"

*

*

* * *

*

*

"I…I don't know," Ariel screams, eyes wide, "It…it…"

"Sound it out," Hikari says, turning to one of the other attendants, "Get me Doctor Sohryu! _Now!_"

She turns back to the girl, stroking her hair as Ariel begins crying clawing at her head.

"Just sound it out," she says, "Hum it, please."

"Ah…ah…bah bah bah bah/bah bah bah bah/bah bah bah bah ba baba…"

*

*

* * *

*

*

He runs. Running down the hallway, jumping stairs faster than the lifts could take him, Shinji skids to a stop in Asuka's office, finding it empty.

"Shit," he snaps, seeing papers and a folder gone, and runs out.

Running into a lift, he skids to a stop, jamming the button for his father's floor.

"This is bad. This is really really _bad!_"

*

*

* * *

*

*

"I know that song," one of the attendants says, the young woman sitting next to Hikari as another trying to negotiate with the Commander's secretary on the phone.

"Really," Hikari asks.

"Yeah. It's classical music. I think Beethoven made it."

Hikari turns to her, slowly. Pursing her lips, her mind clicks off information she remembered, especially from things she heard Shinji talk about. And her eyes go wide when she realizes exactly what the song was.

"The Ode to Joy."

*

*

* * *

*

*

Vaulting over the secretary's desk, Shinji shoulder rushes the door to his father's office, skidding to a stop as Asuka, Misato, and Gendo stare at him. Hands on his knees, wheezing, he holds up a hand to hopefully silence any complaints.

"I hope there is a good reason for this," the Commander says, as Asuka clicks off the projector set up next to her.

"Damn good one!" he yells, "Asuka, I know who Ariel's father is! We have to get her out of the base, _right now!_"

The phone rings. Gendo picks it up, listening. His eyes snap open, the Commander standing up as something begins to move. Which is when they notice that the small glass of water on the Commander's desk is beginning to ripple. To shake.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Ariel screams. Holding her head, she screams, and the room screams in response. Hikari shouts for everyone to get out, the attendants rushing the children out as the chairs begin to shake and the walls begin to peel. The matriach of the Suzuhara clan stays to the last, as Ari opens her eyes.

Eyes that are blood red.

*

*

* * *

*

*

"Get her out of there," Shinji says, "Get her out of there right now! She's going to react with the entire base and we're in _deep trouble!_"

"This isn't good," Misato says, as the water glass finally shakes off the desk and shatters, "Someone get me a report! Are we having structural issues?!"

The entire room lists. Asuka grabs onto Shinji, turning him to face her.

"What did you find out," she whispers, "Who? Who is it?"

And every alarm begins to sound. Alarms they have not heard in more than a decade.

"Ariel's father," he says, "Is _Kaworu Nagisa._"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Rising into the air, Ariel screams. Eyes glowing, Hikari finally scrambles out, as the walls crack and she begins to glow and-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

**WARNING!**

**AT FIELD DETECTED!**

**BLOOD PATTERN TYPE BLUE: CONFIRMED**

**19****TH**** ANGEL: CONFIRMED**


	7. Little Angels

A pulse of light, followed by a shockwave that rocks the entire NERV base, as every alarm that has not been used in twelve years comes to life with a terrifying roar. Every system goes to alert as the readings come back positive, signalling the return of creatures long since passed.

"Give me a report!" Misato yells, running into the raised platform of Central Dogma as the technicians click off numbers, holographic displays lighting up.

"Angel has been reported on Level B-14," Rei says, standing at attention on the center platform, "AT Field strength comparable to the 17th Angel. We have difficulty getting a clear image."

"Sending tight beam transmissions-"

"Unit 03 is active, extending AT Field…"

"Transmission coming through!"

The screen blinks, fizzing out before reforming. Parts of the day care center rotate below, pulled up in the moments of awakening. The walls are shifting, the corpse of the Fifth Angel moaning in sympathy.

And at the center of the light is a five year old girl.

"No."

Everyone turns as Doctor Sohryu stands, frozen on the bridge. Her eyes are wide, her body shock still, staring at the image of her daughter.

The 19th Angel.

"No," she whispers, knees shaking, "No no no no no _no no_ _no NO!_"

Mouth hangs open for a moment, and Misato moves to Asuka, pulling her close as Rei stares at the readouts before turning to Katsuragi.

"The Angel is inside the base," Rei says, "Unit 03 and 09 have been activated and mobilized and-"

A pair of hands grab Rei by the front of her uniform. Staring into Sohryu's eyes, she sees something in them she hasn't seen in twelve years.

"That isn't _AN ANGEL!"_

Fury.

Pure, righteous, fury.

"That is _my DAUGHTER,_" she screams, "You are _not_ hurting her!"

"Doctor Sohryu is correct."

Everyone turns, as at the top platform, at the newly risen desk, Commander Ikari tents his hands and looks down upon his kingdom.

"The Angel is to be retrieved, unharmed," he says, "Pilot Suzuhara, these are your orders…"

*

*

* * *

*

*

With every pulse of power coming from the Angel, the walls sing. A terrible, sad song, the last traces of the Fifth Angel reacting in sympathy to its newly awakened kin. Her form has not changed, but the air around her has, becoming a circle of light, branching into rings surrounding the small form.

And within the Form, the mind of Ariel Zeppelin Sohryu screams. She screams for her Mama. She screams for her father.

"And so you have called me," the pale man says, floating before her in the dreamscape, "Ah, so you are my child. They created you to replace both your parents, didn't they?"

She looks up. They sit in a green field, strewn with rubble and dreams. She sits on a stray piece, one made up almost like half a human face, like half of Miss Ayanami's face, as she stares at the boy just a few years older than her.

"Are…you my Daddy?" she asks.

"I am," he says, "My name is Kaworu Nagisa. I am the other donor with which the scientists created you."

"No!"

He raises an eyebrow, hands in the pockets of his black dress pants.

"I'm sorry?" he asks.

"You're not!" she screams, "You're not my Daddy!"

"If I'm not…then who is?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Legs burning as he runs full tilt through the hallway, Shinji's eyes are dripping tears and face pouring sweat as the base continues to shudder. He was told that he was needed on the bridge. He was told that he needed to coordinate response with the JSSDF.

And Shinji told them to go f___ themselves, because he had a _job to do._

**-**

**-**

**Chapter 7: Little Angels**

**-**

**-**

"Subject is causing a sympathetic reaction to the base," Rei says, as the screens begin to flicker, one by one, "If this continues for too much longer, it may resurrect the Fifth Angel."

The entire bridge lists. Misato grabs onto Asuka, holding her tight as the bridge technicians scream, a display of one of the four main support struts appearing, showing cracks down the surface.

"AT Field extending," a bridge bunnie shouts, "We're seeing levitation in the base!"

"Give me a damn strategy!" Misato shouts.

"_This is Touji,"_ the voice announces over the speakers, "_I think that strategy just presented itself! Moving in with the package!_"

"Package," Asuka shouts, "What _package?_ What are you doing to…"

The screen shifts again. It shifts to a helmet mounted cam of Unit 03, or in particular the figure in Unit 03's palm.

"Oh, you _stupid bastard._"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Minutes earlier:

In the Entry Plug, Touji grimaces. There is no getting out of this one. The Angel has been positively identified as Ariel Zeppelin Sohryu, and as much bad blood as there is between him and her mother, he never thought he'd have to be called upon to hurt, or maybe even kill her daughter.

His stomach churns at the possibility, as he urges Unit 03 onward, Unit 09 and Unit 11 chiming in their status as the three ready to flank her, and-

"_TOUJI!_"

Turning the head of his chariot, he looks down. On a raised platform outside the Project E labs, Shinji waves his hands over his head.

"Shinji?" he asks, "Shinji, what are you doing out here?"

"_Pick me up! I know how to save Ari!"_

_*_

_*_

_

* * *

_

*

*

Even with what seems like walking speed, the Evangelion moves at over sixty miles an hour. Wind in his face, he soon sees the glowing sphere, soft white reflecting off the surfaces of the dead, maybe not all dead, Angel. At the center of the light is Ariel, and she is holding her head and screaming. Screaming for her mother.

Screaming for her Daddy.

"Come on," he whispers, "Don't let me down. Don't let me down, now."

"_Extending AT fields,"_ Touji sounds off, "_Dogma, tell me if we're doing anything!_"

The eyes of the three Evangelions glow, and the white begins to recede, compress. It pulses against them, it shudders, and the groaning of the dodecehedron begins to slow and quiet. Nodding, Unit 03 extends its hand foreward, Shinji shielding his face against the light as his hands come against the sphere, and-

*

*

* * *

*

*

"So you're here. I thought she was thinking of you."

Standing in the field, Shinji blinks, looking around. Coming face to face with the pale boy, his face splits into a grin.

"Kaworu?"

"You have grown, Shinji Ikari," Kaworu Nagisa says, his smile a mirror of the child's, "The boy I knew would never risk himself like you just have. At least, not on purpose."

"I have something to risk my life for," Shinji says, placing his hand on Kaworu's shoulder. Smiling, he steps forward. Tears dry on the girl's face as their eyes meet, and Ariel Zeppelin Sohryu cries out in joy as she rushes into his arms.

"She was crying for you," Kaworu says, "Crying for her Daddy."

"I'm not her father," Shinji says, turning from the girl to him.

"I never said you were," Kaworu responds, "But you _are_ her Daddy."

His mouth opens for a moment, closing. Smiling, he nods, turning to the girl. He goes down to one knee in front of her, hands on her shoulders.

"Do you really think I'm your Daddy?" he asks.

She nods, reaching out and hugging him.

"Please," she whimpers, "Mama's so lonely. She's so sad. Everyone she tries to make my Daddy runs away all the time."

"I won't," he says, pressing his lips to the top of her head, "I won't. I swear I won't. I won't leave you. You know why?"

She whimpers.

"None of them were ever good enough for you," he says, "None of them were ever good enough for your Mama. She's very worried right now, because you're in a lot of danger, and so am I, because I came for you."

He holds her at arms length, looking her in the eyes.

"Ariel," he says, "We have to go."

"My head hurts," she moans.

"I know. I know. But I can help you."

"I hear singing. It hurts. The singing hurts, an…"

Hands in his pockets, head rolled back, Kaworu begins to hum. It is soft, and steady, and beautiful. Taking the cue, smiling, Shinji does as well. Eyes going wide, a small smile returning to her face, so does she. And as all three hum the 'Ode to Joy;' the green field begins receeding…

*

*

* * *

*

*

"AT Field's diminishing," one of the technicians calls out, "Definite reaction! Psychograph is starting to stabilize!"

Hand squeezing Asuka's shoulder, Misato turns to Rei.

"Are we out of the danger zone, yet?"

"Not entirely," Rei responds, "As long as her S2 organ is active, Ramiel will respond."

"Great," Misato swears, "Touji! Get them out of the base!"

"_Wish I could, boss, but I'm sort of stuck like this!_"

Hands clasped together, as if in prayer, tears run down Asuka's face. Now it is not just her daughter in danger. _He_ went, as well, _he_ is risking himself to save her. If they lose now, they lose both of them.

"_AT Field deployed!_" a technician calls out, "It's…it's coming from the Graveyard!"

*

*

* * *

*

*

The ground shakes with a roar. In a blur, it bursts through the ground, through the armor of the base, a red, white, and green streak of motion. Four eyes glowing white, it surrounds the sphere, the orange field flashing around it and its cargo for a moment, severing Unit 03's hand as the pilot gives off a littany of curses before the new arrival falls backwards, through the armor and crystal and crashing onto the ground outside.

Opening its hands, Shinji looks up into the face of Evangelion 02, the first Combat-rated Evangelion and the former steed of Asuka Langely Sohryu. It tilts its hands, Ariel levitating between them as the monster's eyes glow and she screams…

And a pinprick of light escapes the girl, traveling into the palms of the monster before her eyes roll up and she screams. And with a flash of light, she drops, Shinji rushing and catching her. On his knees, her looks over her face, tilting her chin to face him.

She smiles, tears streaming down her cheeks. Her eyes are blue once more.

"I called for my Daddy," she says, voice cracked, tired, "You came."

"If you want me to be your Daddy, I guess I am," he says, a tired, relieved smile on his face, "I know better than to argue with a Sohryu."

"_ARI!_"

Running down the ramp, well ahead of any personnel and researchers and security, Asuka closes the distance, falling to a stop in front of the two of them. She doesn't even afford Unit 02 a glance, her face dripping tears and eyes puffy and red as she cups her daughter's face.

"Oh God, Ari," she cries, pulling her into an embrace, "Oh God, oh God don't you _ever_ do that to me again…"

Reaching out, she lightly, playfully smacks Shinji on the face. He grins, head bowed, before gathering mother and daughter into a hug.

"That goes for you, to," she moans, "You _stupid bastard._ What possessed you to go and do that?"

"Seemed like a good idea," he says with a chuckle. Reaching out, she grabs him by the collar.

And pulling him close, she kisses him on the lips as Ariel rests her head on her mother's shoulder. They stay like that for a long, long while. Watching over them, the newly regenerated Unit 02 falls to one knee and waits.

*

*

* * *

*

*

The holographic form of Maya Ibuki floats in front of them. Her hair grown out to her shoulders, her NERV uniform traded for a dress suit and labcoat, she holds a holographic cup of holographic coffee in her hand, as it is well past midnight at MIT.

_"The good news is, Ariel no longer has any danger of a Megascale Metatalent Manifestation,_" she says, "_That light show when Unit 02 had her was Unit 02 absorbing her S2 organ. All Angelic traits won't have enough power to manifest, at this point. The only side effect was that the S2 organ was located where the Appendix is, so she won't need an appendectomy._"

Pacing, as she has done for the past two hours since they arrived with Ariel, Misato nods.

"What's the bad news?"

"_The bad news is that this means Unit 02 is fully active with an S2 organ,_" she responds, _"I'd keep it on freeze or well restrained if I were you. How is Asuka taking it?_"

"Shaken, but fine. Shinji's with her, and he'll take them home."

On the other side of the world, in Boston, Maya grins.

"_Good for them._"

Outside the lab, where the girl sits, watching them, there is a commotion. A security guard protests that, no, they can't go in, she's under observation. The comment is met by an impact of a knee to an unmentionable place and the guard moaning about his balls.

The door opens to the lab, and Shinji walks in, waving and picking up the girl.

"We're talking her home," he says, "Asuka's taking out her frustrations on security."

Behind the glass, Misato waves, turning back to Maya.

"Yeah. This is why pilots don't live with me, anymore."

*

*

* * *

*

*

Heels click and clang on the metal of the Cage catwalks, as the chief of Section 1 walks to view the newest resident. For a moment, she believes it is staring at her. It may be, after all. It may be watching her. But for right now, she doesn't care. For the first time in a very long time, she doesn't care. Not about this.

"Hi," she says, "It's been a while, Mama."

Asuka braces her hands on the catwalk, watching the red form of her once faithful companion and chariot. Shaking her head, she meets its eyes with her own.

"You have unlimited power, now. You're probably fully aware…you have to be, to act on your own like you did. So you can hear me, can't you? It's me. It's your daughter. I thought we should talk."

The Evangelion says nothing. As always, it remains silent, unwavering. Uncaring.

"One good act does not make up for the rest," she continues, "I know…I know twelve years ago, you reached out to me. But you never did before. You hid, even when I needed you the most. When the Angel _raped my mind,_ you hid. When the MP Evas…violated me…you hid."

Wiping away the tears with her scarred right hand, she braces herself. Looking up, she continues.

"I'm a mother, now," she says, "Even if I didn't give birth to her, even if I never planned on her, I am a mother. That's who you saved, you know? You saved your grand daughter, today."

The doors behind her open, but she continues. Smiling, a forced, painful smile, she looks up at the face of her mother's form and continues.

"She will be the same age I was when I walked in on you," she says, "When I found you swinging from the ceiling with the doll you thought I was. I named her after you, Mama, just so I would never become what _you_ became. Her name is Ariel Zeppelin Sohryu."

Turning on her heel, she begins walking towards the door, Shinji and her sleeping daughter waiting.

"And you are never going to see her again."

*

*

* * *

*

*

The drive home was silent. The Section 2 agent said nothing, a large man with a crew cut who drove them slowly through Tokyo-3. Ariel slept on his lap, as Asuka stared out the window during the whole trip, in the back seat of an armored van.

He saw the last moments of it, Asuka declaring her contempt for the mind of her mother, imprisoned in Unit 02. That is their complexity and their curse, that they have to find their way in the world as parents despite such absences in their lives when they needed them the most. Him, abandoned at a train station. Her, walking into a moment repressed for the rest of her life.

Upon reaching home, the sun was already setting. Silently, patiently, he walks behind her, carrying the child, cradling her the way he should, the way a father should. No words were said as he laid the child down on her bed, tucked her in, and kissed her on the forehead. She moaned something and smiled, curling up into a ball as she fell into exhausted sleep.

He closed the door to her bedroom behind him, leaning against it. Asuka is waiting for him, watching him. Her black blouse is wet with her tears, her lab coat draped over one of the chairs. Bowing his head, he smiles, as she does.

"I should go," he says, "We might be called in, tomorrow."

"We might," she says, "I…Shinji…"

"You don't have to thank me," he says, taking her hand and squeezing it, "She's a precious little girl. I couldn't let you lose her."

He tries to move, but finds he can't. Her hand wraps tightly around his, as he stares into her deep, blue eyes and she smiles.

"She called out for her Daddy and you came," she says, "Would your father do that for you?"

"He already did," he responds.

She nods. A small understanding passes between them. He knows he will have to elaborate later, some day. Somehow. But for now, that is all that needs to be said. He turns to move, but finds he can't. Not because she is holding, but because of her face, her look. The silent pleading on her lips, which she finds she cannot voice.

"Asuka," he says, "I…have to go?"

A question, not a statement. That is all she needs to hear.

"Stay," she whispers.

Hand in hand, she leads him into the bedroom.

*

*

* * *

*

*

The lights were out, but a thunderstorm started shortly after. With flashes of lightning illuminating the room, he could see her. Their hands were intertwined, and he was on his back the entire time. In the lightning-light, he could not see her scars.

He could only see her. He could only see her as she did what she needed to do. Only see the light in her eyes, the words on her lips, the tracings of their fingers against their hands as they were quiet, not just because of the child in the next room but because it did not _have_ to be loud, and wild, and sweaty, and awesome.

But it was that last. It was truly awesome for them. As the thunder and lightning turned to rain, as her motions atop him ceased, as her naked form lay down next to him on the bed, he wrapped an arm around her bare waist and pulled her close.

Words are not said for a long moment, as she curls up, draping her arm around his chest. She traces it, stopping at the small, rough spot at the center of his chest. Where the original Lance entered Unit 01 twelve years ago.

"Thank you," she whispers.

He pulls her in, hand wrapping around the back of her head and kissing her.

"Least I could do," he whispers, "Are you alright?"

"Am I your first?" she asks.

He nods.

"Damn," she whispers, "Because you're not mine."

She presses herself closer to him, as he pulls the covers over.

"Back in college," she says, "A year after I left here. I got drunk one night. Really drunk. I don't know with who, who took advantage of me. I had…problems, had problems, all the scars and just wanted…I just woke up, and knew. I stopped drinking after that, just so…you know?"

He nods, kissing her on the forehead, on the nose. He holds her closer, thinking of ways he could find out who, and make them _suffer._

"How come we never did this years ago?" she asks.

"We weren't ready," he says, squeezing her hand, "I think it took Ari to get us ready for this. If we admitted our feelings twelve years ago, who knows?"

"What if," she mutters, "What if. What if we were better? What if we were sane?"

"What if our mothers weren't nuts," he says, "What if my father didn't take years and years to not be a bastard?"

He chuckles, as does she, leaning her head onto his shoulder as she begins to drift off into sleep. And as she does, his eyes snap open, and he realizes it for the first time.

"Oh, that _son of a bitch._"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Gendo Ikari looks up from his newly restored desk just as Shinji walks in, stopping in front of the desk. Bracing his hands on it, he stares his father in the eye…and smirks.

"You knew Ariel's father was the Seventeenth Angel," he says, "You knew she had the potential to awaken as an Angel sometime in the near future."

"Correct."

"So you had Asuka brought here, with her daughter, to have that awakening under controlled circumstances. You also made sure to send me to recruit Asuka because of our history, because I've learned enough of playing people from you in order to convince her to come."

"Also correct," Gendo says, tenting his hands.

"I'm not finished," Shinji says, "You recommended a restaurant with a good wine list. You made sure she got drunk so she would see I wouldn't take advantage of her. You made sure she moves into the apartment next to me. To drive the point home, you got her drunk again. She begins to trust me. As I stay around, Ariel starts to look up to me as a father figure, specifically calling out for me when she awakens. So when she has her episode, _I_ am able to calm her down enough so she can be stopped without hurting her."

Gendo inclines his head. Underneath his hands, he smiles.

"Why?" Shinji asks.

"As of now, there is an extra, completely viable Evangelion," Gendo explains, "Both you and Doctor Sohryu are here for the duration. No casualties have been reported over the course of this entire episode and more importantly, NERV was not required to murder a five year old girl."

Placing his hands on the desk, he begins filing through email.

"You did this all to save the life of a little girl?" Shinji asks, eyebrow raised.

"And/or to finally pair you up with someone," Gendo responds, "If I get grandchildren out of this deal, I would not terribly mind."

Shinji stares at his father, and finally, relenting, he sighs.

"You're a very weird person."

"Wouldn't have it any other way."

Waving him off, Shinji turns and walks out the door. And sitting back in his chair, Gendo Ikari grins.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Kensuke Aida looks up from the menu, spotting her as she walks towards the table he reserved for the both of them. She is in a black dress going down to her knees, thick straps over her shoulders. She looks…comfortable, like that. Placing her purse on the table, she sits down across from him.

"They have a nice vegan menu," he says, "Heard you had a busy day, yesterday."

"Yes," Rei says, "Doctor Sohryu's daughter turned out to be an Angel."

He stares at her, and rolls his hand for her to elaborate.

"Inspector Ikari calmed her down," Rei continues, "The girl was unharmed. He can give you further details on the matter, should he at some point exit Doctor Sohryu's apartment."

Kensuke chokes on his water at the last statement, raising an eyebrow as he stares at her.

"Say _what?_ Well, can't say I'm surprised…"

"Is this necessary?"

He starts, putting the water down.

"Is what necessary?"

"The date," she responds, "Why do you insist on taking me to places like this?"

He opens his mouth, and closing it shrugs. Sighing, he reaches out, taking her hand in his own.

"It seems nice," he responds, "I guess I want something out of this."

"As do I. I wish to procreate. What do you wish?"

"Rei, if you get pregnant, it's my kid," he says, "I'm going to be there to help raise him. And besides which, I…"

He scratches his had with his free hand. He laughs, a little, happy laugh which makes her cheeks flush red for a moment. She quickly sips her water, but finds said heat has not left her.

"I…am unsure," she says, "What do you seek from this?"

"Why did I agree to it in the first place?" he asks, "Rei, you're…Rei, have you ever gone on a date before? Before I started taking you out?"

"No," she whispers, "No, I have not."

"You've been through college, and high school, and never…you never did? Why not?"

"It was not necessary," she responds, eyes avoiding his, "Why do you insist on doing this with me?"

"Because you're worth it," he says with a smile, "Because I've kind of fantasized about this since I was fourteen."

Her eyes snap open. She pulls her hand away, taking her purse.

"I should go," she says, and walks out.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Confusion, fear. Feelings she is not used to, as she walks from the restaurant. Her mind whirs, spinning as she walks quickly down the streets of Tokyo-3 in the dead of night, clutching her purse to her like it held the answer she _needs._

He said he liked her. She is…she is not sure. She believes she does as well, and she chose him, after all. She chose him and he is an acceptable subject for…

Well, she has no idea where she is, now. The buildings are run down, broken. She spots her old apartment building, before Third Impact and Katsuragi taking her in. She sees the old tenements and garbage…and sees that she is not alone. Two people are here, and she is surrounded.

Dirty, greasy, they are circling her. Grinning at her, not pleasantly. Talking amongst themselves about how she took a wrong, _wrong_ turn somewhere, and they can help her out. For a price.

Her arm darts out, hitting one in the chest, jamming his breastbone as he gasps before she swings her purse into his face and sends him spinning to the ground. Turning, the other has already closed the distance, grabbing her and slamming her face first against the brick wall, stunning her as he locks her arm behind her. She whimpers, eyes snapping wide. Fear. Definitely fear.

"Bad move," he whispers in her ear, "Lady, you have no idea how much trouble you-"

He collapses. Another hand grabs her, turning her around.

"Are you alright," Ken asks, "Rei, did they hurt you?"

He's holding a baseball bat, cracked, in his other hand. He is sweating, eyes frantic. He followed her from the restaurant, found her.

Saved her. She wraps her arms around him, his own encircling her.

"Take me home," she whispers.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Door unlocks, and they stumble in. She removes her shoes, stumbling towards the small, comfortable couch by the well used television, bracing against it as Ken turns on the lights.

"Thank you," she whispers.

He says nothing, walking to her cabinets, taking out a wad of medical tape and gauze, wetting it with rubbing alcohol. He walks to her, touching it against her face and she winces. He nods, dabbing it, the cut on her face from when she hit the wall stinging, but healing.

"Will you stay?" she asks.

"Rei, you were almost raped," he says, voice just above a whisper, "No. No, not tonight. I'd be taking advantage of you."

"As I have of you," she whispers.

She leans, their foreheads touching.

"I'm sorry if I scared you," they both say at the same time. Silently, he brings her closer. A slight, steady hug, her eyes closing as she relaxes against him. He is…nice to the touch. No longer scrawny, years of directing and running having given him a level of tone. She already knows that, of course.

"I should go," he says, "Can we talk, later?"

She nods, pressing her face against his shoulder as he slowly lowers her to the couch.

He walks out, closing and locking the door behind him.

Rei Ayanami, tactical operations director of NERV-1, sits in the darkness for some time after.

*

*

* * *

*

*

In his office, Commander Ikari clicks off the display. He looks across the office to the sole other occupant, sitting in the chair, her legs crossed. Adjusting her glasses, pulling a bang of graying blonde hair out of her eyes, she smiles a small, knowing smile.

"Phase three," he says.


	8. Grandfatherhood

The doorbell rings at the Sohryu apartment the next afternoon, and cheerfully, as always, Ariel skips down the hall and swings the door open. Blue eyes meet red eyes, and Ariel tilts her head and smiles as she greets the new arrival.

"Hello," she says, clasping hands at her waist, "How can I help you?"

The young albino woman in the pressed NERV uniform regards the child, who not twenty four hours ago had Evangelions sicked on her, and raises an eyebrow.

"I am looking for Inspector Ikari," she says, "He is not in his apartment, and I presume he is here."

"Rei?"

Peaking his head out from the kitchen, Shinji spots Rei and waves.

"Ariel, she can come in. It's my sister."

Ariel steps aside, allowing Rei entrance, as the Operations Director walks in as Shinji exits the kitchen, still in an apron and wiping off his hands.

"Rei, what can I do for you?" he asks.

"Is Doctor Sohryu here?"

"She's going to be back later. She's running tests on Unit 02, and…well, I think she's still not exactly happy with you. What do you need?"

"Yeah, what _does_ she need?"

Standing in the doorway of the apartment, arms folded and eyes narrowed, Doctor Asuka Langely Sohryu, head of Section 1, taps her foot. Ariel has quickly vacated back to the kitchen, partly to help with dinner and partly because she _knows_ better than to be around when Mama's pissed.

"Doctor Sohryu," Rei says, "I wished to speak with Inspector Ikari regarding a personal situation."

"Tough. Outside, Wondergirl."

Rei nods, walking out the door, followed by Asuka. Looking up, Shinji sighs, walking back into the kitchen.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Any shouting match with an introverted Nephilem is especially one sided, as there is a handful, perhaps, of situations where Ayanami has raised her voice in the full extent of her life.

The problem with these situations is that this usually then degrades into a fist fight, and recently it was proven that both can hold their own. The argument is about the expected subject:

Rei ordering the death of Asuka's daughter as an Angel.

Asuka is not subtle about her feelings on the matter, and during mid statement, something about her test tube being shoved up somewhere that it should not fit, she grabs Rei by the uniform front, prompting Rei to place her hand on the base of Asuka's jaw.

"Neither of you have the advantage. Rei's nerve strike would still leave Doctor Sohryu enough time to give a return punch."

Both women freeze as the new arrival steps out of the elevator. Hands thrust in his pockets, box under his arm, he waits for a moment, before reaching up and pushing his amber glasses up his nose.

"Are you done?" Gendo Ikari asks.

They break off, standing at attention.

"Sir," they both respond.

"Good. Rei, what are you doing here?"

"I have a personal matter that requires Inspector Ikari's input," she responds, "Why are you here, Commander?"

A small smirk crosses his face. Asuka grimaces, knowing what is to come next.

"I simply wished to meet my potential grand daughter."

**-**

**-**

**Chapter 8: Grandfatherhood**

**-**

**-**

The door knocks once again.

"I'll get it!"

She runs out of the kitchen, skids to a stop in front of the door, and swings it open. There are advantages to having a five year old girl on call, Shinji considers, as he examines the pot of soup, And among them are-

"You must be Doctor Sohryu's daughter."

The ladel drops, and Shinji sprints out of the kitchen. Taking a moment to get his bearings and assume that the situation is not a fever dream or extended post-coital hallucination, he locks eyes with his father as Ariel beams.

"That's right," she says, "I'm Ariel Zeppelin Sohryu! What can I do for you?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Deep within the bowels of NERV, something stirs. It began, in retrospect, over the previous day and a half, with the return of Unit 02 to full operational capacity. Of course, the problem is that Unit 02 has no pilot, as Doctor Sohryu has expressely and at length explained that they are _not_ getting her in an Entry Plug, and nor are they doing that to her daughter. The problem was that Unit 02 was activated, and not shutting off, and didn't intend to shut off, either.

And with all this free time, it's mind begins to wander.

The ghost-soul of Kyoko Zeppelin Sohryu, failed mother, failed wife, failed scientist, wanders in her malaise through the organic circuits of MAGI, wandering through dreams and programs as it looks through forbidden arcana and discarded projects.

She looks over the work of her daughter, her bright, beautiful, broken girl. She looks through videos of her in her office, of her at her home, of her running to embrace her daughter as _she, SHE, _saved the little girl and then she came back and spit in her face for all it was worth, that ungrateful-

Calm. Calm. She calms herself, spying an image of her daughter, her little brilliant Asuka, in bed with Ikari's spawn.

Flicking the images closed, she continues to wander, curious. No Angels, just Monsters now. She flits through the circuits, watching, waiting…and hears it. A sobbing, a distant sorrow. Gliding through electrical pathways and artificial nerves, she homes in on it, finding the Light at the center, a godlike conception in the form of a sphere, shutting out everything. Sensors, reality, gamma rays. Nothing can penetrate this, the Barrier of the Soul at greatest extension.

From inside the Sphere, she hears sobbing. Pressing her hands against it, extending her own Barrier, she peers through. She sees an empty, blasted field, once verdant and green but wasted by the fires of war and madness. She finds within it no signs of life, save one, in the form of a woman. A woman in a long white labcoat, sweater and skirt, looking not a day older than her day of death, curled into a ball and sobbing.

Miserable, alone, dejected, she has been crying for twelve years, drawn back into her own little reality.

In that moment, the soul of Kyoko Zeppelin Sohryu recognizes a kindred spirit, and forcing her own Barrier outward, enters the sphere. The other woman, startled by intrusion of her private Hell, looks up. Always the more outgoing, extroverted of the two, Kyoko begins.

"Yui?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

"This is wrong on so many levels."

Shinji nods, both out of knowing better than to disagree with Asuka and also out of agreeing. Ariel is getting her first chess lesson. From his father.

"I need to speak with Rei," he says, palming his face.

"Me first."

"By 'speak' you mean 'hit,' right?"

She purses her lips, nodding.

"She's doing her job, Asuka," he responds, watching as Ariel manages to outflank his father with one of her bishops, "You can't hold that against her."

"Of course I can. She sicked two Evangelions on my little girl," she says, teeth gritted, seething, "I'm going to hold that against her for the rest of her natural life, which will be something along the lines of an hour if I have any say."

"She's my sister."

"And she inherits a lot from your mother."

Rolling his eyes, he throws his hands up and walks back into the kitchen. Throwing the rag in his hand across the kitchen, he walks back to the stove, walking past the seated Rei as Asuka marches in after him.

"Just what's _your_ problem today," she shouts, "I have a good damn reason to be angry with her!"

"You are correct in that aspect," Rei calmly says, nursing her tea, "Had it been my child endangered, I would have reacted the same. I have recommended no disciplinary action be leveled for your outburst in Central Dogma."

"Damn straight you haven't!"

Asuka stops, and turns back to Rei.

"Wait, you haven't?"

"Your outburst was understandable," Rei responds, "In my quest for motherhood, I have examined and read how the acquisition of children affects the emotional outlook of the individual."

"Yeah, that makes sense," Asuka responds, shrugging as she walks to the fridge, "Hormones play with you and…"

She turns back to Rei.

"Your _what?_"

"I have embarked upon a quest to have children," Rei responds, "I have already selected a suitable male candidate in Mr. Aida."

Asuka stares at Rei. To call it 'staring', though, is to understate it. She levels her eyes on Rei as if Rei has sprouted a second head, a halo, wings, and spontaneously began generating a latin Choir in response to her every motion. She backs away, raising an eyebrow as she tries to process the exact wording given to her, and…

"Is this what you wanted to talk about?" Shinji asks.

Asuka whirls on him, pinning him with a look.

"You _knew_?"

"Of course I did. She's my sister."

"I told him the next day," Rei responds, "I fear Kensuke wishes for a relationship outside of fathering my future children."

Asuka gags, trying in vain to get the image of _Kensuke Aida having sex_ out of her head.

"How do you feel about that, Rei?" Shinji asks, turning back to the soup.

"I am unsure," Rei responds, "He is a capable partner in procreation, but I have found I am enjoying his company."

Swearing in German, Asuka marches out.

"I'm going to pay for that," Shinji sighs, "Probably not in a pleasant way, either. Rei, I'm not sure I can help you on the relationship front. My own isn't exactly…well, it isn't exactly normal."

"Has she been violent?"

"No, actually no," he says, scratching his head, "Actually…it's complicated. I've never seen myself as a father figure, but Ariel's latched onto me. In a good way. She's a really sweet little girl, and…"

"Combined with the mother present in your personalities, this serves as a measure of surprise."

He glares at her, before turning back to the stove and stroking the roasting fish.

"Thank you, Rei," he says, "I appreciate the occasional reminder of what sort of _f____ ups we are."

"That is true of everyone. I was at the heart of Instrumentality," she responds, tilting her head, "It revealed to me the inherent truth that everyone is f___ed up."

Shinji shrugs, doing his best to ignore her at this point. The food simmers as she sips her tea, before waiting for an obvious way to broach the subject.

"I believe I may have a level of affection for him," she says, "I was confused, last night. I wandered into a bad part of Tokyo-3, and he saved me. I believe I may…have feelings for him. I am worried."

"Ken's a nice guy," Shinji responds, suppressing a shudder at the situation, "I'll admit, he's a bit…weird…"

"But I am, as well. Weird."

"Admittedly. Rei, I can't say what exactly you need to do, just…you have to do what you feel is right. Does that help?"

Rei finishes the rest of her tea. Silently, she sits, watching as her brother, her guide to living, continues preparations for the family dinner.

"Not one bit," she says.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Chess set packed under his arm, Gendo Ikari walks out of the apartment, intent on going to the lift and then returning to his office. However, a certain redheaded maternal figure has already made her presence known, standing in his path with her arms folded and her expression not exactly pleasant and welcoming.

"Doctor Sohryu," he says.

"Commander," she says, "If I may ask, what the _hell_ do you want with my daughter?"

"Outside of the fact that she is a former Angel?" he asks with a small, knowing grin, "Doctor Sohryu, this was an intelligence test. Your daughter is highly intelligent and has an inherent grasp of logistics. But you know that, don't you?"

"Touch my daughter and I touch you _right back_," she growls.

"I also give it a few months until she becomes my grand daughter by marriage," he continues, "Or do you think I do _not_ notice your relationship with Inspector Ikari?"

"You mean _your son?_" she snaps, "Twelve _f___ing_ years and you can't even say it! If you treat your own flesh and blood like that, what gives you _any_ idea I'm letting you anywhere near _mine?!_"

He grins. It is not a pleasant sight, as he pushes his glasses up his nose.

"Will that be all, Doctor?" he asks.

She growls a particularly violent swear in German.

"Have a good day."

With that, he walks into the lift, and is gone. Yelling, she kicks the wall, cracking the plaster. Muttering under her breath, she walks back to the apartment, fuming, powerless, and angry.

*

*

* * *

*

*

"I have somehow managed to tick off everyone but you," Shinji says, sitting on the couch in his apartment. Sitting next to him, Ariel nods, as the argument, one sided, echoes through the walls.

"They argue like she does with Aunt Marie," Ariel says, leaning on Shinji, "Marie doesn't yell."

"That's because she knows better."

"Did Mama always have a temper?"

"That's…one way to put it," he says, sucking his teeth, hoping to not give too much information that she might parrot back, "Aunt Rei and your mother haven't always seen eye to eye. There's a reason for that, though. Does your mother let you have any dolls?"

Ariel shakes her head.

"Well, there's a reason why."

He sighs, slapping his knees, as the sounds of yelling die down. For a moment, they wait, listening, and as the door slams in the distance and heals click on the sidewalk, Shinji nods to the girl.

"We're done," Asuka says, walking into the apartment, "Rei's been apologizing like you used to."

"Good," Shinji says, "I know she's my sister, but what she did was out of line. Did she leave?"

"We also talked about her 'boyfriend' and that problem," she says, walking over and scooping up her daughter, "She's gone home to figure it out. Can I say your father's _not_ someone I want around?"

"He was nice," Ariel responds.

"No, Ariel, Commander Ikari is _not_ nice," Asuka says, pressing her index finger to her daughter's lips, "And Mr. Shinji is _nothing_ like his father."

"I wish I knew what he was thinking," Shinji sighs, rubbing the bridge of his nose, "He's been…I wouldn't say fatherly, but he's changed a lot over the years, except he still likes stringing us along. He put all this in place so Ariel would be safe, but I can't help but think he has some sort of agenda…"

"Shinji, he's Gendo Ikari. _Of course_ he has an Agenda."

She takes his hand, pulling him up.

"Now, let's eat."

*

*

* * *

*

*

"Um…ma'am, I'm sorry if we were overdoing it last night, but you did say be believable. My wife would be really ticked at me if she thought I was being untoward towards you."

The two undersirables shrug, as she purses her lips and narrows her eyes. It is more or less accepted that Section 2 can be lax, and especially those who operate as deep cover.

"You were over enthusiastic," she says, "I could have been injured."

They rub their heads, one of them holding an icepack to his face and the other bandaged around the chest. Neither look especially pleased with the situation, or their superior, who is so far above them they may as well offer sacrifices of grain and livestock.

"I got a baseball bat to the back of my head," the one on the left whines, "I think you forgot to tell him you were role playing."

"I did not intend to tell him."

They stare at her, turn to each other, then back at her. The one on the left sighs, slumping his shoulders. He's a veteran. He's used to this. Katsuragi had a reputation of using Section 2 as porter duty for the Second Child and for 'sweetening the pot' during her relationship with Agent Kaji.

"Are you serious?" he asks.

Rei Ayanami, tactical operations director for NERV-1, nods.

"This was a test to see what level of emotional attachment Mr. Aida holds for me," she says, pacing the room, "He has passed. He will be adequate as a protective parent. The current operation now moves onto the next phase. Are there any questions?"

The one on the right raises his hand.

"Yes?"

"Are you…I don't know…_insane?_"

*

*

* * *

*

*

"That's what worries me, man. I'm worried she's not approaching this like…like I don't know, a stable person would."

"Ken, I think we can well establish that Rei is as far from stable as we can safely entrust a weapon of mass destruction to."

"Amen."

Belch.

Touji, Kensuke, and Shinji, the stooges as they were called in the halcyon school years, sit at the table in the bar closest to NERV-1, watching the people go by. Shinji has thus far shown impressive willpower, having torn himself away from the 'woman', as Touji now refers to her as, to join his old friends in hearing Kensuke's current problem.

His sexy, sexy problem.

"Lemme get this straight," Touji says, "Rei Ayanami…_Rei Ayanami…_wants to use you as a breeding stud and you are _worried?_"

"I'm just glad it's not me," Shinji sighs, "My family's messed up enough as is."

"It's not that," Touji snaps, "It's…I had to save her life last night! She just walked out of dinner and got attacked and I…"

Shinji narrows his eyes turning to Touji. The jock raises his eyebrow, shaking his head.

"That don't make sense," he says, "You mean Rei got attacked?"

"Yes!"

"She can't," Shinji says, "Rei's tactical operations chief for NERV and she's a Pilot. Section 2's on her the entire time. There's no way anyone could get that close to Rei."

"And as Tactical Chief, Rei's kind of in charge of Section 2," Touji says, stroking his chin, "Man, heads are gonna _roll._ Misato's going to go on the warpath with an axe if she…if she…oh, _crap._"

"What?!" Kensuke screams, standing up, "What is it?! What's wrong?!"

Shinji sighs, and takes out his PDA, opening up a file and grimacing.

"Ken, you're going to want to sit down for this one…"

*

*

* * *

*

*

The apartment door swings open, and Shinji walks in, kicking off his shoes and clicking the light on. It's his first night back, and he intends to use his apartment for its chosen purpose.

Sleep.

"I'm home," he says.

He takes a step in, hanging up his jacket.

"Welcome home."

Head, palm. Repeat. Walking past the kitchen where the guest is sitting, he walks to the mail pile and files through bills.

"You'd be happier if I was Asuka," Misato says.

"I would, actually, but for different reasons."

"Meh, I'd let you stick it in me if you asked."

He gags, glaring at her. She shrugs, sipping her soda.

"Just saying. Save the world, get some ass. That's how I think it should work, but since Makato's moved to Tokyo-2, I ain't getting nookie. Unlike you, young man."

"Is this really the best time to talk about this?"

"Shinji, as your former guardian, _every_ time is the perfect time to talk about your sexual habits."

She tosses him a soda, missing his head by an inch when he catches it.

"To my little baby popping his cherry," she says, tipping the soda at him, "May you be fruitful and multiply."

Rolling his eyes, Shinji walks into his kitchen, opening the fridge to assess his groceries.

"You're a better dad than I'd give you credit for," she continues, "Still, I just got an inquiry about Section 2 from you. What's that about?"

"Misato…you don't want to know."

*

*

* * *

*

*

The fist pounds on the door. Knowing who it is, Rei slips on the nightrobe, loosely, and glides towards her front door, smiling as she swings it open.

"Yes?" she asks, seeing Kensuke…and Touji sitting on the railing, "I did not ask for him."

"You _set it up!_" he yells.

Her smile disappears.

"Well, shit," she says.

"Balls in your court, Ken," Touji says, waving at Rei, "Little lady's waiting for me."

He turns, thrusting his hands into his pockets, and walks off, whistling. They watch him go, before Ken turns back to her, still fuming.

"Fat lot of good he was," he says, "We need to talk. We need to talk right _now._"

She sighs, grabbing him by the shirt collar and pulling him in. Pulling him in, he does not protest, for he knows better at this point, and if he remains silent, he may get an explanation.

And sex.

In that order.

"The two assailants were Section 2," she says, pushing him down on the couch, "I wished to see you reaction."

"To you in danger," he asks, hands out, "For crying out…you could have been hurt!"

"They are professionals."

"Rei, that was…that was _stupid!_ That was stupid and manipulative and-"

She presses her index finger against his forehead. She smiles. It takes a good amount of fortitude to keep himself from soiling himself.

Fortitude which he has to spare, now. He isn't fourteen anymore, isn't the little boney nerd. Instead, he grabs her wrist, standing up and pulling her to him as she gasps, eyes wide. Impressed. Intimidated.

"Don't you _ever_ do that again," he growls, "It doesn't matter if it was real or not, I thought you were going to get hurt!"

He pulls her closer, squeezing her wrist as he narrows his eyes.

"What the Hell was this a test of?!"

Her voice is lost for a moment. Lost in the anger, lost in the outrage, lost in the…power behind the eyes. Oh yes, she thinks, this is _perfect. Phase three._

"If…if you would protect me," she whispers.

Eyes meet. Hearts pulse and beat. Dropping her wrist, he grabs her by the back of her head, pulling her to him, kissing her deeply, passionately, tongues intermingling as their arms wrap around each other and hands move down, around, digging-

*

*

* * *

*

*

In the office, Gendo Ikari raises an eyebrow, the woman behind him giving off an approving whistle.

"Wow," Ritsuko Akagi says, as he clicks the view of Rei's apartment closed.

"That was successful," he says, calling up financial reports.

"I would say so," Akagi says, walking to the chair in front of his desk and sitting down, "So, tell me, Ikari. You haven't given me a full answer yet, of just what your game is."

"You believe I have an agenda," he says with a small, dark chuckle.

"I know you well enough," she responds, "Until I met my spouse, I was quite involved with you, after all. I think I know you better than most do."

He nods, tenting his fingers with a small smile evident.

"My agenda is simple," he says, "I am aiming for one thing. Redemption."

*

*

* * *

*

*

There is a trail of clothing leading around Rei Ayanami's apartment. The apartment is a nice one. It was chosen by her when she reached adulthood and graduated college. Nice, white walls, a plush carpet, blue tiled bathroom, and a four post bed. Having spent fourteen years in squalor, she reasoned she could, in fact, treat herself.

And she has.

Because there is a trail of clothing leading through and around her apartment. It starts in the kitchen, with a pair of shoes and jacket (in particular where they made out on the kitchen chair, then used the counter in a way it was not meant to- check structural stresses), leading to the bedroom, where the robe and the shirt and pants are (although they got discarded midway through the visit- he was intent, did not disrobe) and the boxers and socks at the bathroom entrance (soap dish in the shower was kicked over, although the shower is more enjoyable with more than one person).

The trail of damp carpet leads back to the couch, where the two tired, exhausted, and quite satisfied young people are lying, towels wrapped around them, Rei resting on his lap as they laugh. He loves Rei's laugh. It is genuine, happy, warm. Her teeth show when she laughs, her eyes light up, maybe glow.

"Wow," he whispers.

"Mm," she moans, sitting up, nuzzling his neck, "That was…enjoyable."

"I'll take that as a compliment," he says with a grin, "No more tricks, alright? Did you think about what I said?"

She nods, sitting in his lap.

"I have," she says, "I have before you said it. The attack was not for you to defend me, but to defend the child."

He nods, taking her hands, pulling her closer.

"You said you could sense…"

She shakes her head.

"I am not with child," she says.

"Give it another try, then?"

She grins, wickedly, leaning forward and pressing her lips against his.

The towels hit the floor soon after.

*

*

* * *

*

*

In the Heart of failed Instrumentality, twelve years ago, the world was saved. It was not, as it is currently believed, saved by the actions of an emotionally scarred, frightened, introverted fourtreen year old boy. It was not from his boundless love for his sister and mother wrestled away from his insane father.

No, that boy was too busy. He had just spied the slaughtered remains of the girl he thought he loved. He was a broken shell. And his mother had offered him godhood, in exchange for his soul.

No, the world was saved by another hand. A hand wrapped in a white glove, gripping Yui Ikari's throat as behind amber glasses eyes pooled with raw, palpable rage as a primal scream escaped his lips. Words she had never, in a million years, thought she would ever hear. Words the boy hoped for his entire life.

"God _damn you,_" Gendo Ikari roared, "_Get away from MY SON!_"

*

*

* * *

*

*

And that is how the Bastard saved the world.

Two failed mothers sit on a rocky outcrop, watching the world go by. The scene is the one she had planned, and had to live with. A beach at a pool of red, not even water but blood. A deepening pit of human waste that she had planned to consign to humanity, but instead has consigned to those she worked against. They watch as the bloated still living carcas of Lorenz Kihl tries desperately to tread water, as he has for twelve years, before every time being dragged down by the purple Beast.

"Well, this _sucks,_" Kyoko says.

Yui says nothing. She has not said anything for twelve years, nothing understandable. She just watches, and cries. Does not fume, does not rage.

She has left all that behind. Now, for a change, she is the aimless one. She is the broken one. Sighing, Kyoko stands up, and grabs Yui by the crook of her arm.

"Come with me," Kyoko says, "We're going to visit your boy."


	9. Airing the Past

Upon the announcement, the young, dark haired woman's face turns red and her hands come up over her mouth to stiffle the gasp. Sitting back in her chair at her dinner table, Asuka sighs. It wasn't easy telling her friend about this, much less admitting that maybe, just maybe, she was going about this wrong.

"You and Shinji," Hikari says, pausing and looking about to find no children present, "Had _sex?_"

"Once," Asuka says, holding up her gloved right index finger, "Once. After he saved Ariel I just…I spilled my guts to him, I couldn't just…I couldn't just let him go."

She sighs, wrapping her arms around herself.

"I don't know," she says, "I don't know why I did it. I took him into my bedroom, and I…well, I did what I had to do. That's the only time. He stayed over the next couple of nights, and…well, we haven't done anything since."

"Oh, dear." Hikari says, "Oh dear oh dear. Why hasn't Touji said anything?"

"Because he's been a gentleman," Asuka says with a small grin, "Shinji, not Touji. He hasn't acted any different, you know? He hasn't gone parading around, with a 'I boned Doctor Sohryu' sign. He's…he's patient. I think…"

She trails off, looking down at her soup.

"What do you think?" Hikari asks.

"I think I pushed him too soon," she sighs, "And I think I may have just killed our relationship."

**-**

**-**

**Chapter 9: Airing the Past**

**-**

**-**

Twelve years ago.

With a start, she opens one eye, finding the other sealed. Frantic, she reaches with her left arm, her right heavy and numb, feeling the bandage over the eye. Pressing, she feels the orb, feels the softness, confirming that her eye is still there that _no they didn't pluck out her f___ing eye_-

"She's awake!"

Leaning over her, a young face framed by short black hair calls out for help. For a moment, she hopes, maybe, that it's him…and clearing her vision, sees that it's not, it's Akagi's assistant.

Good enough.

"Asuka," Maya says, "Can you understand me?"

She nods, throat dry, cracked. That's all they're getting out of her for right now.

"You were badly injured during the fight with the MP Evas," Maya says, "Shinji managed to get your plug out of Unit 02 before Unit 01 shut down. You're not out of the danger zone yet, but Misato will be down here soon."

She opens her mouth. Blinking back pain, gripping the sheets of the bed, she mouths a question.

"Shinji's down the hallway," Maya says, "He's…he's in his father's recovery room."

She nods, slowly. Understanding slowly dawns on her. Once again, she lost. Once again, she was beaten, humiliated. Once again, _he_ had to save her. She waits, waits until she leaves. Then lets the tears flow out of her good eye.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Time passes. In a month, she was passed to return home. Much of the city was totaled in the battle, including the Blastwave, as the failed Third Impact was called. Shinji had the honor of carting her like an invalid in her wheelchair, into the elevator up to their floor. She said nothing the entire time, hasn't said anything to either of them.

Of all the people he had to sit by the bedside of, he chose his _father._ The _bastard_ who caused this earned his sympathy, and not _her._

As they sat in the living room, Doctor Akagi came to visit, checking up on her. She confirmed that, yes, she could walk, and yes, they could remove the bandages. Scissors clipped carefully through gausse and tape, eventually freeing her, as she opened her eye and found that, yes, by some miracle she could see. It was blurry at a distance, and the Doctor said she would need a lens prescription, and…

And they were staring at her.

"Mirror," she whispers.

They pause. Shinji looks questioningly at Misato.

"Give me a mirror," she repeats.

Carefully, he hands the hand mirror to her. Clicking open the clamshell, she raises it to her face and sees her right eye. The blue is gone. The color drained out. All that is there now is _red._ Just like _hers._ Just like that _doll._

She stands up, shakily, grabbing the scissors from Akagi's hand and furiously cutting down her bandaged arm, pushing away Misato when she tries to stop her, snipping down the length and furiously tearing and pulling the bandages off. Her eyes go wide, her voice catching as she sees the jagged line of white, running down from her should to the middle of her knuckles, feeling along the almost insensate flesh as her voice warbles, before she lifts up her shirt and sees _them._ Circles of white, alabaster skin. One on her front for entry.

One on her back for exit.

Pulling up her pant legs, she sees the one on her knee, on her thigh, feeling the one on her neck. Feet unsteady, knees shaking, she stumbles, hands in her hair. Shinji approaches her, to calm her, but she lashes out, throwing the mirror at him as she screams, kicking the wheelchair across the living room, breaking her foot as she lunges down the hall and slams the bathroom door shut behind her.

*

*

* * *

*

*

"I didn't deal with it well," Asuka says, sipping her tea, "It's stupid, and childish, but so was I."

"You survived."

"And I was _ruined,_" Asuka says, waving off Hikari's response, "You remember, right? Remember when everyone came back after Tokyo-3 was rebuilt, and our first day of school?"

The other young woman nods, sighing. Airing the past has never been their strong point. Both carry too much baggage to simply let it all out, and for a long time, especially after the Impact, there was a malaise between them.

Hikari, innocent, trusting, never blamed them for Touji, especially because Touji didn't either. The jock was one of the first people back, sporting state of the art prothetics and a better attitude, his little sister in tow.

"Did you ever try," Hikari says, searching for the words, "Asuka, did you ever…did you ever attempt…"

"The first day I was back," she says with a small, sad smile, "I locked myself in the bathroom and was pulling apart the medicine cabinet. Stabbing? Someone tried that. I was going to drug myself to death."

Her frankness makes Hikari pale, her eyes going wide.

"Why did you stop?"

"Who said I stopped myself?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Misato is arguing with Ritsuko about the injuries and what to say. He can hear it, though. He can hear the doors to the medicine cabinet opening and closing, and pacing, hands pumping fists, he looks around. Grabbing the fire extinguisher from the kitchen, he runs past them, Misato yelling for him to wait.

The lock on the door breaks with one swing, and he kicks the door open, throwing aside the red metal tube as he walks in and slapping the vial of pills out of her hand. The red and white sedatives clatter on the floor, and Asuka stares at them. Shinji, the look of cold anger, Misato, the look of sympathy. Ritsuko, unreadable but not surprised.

Gripping her hair, hands balling into fists, she collapses to her knees and screams.

"He held me through the whole thing," Asuka says, "He convinced Misato not to…not to ship me away to an asylum. I don't know what he talked with his father about but he was…he was finally manning up. And it's weird, isn't it? The boy we had expected to slit his own wrists just bashed in a door to save me."

She sips her tea.

"Gott, I hope I haven't ruined this."

"Asuka, you haven't," Hikari says, squeezing her hand, "He's still around, isn't he? He's there every day for you and Ariel."

"He's there for Ariel," Asuka chokes, fingers trembling, "She's his best friend's daughter. Do you know that? Kaworu's Ariel's real father and she's pretty much the only thing that's left of him!"

"Asuka…"

"I…sorry. Sorry. I get the closest thing I ever did to a normal relationship…I f___ it up because I can't keep my legs closed. I feel like _crap_ for doing that to him. I feel like…"

She places the tea down.

"I feel sick," she sighs.

Which is when the arms wrap around her and her eyes go wide. She looks up, and the subject of the conversation looks back at her with patience, understanding, and sympathy.

"GPS tracker," Shinji says, "Special Inspector to NERV. Hi."

"Damn it," she whispers.

"First off," Shinji says, "I'm stronger than you. If I didn't want to sleep with you, I would have left. Second, I don't think less of you. I've _known_ people who you could call 'sluts', and you, Doctor, are not one of them. Third, yes, Ariel's the daughter of someone who I really, really was close to. But she's also _your_ daughter and she wants _me_ around."

"Well, glad we averted that crisis," Hikari says with a smile, sipping her tea, "Do you know what? This is _nice._ I like the occasional drama, but I'd rather have it on television than in my kitchen, thank you very much."

Both stare at her, Asuka relaxing into his arms.

"I'm sorry for being such a bitch to you," she says.

"I'm sorry for being a spineless wimp," he responds.

"And I'm sorry if I'm interrupting," Hikari says, "So you can go and take her home."

*

*

* * *

*

*

No car was there, so they walked. The apartment building the Suzuhara clan resides in was a half mile from their own building. No hands held, her eyes staring off to the distance through lenses as he pockets his hands. Sighing, he takes a step closer to her. She doesn't flinch, doesn't move away.

"You don't like talking about the past," he says.

"Nope," she says, "Nope, I don't. Don't think I ever will."

He nods. Never presses the issue, never moves out of her comfort zone. He's developed a nice little dance with Ms. Sohryu, always making sure to not set her off if he can. Not because he is afraid.

Well, yes. He is afraid, just of hurting her.

"It was difficult," she says, "Those four years, after you saved the world. Wasn't it?"

"Yeah. Kind of."

"Kind of?" she asks with a raised eyebrow, "God's sakes, Shinji. Kind of doesn't cut it! I was absolutely _insane!_"

*

*

* * *

*

*

The school yard is abuzz with activity. Cicadas chirping, people shouting, and a red headed teenage girl grabbing her tormentor by the throat, forcing the girl to her knees as she squeezes and squeezes before Shinji pulls her off, the girl kicking and screaming at insults both real and imagined.

"You got into fights," Shinji says, sighing, "I didn't blame you. You were…Asuka, you got off worse than any of us. People talked and…well, they didn't care. We tried to do our best and sometimes it just didn't work. You've never been easy to live with. I'll admit that. But I didn't mind."

"No," she says with a sad smile, "No, you didn't. You never complained, never cried. Never hit back, even though you should have. Saved my life more times than I can count, even…even when it wasn't directly you."

He nods. Of all the memories he could dredge up, one Angel was always off limits. One subject he never broached.

"I've never apologized," she says, "How about that? I've never apologized for when I left."

"I shouldn't have approached you like that."

"You had every right," she says, "We were young, there was going to be a school dance, and you thought it would raise my spirits to ask me out, to accompany you. The great heroes of the Angel War attending as a couple. And you know what I did? You know _why_ I did it?"

She stops. He does as well, turning to her. Face almost impassive, if slightly amused, she siddles up to him and smirks.

"Because," she says, "I thought, 'how _dare_ he pity me.' Practically every girl at the school was ready to throw themselves at you, but you _lowered_ yourself to ask me. Did you _ever_ pity me, back then?"

He shakes his head.

"Well, you should have," she says, "You really should have. I was damned pitiful. Hell, you weren't even conscious when I left."

*

*

* * *

*

*

Curled into a ball in her bedroom, she listens, impassive, to the yelling outside. Their guardian, demanding she come out, explain what she did. Why she punched her room mate in the nose and tried to strangle him. Why she put him in a coma, why she broke every window in the living room and kicked over the television.

Breaking point.

Finally, she's reached the breaking point.

The eighteen year old girl crawls across her room, past the overturned bed and shattered computer monitor, finally reaching the open cell phone and dials the number she has not looked at for four years.

"Papa?" she asks, voice cracked and weak, "Can I come home?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

"I know," he says, "Section 2 escorted you out the next day. Misato was beside herself when I woke up. Said she never wanted to see you again, but I convinced her not to hold a grudge."

She reaches out, touching his cheek. He smiles, and she smiles back.

"Why are you always so nice?" she asks, "How did I ever deserve it?"

"I knew," he says.

"Knew what?"

"Deep down, you were worth it," he says, "Everyone is. I can't hold a grudge for that reason. Asuka, my best friend is a guy who punched me in the face on my first day at school. His little sister, who Unit 01 stepped on, took me as her date to her junior prom last year. And don't get me started on my father."

She sighs, nodding, continuing to walk. He catches up, walking beside her. His confidence, his smile, reminds her of Kaji, except…not Kaji. Like Kaji gave him a lesson, but he made everything else up.

"What happened to him?" she asks, "Your father?"

"You mean, during the Impact?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Shinji watches, in dumb horror, as the man he hates with one hand rages at the woman they both loved. Both worshipped. Both were used by.

"How can you do this?" she asks, "I'm offering you paradise."

"At the end of a loaded gun," Gendo Ikari growls, "No paradise. Just Hell by any other word. You _used me._ You _used him._ You _used everyone._ Why?"

He lets her go. Yui Ikari struggles to her feet, as Gendo steps between the boy and the mother. His eyes pool with anger. Hurt. Betrayal. His remaining hand clenches into a fist as she stares him down…

And as any who tries to stare down the Supreme Commander of NERV, loses.

"I'm bringing us a new world," Yui says, "All it needs is Instrumentality. We'll make a new world. We'll rule it, as a family. The three of us as a Godhead."

"What about Rei," Shinji says.

"She's a tool," Yui responds, "Lilith's soul in a copy of me. She's the key to the doorway."

"And she'll cease to be," Gendo says, "I…I promised her. I promised her more than this."

"She understands," Yui says, smiling that smile of hers, "She'll do it. For you. For Shinji. We'll remake the world, make it better. Everything will be as it should be, and-"

The view shifts. Instead of the red sea and the plane, instead of the verdant fields, it becomes something else. The blasted Geofront, and an impaled silhouette of the maimed Unit 02.

"Shinji," Yui says, "What are you…"

"No," Shinji says, rising to his feet, "No. No. No. No! NO!"

"So that's it," Gendo says with a small grin, "The Second Child. If we continue this, she'll…"

"Die," Yui says, "And we'll just remake her. We'll make her better than she was before. Won't we, Shinji?"

She turns, to where he should be. Where he should be standing, waiting for him. Only to find he is walking away, walking from her. Head bowed, shaking his head, Gendo Ikari laughs. Finally, turning on his heel, he begins to walk away…and stops, turning his head to her as she watches in shock, betrayal and horror crossing her face.

"Goodbye," he says, and-

*

*

* * *

*

*

"I didn't stop Instrumentality," Shinji says, "Not alone. My father finally saw what sort of manipulative…bitch…my mother was, and stood up to her. He rejected her and…it gave me the strength to, as well. When everything cleared, and we all turned up alive, I was at his bedside to wait for him. When he woke up, we talked."

He looks down as they begin to approach the apartment.

"During Instrumentality, when he attacked my mother," he says, "He…called me his son. For the first time. I may never see him as a father, Asuka, but I certainly can't hate him. He turned down paradise with my mother to save me."

"And Rei."

He nods.

"When he recovered, my father told me something," he says, a small smile passing over his face, "Rei was never intended as a replacement for my mother."

He looks up, pushing the button for the elevator.

"She was made as a replacement for me."

*

*

* * *

*

*

Lying alone in his bed that night, Shinji dreams fitfully. He sees open doors running down a hallway, hears footsteps, hears laughing. There is wind in his ear, breath on the back of his neck as he walks along, a little girl with red hair running past him.

_Dreams are a funny thing,_ the voice says, _Did you know how they can be shared? And broken?_

He turns. Standing before him is Asuka…but not her. The red haired woman, unscarred, unmarked, with two blue eyes regards him cooly, her summer dress swaying as she walks around him. He cannot move, cannot speak. She regards him, tracing her finger along his jaw, looking him in the eye, pressing her hand against his chest-

_Ten years ago. Asuka opens the door as Shinji finishes taking off his shirt. Freezing, she sees the scar. A perfect circle on his chest, the exit on the opposite side._

_ "It missed my heart," he says, "Went through part of my lung. Dr. Akagi said I shouldn't take up smoking._

She closes the door-

"Get away from him."

A light, a sphere, and someone else. Someone who Shinji thought he'd never see again. Someone he maybe, just maybe, hoped he's never see again The woman turns from Shinji turning to the lab coat wearing woman, locking eyes with her.

"Oh, now we get some words out of you," Kyoko Zeppelin Sohryu spits, "He betrayed you. He deserves to suffer. He'll betray my girl just like she betrayed me, to."

"You betrayed her long before that," Yui Ikari growls, narrowing her eyes as they flash yellow, "Never play innocent. You don't have the right. I don't have the right. I punished myself because I deserve to be punished."

Kyoko waves her hand, a sphere forming around Yui to silence her. A sphere with shatters as soon as it forms. Reaching out, she grabs Kyoko by the collar, pulling her away. Holding her up with one hand like a mother cat scolding a kitten, she turns back to him, sadness without end evident in her eyes.

"My boy," she says, "My beautiful, wonderful boy. _Can you __**ever forgive me-**_

**_*_**

**_*_**

**_

* * *

_**

*

*

With a start, he wakes up. There's a thin layer of sweat covering him, he is breathing heavy, and he lays back as he catches his bearings to find an arm wrapping around him. Turning, startled, he stares into one blue eye and one red eye.

"Asuka?"

"Ariel heard you screaming in your sleep," she whispers, "She was worried. She's sleeping on the couch and I checked up on you."

He smiles. A tired, amused smile, wrapping an arm around her waist.

"We seem to end up in bed a lot," he says.

"Don't get any ideas," she says, raising an eyebrow, "My daughter thinks the world of you. I think you're alright, myself, but…"

He pulls her closer, touching his lips to hers. The light clicks out, and there is but silence.

*

*

* * *

*

*

One dream, then another.

From her son's to the one she may one day call daughter. She sees her dreaming, dreaming of running down a hall to find a suicide. With a flick of her wrist, the door closes, the dream self of Asuka Langely Sohryu turning to find the young mother-scientist offering her a piece of candy and sending her on her way.

One dream, then another.

Now she is in the dream of the girl in the next room. She sees fields and streams and play, children laughing, and the pale boy sitting on a rocking horse, watching her with a friendly smile.

One dream, then another.

She skips across the red sky and blood streams, pale children with blonde hair and glasses dancing around the alabaster woman who is in a roundabout way her daughter.

One dream, then another.

She walks in on her own wedding, finding the image of herself in her gown, but covered in blood and fire. She will talk with her husband about this.

And so she goes. Laughing merrily, skipping, a song in her heart and plan in her head, Yui Ikari wanders for the night before returning to the Core and her self imposed exile. This was her gift. This was her freedom. One night, dealing with her guilt.

Walking in the shadow of dreams.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Few things are more disturbing than the sight of Rei Ayanami skipping through the hallway. Not only the fact that she is, of course, a twenty six year old woman and Tactical Operations Commander of NERV-1. There is also the fact that she is _Rei,_ and despite having the body language of an excitable school child, she is also wearing the same indifferent expression on her face.

The reason for that is quite simple.

_Babies._

It took several tries, and more than a little experimentation in both the anatomical and chemical fields, but she has a _baby_. Well, in nine months she'll have a _baby._

Babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies babies _babies. Babies._

Her heightened sense of self awareness has told her that yes, Kensuke has managed to hit the genetic bullseye, and currently incubating inside her is a mass of quickly dividing cells. Of course, now comes the part where she has to actually prepare, and neither Adam nor Lilith have been particularly helpful in that aspect. Adam wants to eat the young, Lilith still wants her to bone her brother, but Rei is looking for shops to register at.

Skipping by, Commander Ikari raises an eyebrow as she passes, before rubbing the bridge of his nose and walking down the hall towards the Cage. Stopping at the catwalk in front of Unit 03, he spots the pilot, standing in front of it. Communing with it. Ikari has neither confirmed nor denied that a remnant of the 13th Angel has survived inside Unit 03, but it is assumed that there is. Suzuhara is not the most articulate man, and it is doubted he could make something like 'Bart' up.

"Pilot."

"Commander," Touji says, saluting, "Another Kaiju dealt with."

"A flying monitor lizard, yes," Ikari says, standing beside him, "The daycare center is rebuilt?"

"And restaffed," Touji responds, "No casualties at all. My wife got everyone out before Ariel went critical."

Ikari nods, staring at the Evangelion. The creature stares back, never moving, never responding. Like all of them, impassive unless awakened. He has bothered to learn the names of the pilots, this time around. If anything, the three Children twelve years ago were the main reasons his Impact did not come to fruition. Who held back the tide of madness, at cost to them.

"Something on your mind, sir?"

"Always," Ikari responds, "As you were."

He walks past Suzuhara, who simply adjusts the wrist control on his plugsuit before walking out of the Cage, towards the showers.

The lift takes Ikari past the central holding area, the great prison of Unit 01. He felt it, of course.

Yui slipped her self-imposed prison last night, if only for moments. The sentient spirit of Kyoko Sohryu approached her, dragged her out. There is a glimmer of awareness.

He does not hate her. He was…disappointed in her. His own image of his wife did not match up with the reality, and he realizes it never did. No purely sane or selfless woman would partner with a group as megalomaniacal as SEELE, nor invest in the creation of the Divine Technology.

But still, she was noble. Her goal, the purest form of her goal, was to see her family never hurt again, but to do so would also hurt them. She could not understand them, in the end. How her death had destroyed her husband. How the lack of mother in his life caused Shinji to form a foster family around himself, and when they were hurt, maimed, killed, then he could not stand with her. How the child created originally as a sacrifice to her rebelled.

But now…

Now she is beginning to peak out.

"I love it when a plan comes together."

*

*

* * *

*

*

It is his day off. Technically, his day off is time he can work on other projects, such as research, investigation, etc. However, he delegates people for that so he can focus on the actually important aspects of his life.

Like standing in front of the primary school and waiting for the five year old girl to spot him in a crowd of dismissing school children. Grinning as she runs towards him, her scoops her up, placing her on his shoulders as they walk down the street.

"How was school?" Shinji asks.

"Boring. Mama taught me all of this already."

"Because your Mama's a very smart person. She'll be late tonight."

"I know," Ariel pouts, "She's been late a lot. She says tomorrow's the 'day.'"

"Oh?" Shinji asks, raising an eyebrow, "What day?"

"Said it's the day she's better than Grandma. She says it when she's alone. Tomorrow she'll be a better Mama than her Mama."

Shinji nods. Grimacing, her recalls the details. He remembers that shouting match between Asuka and her step sister, where Asuka told her that Ariel's almost as old…as she as when she walked in on her mother's suicide. Sighing, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out his cell phone, dialing a number.

"Misato? I need tomorrow off…year, personal business. Okay."

Clicking it off, he continues walking, girl on his shoulders. Planning.

*

*

* * *

*

*

The best way to distract an emotionally unstable person from dangerous thoughts is to keep them so occupied they can't think straight. The first is a good, big breakfast.

He woke up an hour earlier than them. Whipping together a platter of as many east European breakfast foods as he can recall, he places them on a cart and wheels them to the apartment next door. Knocking on the door, he waits, trying to think of how to compose the opening statement. 'Happy anniversary of your mental trauma' does not seem appropriate.

The door opens, and he looks down to see Ariel. Looking at him, worried.

"Ariel," he asks, "Where's your Mama?"

"Mama won't come out of her room," she says, "I'm worried."

Eyes go wide. Running past the cart, he skids down the hallway in front of the bedroom and pounds on the door.

"Asuka?" he yells, "Asuka, open this door!"

A weak gurgling from the other side, followed by a weaker 'go away.' Gritting his teeth, he glares at the door lock. Balling his hands into fists, he takes a step back and rams the door with his shoulder, bashing it open as Ariel squeaks-

And he gets hit in the face by a slipper.

"What the _Hell?!_"

Rubbing his forehead, he sees her sitting up on the bed, fistfuls of tissues in her hands and bags under her eyes.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

"What does it _look like?_" she weakly mutters, "Got a cold. Was gonna send Ariel over to you so she didn't get sick. Whattaya want?"

Shoulders slump, he walks over to her as she weakly, half-heartedly protests and gathers her in his arms, pressing his nose against her hair as he gives off a breath of palpable relief. She grabs his shirt, resting her head on his shoulder, grinning.

"What's the occasion?" she asks.

"Just remembering something," he whispers, "Ariel said today was the day. Congratulations."

She stares at him for a moment before understanding dawns on her. A sad smile appears on her face, and she relaxes against him. Tears gently dribble down her face, her body relaxing against his, and she closes her eyes.

"Am I a good mother?" she asks.

"The best," he responds with a grin.


	10. ConSummation

Appropriately, the rain pours on the dark, slick day as the funeral band plays. Despite his decidingly non-military background, the organization he served for ten years of his life pulled the strings, and a military procession was arranged. Those who accuse Gendo Ikari of not having a heart had not seen what he had done in this case, watching as the casket is lowered into the cold, eternal ground. The man was buried with a few of his most prized possessions;

A yearbook from his college, just prior to Second Impact.

A shogi board.

And a small piece of red crystal. No one would know what it was, save for two of the mourners. The tall man with amber glasses and the blonde woman with a touch of gray. The man spent ten years fighting Angels.

So they buried him with a piece of one.

"Ashes to ashes," Gendo Ikari says, "Dust to dust. A shame you couldn't see the end of it, Professor. It would have been _glorious._"

Turning on his heel, he inclines his head at the dress uniformed form of Misato Katsuragi.

"Handle the rest," he says.

"Sir," she responds.

And Gendo Ikari leaves, as the funeral of Kozou Fuyutsuki concludes.

-

-

Chapter 10: (Con)Summation

**-**

**-**

It takes a while for anyone to speak up, as the black stretch limo winds its way down the streets of Tokyo-3. All are dressed in black, even those who did not know him. Ariel in a black, white frilled dress sits on Shinji's lap, as Asuka leans against him.

Rei is in a black dress uniform, Asuka in a black dress and coat, and Touji in a black suit. And all are silent.

"Never really knew him that well," Touji finally says, "You know. The Professor. How old was he?"

"Seventy two," Rei answers, "He died of a coronary embolism. He died in his sleep."

"Good for him," Asuka mutters, "How they all got off is beyond me…"

"I got to know Mr. Fuyutsuki," Shinji interjects, "He was a friend of my mother's. He told me a lot about her…how she was before all this started. He…blamed himself for a lot of it."

She turns to him, questioning eyes. Few subjects are as hard to broach as Shinji's relationship with the higher ups of NERV past Misato. Only recently has any understanding passed between them of his relationship with his father, and this…

"He's…well, he was in love with my mother," Shinji explains, "And he cared for her. Eventually, he decided he cared for her like a daughter and started talking to me. My relationship with everyone was…weird for a while, I guess."

Ariel has already fallen asleep. Rei watches them, smiling. Family.

She'll have one of her own, soon enough.

*

*

* * *

*

*

For a few moments, she allows her eyes to adjust to the area around her. It is not easy to admit one is lost, even less so to admit that you have no idea why you are there in the first place. Then the hangover subsides, and Doctor Ritsuko Akagi sits up, looking around the familiar apartment of her friend as the ringing in her head turns out to be the ringing of her phone.

"Yes," she mutters," holding it to her head, and, realizing it is closed, flips it open, "Yes? Oh, hello dear. Yes, yes. Yes, we're done here. And yes, it's a good idea you didn't show up…no, I don't think they care what you _did,_ but I do think that _she _wouldn't want you around here."

She listens to the muted complaining on the other line, putting her feet up on the coffee table and rubbing the bridge of her nose. Always like this. Always with her spouse asking why _they_ didn't get invited to the funeral, and the reason for that is just waking up now, shuffling out of her bedroom and starting a pot of coffee.

"That your bed buddy?" Misato mutters, "Tell'm to go to Hell."

"Misato says hi," Ritsuko says with a small grin.

Katsuragi sticks her tongue out. Sighing, Ritsuko leans back, grinning into the phone.

"It was fine," she says, "Twenty one gun salute and everything. I think he'd be embarrassed by how much we focused on him, though. Okay, darling. I'll see you soon."

She closes the phone, dropping it in her purse as she slips on her shoes.

"I'll get going," she says, "How's it being a grandmother?"

"Last time I saw my 'granddaughter' she was floating two hundred feet in the air," Misato mutters, "Yeah, I haven't gotten a chance to let it sink in, but on the other hand I'm probably the sanest grandmother that girl has."

"Yes…the Seventeenth was her father, wasn't he? And, of course, we know about Doctor Sohryu's psychological…problems."

"Insane bitch killed herself in front of her daughter."

"Tactful as always, Misato."

She blows her a raspberry, downing the coffee in one gulp and gagging. Almost on cue, the Kaiju alarms sound, and muttering, she begins walking to her bedroom and uniform.

*

*

* * *

*

*

On the bridge of Central Dogma, Asuka watches as Unit 00, resplendant in its bright orange and white glory, tackles the large spider and begins pounding on its face. It squeals as the Eva proceeds to rip off one of its legs and beat it to death with it, the bridge crew watching in confusion at Rei's uncharacteristically savage outburst.

"What's with her?" Misato asks, stepping onto the bridge.

"The Terronantula, as Section 1 is calling it," Asuka explains, "Almost stepped on a day care center."

"Ah yes," Misato says, folding her arms, "Our miss Ayanami's feeling nice and maternal, ain't she?"

"Seems wrong."

"Damn straight."

Checking her watch, she waits as the numbers tick down to the Kaiju being dead. Tapping her foot, she purses her lips until the announcement comes, and Misato nods.

"Well, that was fun," she says, "Who's up for chinese?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

"So, what is it now? Three weeks since you arrived?"

Slipping off her shoes as she walks into the apartment, Asuka nods, as Shinji takes her coat and hangs it up. She smiles, rolling her neck as Ariel skips past her, slinging her backpack over the couch and taking out her homework.

"Good worker," he says, "Smart kid."

He hefts up the grocery bag,

"Don't you know it," Asuka responds, "Yeah…three weeks. Hard to believe, isn't it?"

She walks to the kitchen, opening the fridge. Scanning over the six pack of beer, she takes one, cracking it open and sipping it as Ariel begins on her work. He sighs, walking into the kitchen, taking the wok from the top cabinet and rifling through ingredients.

"What?" she asks.

"Nothing," he says.

"Because I'm having a drink after a long day," she says, tipping the beer at him, "You have any idea how much _crap_ goes into cleaning up a God Damn Kaiju? Times like this I understand why Misato drank."

"Misato drank because she had a front row seat to Second Impact," Shinji responds, pointing the wooden spoon in his hand at her, "She did a good job raising us despite it, to. Speaking of which…"

"Gott, don't bring him up," Asuka sighs, sipping the beer, "We have enough father figures as is. Your father, my paternal Himbo, and of course…"

"Surprised he wasn't there," Shinji responds, watching the vegetables saute, "He and Mr. Fuyutsuki knew each other. He knew a lot of us, really…you, to."

Asuka nods, sighing. Watching Ariel work out of the corner of her eye, she puts down the beer, walking to him. Standing behind him, she wraps her arms around his waist, sighing onto his neck as he smiles.

"Are we in a relationship?" he asks.

"I think so," she says, "Well, I mean, other than…you know. That was random."

"Mm hm."

"You saved my daughter," she says, resting her head on his shoulder, "You'll have to do better for the next time."

He smiles. A small, knowing smile. Nodding in agreement, he pats her hands. Of course he'll have to do better. And like his father, who in recent years he has gone much and much more like, he _has a plan._

_*_

_*_

_

* * *

_

*

*

Somewhere between Shinji making complex plans within plans to score and Rei beating a spider to death for threatening _babies,_ their major paternal figure decided to do something to push things in the desired direction. Gendo Ikari checks his pocket watch, waiting as the lift speeds down the skeletal passageways, outside Ramiel's corpse, into the ground and caverns beneath.

The lift stops in a black hallway, lined with gleaming obsidian metal. This area is not on the maps, not official. It is known only to a handful of people. And only two know of its true purpose. Him, and the one he considers his daughter. Rei has been here. Rei has been the key here. It is she who is able to communicate, able to translate. Although he has picked up the language himself over time.

An after effect of Adam's residence in his missing right hand.

Walking down the hallway, flexing his prosthetic hand, he lets his footsteps and breath echo, as the hallway lights up in his presence…

And it notices him.

"_Ikari,_" it says, "_Welcome back._"

The voice is melodious and deep. Stroking the back of his mind with promises of power and blood, singing a song of fire.

"You speak in my mind," he says, "You trust me, now?"

"_The one who is Mother/Father trusts you. I trust you through her. Do you appreciate it, Ikari?_"

Stepping into the larger cavern, he snaps his fingers. Lights begin turning on in sequence, casting an ethereal, alien glow upon the sole resident. It took…time for it to be rejected from the Body of its destroyer. More time for the single cells to regenerate to the point where it has awareness and Self. More time still, for the Rage to subside.

"_I am at peace,_" it continues, "_The presence of Mother/Father is enough to keep me satiated. The dead rumblings of the Brother above me keeps me…company. And you…keep me entertained._"

The twin lights in its eyes glow as the last light turns on. The metallic grimace turns to Ikari. Its terrible visage, as before, as always before, does not frighten him. In fact, it respects him. For this terrible and ancient creature has found in the steely glare of Gendo Ikari something it has searched for, for ages.

An equal will.

"_Your plan proceeds apace,_" it says, "_Soon, the Summation will begin. Shall they stand by your side, Ikari?"_

"It will be different, this time," Ikari responds, "Before, I manipulated them. This time, they will see the goal. And they will stand with me to the death."

The Angel of Might, Zeruel, allows itself a deep, muttering, telepathic chuckle.

"_How does it feel,_" it asks, "_To no longer be a monster?"_

Gendo Ikari smirks.

"Human."

And with that, he turns and walks out.

*

*

* * *

*

*

The fun part of the steady relationship Rei now enjoys is that he chosen male counterpart is actually adventurous. In several ways. There are the adventurous ways he has which has ended up her getting a _baby,_ but there is also the fact that he is certainly willing to follow an impulse and whim. To that extent, Rei has gone with Kensuke onto the shooting of his latest documentary.

Which now has him chased by a Polar Bear, which is itself odd as there is no more North Pole. Watching while sitting on the hood of his jeep, sitting in the non waterlogged part of Northern Russia, she watches as the father of her future baby(s) screams in abject terror, running from 1000 pounds of angry white ursine.

Sighing, she hops off the hood, tightening the black knit gloves on her hands and adjusting the fur cap, skipping towards the path of the screaming paternal and roaring animal. Calmly stepping between them, she levels her gaze at the bear and cracks her knuckles.

It stops, rears up, sniffing…and then turns and runs away.

And grabbing the freaked, frightened young man, she drags him to the back of the jeep.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Part 1:

Find a nice, out of the way restaurant outside NERV-1 that serves european food. Pick up an order of bratwurst, asparagus and potato dumplings. Using key card he swiped from her when she wasn't looking, get in the apartment and set up dinner for her when she and Ariel arrive.

Part 2:

"I don't believe it," Asuka says, pulling off Ariel's raincoat as she looks at the table with a laugh, "You're either apologizing for something or you want something."

"Is it enough to do this from the bottom of my heart?" Shinji asks, an innocent look plastered on his face.

"No."

He shrugs with a smile, a laugh issuing from her from her accusation as she hangs up her dripping coat, thunder cracking in the distance. Ariel has already unpacked her book bag and taken out her homework, smiling sweetly at Shinji as he smiles back. The lightning flashes and the lights flicker, Asuka muttering something german.

"So," he says, "I was thinking dinner…help Ari with her homework…"

"Rei's back tonight, isn't she?" Asuka asks.

"Yeah. She's been having fun on her vacation," he responds, sipping his soda, "She's been coming to you for tips?"

"I spotted her in front of Unit 02, asking questions about nursing," Asuka says with a chuckle, "That kid's either going to be pampered or _insane._"

They laugh, the two of them, Ariel looking up from her homework as her mother and her father figure almost collapse against the counter laughing. Twelve years ago, they doubted they would even live to be adults, much less parents. Now, the one who was never intended to live past fifteen years old is going to become a mother.

"I really want to see how Rei handles nursery rhymes," Asuka says, wiping her eyes.

"I want to see her at parent teacher conferences," Shinji laughs, "Remember when I kept trying to get my father to those conferences?"

"Gott, remember when he _came?_"

He nods, grinning from ear to ear. The microwave dings, Asuka smiling and turning to her daughter.

"Dinner!"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Part 3:

Sliding the door shut, Asuka smiles, leaning her back against the wall. The clicks the lights low. The night is coming to a close, and some people need to sleep.

"So," she says, "A nice dinner of my favorite foods. Helping me with my daughter, as always. Catching up on old times and helping me forget some of the…harder parts of the last few weeks."

She walks past him as he leans on the table, watching her. She smiles, pursing her lips, studying him.

"What do you want?"

"Who ever said it was some _thing?_" he asks.

His hands wrap around her waist, pulling her to him. Their lips touch, briefly, and he turns her around, her back against his chest. She gasps, feeling his hand move her hair aside and his lips press against just above the base of her neck.

Her scar.

"What are you doing?" she asks, her voice low, trembling.

"You'll see," he says with a small chuckle, "I had an idea…"

"Stop," she says, her teeth grining, "Seriously. Stop. Stop it."

She tries to push away, his hands locking around her waist. She closes her eyes, lips trembling as he delicately traces his lips along the pale white circle, her body shaking against him, her fingers tightening around his hands.

Her nails dig into his hands, drawing blood and making him release her, Shinji swearing as she pulls away. Eyes wide, lip trembling, fingers tightening into balls as they circle each other. He isn't angry, isn't hurt. Only intent, only…focused, for lack of a better word.

"What are you doing?" she asks.

"Helping."

"By…by just focusing on _this?_" she asks, pulling at her shirt collar, "Damn it! _God damn it!_ Of all the…"

Closing her eyes, lowering her head, she shakes her head and leans against the table. Her shoulders shake and her breath hitches, and she digs her nails into the wood, pointing to the door.

"Get out," she says, "Just…just get out."

"No."

He moves. Not towards the door, towards her, grabbing her arms and pulling her from the table, holding her fast in front of him.

"No," he says, "No, I'm not. You wanted to know why I did this?"

"Just trying to save me again, aren't you?" she asks, voice barely above a whisper, "Dime story psychology, isn't it? Get me to value my imperfections?"

"Asuka…"

"Always have to be saved, don't I?" she asks, pulling away, wrapping her arms around herself, "I…I don't care, anymore. I don't care if I'm not perfect. I just don't want to be _reminded_ of it _every single second of every f___ing day!_"

She braces against the table, eyes clenched shut. Her body shakes as she breathes, her mind rampant, confused, clouded. Sighing, he places his hands on her shoulders, working through her flinch, working through her shaking.

"What do you remember about the 14th Angel?" he asks.

"What?" she asks, craning her neck, "What does that have to-"

"I was in the shelter when Unit 02's head came crashing through," he says, "And all I could think, even through Kaji lecturing me, even through the run to NERV was, 'She's dead. Asuka's dead and it's because I _did nothing.'_"

"Why are you…"

"I kept trying to get the Eva to go berserk during the Fifteenth," he says, "And I told my father to go to Hell when the Sixteenth attacked you…and when Kaworu attacked, and he took control of Unit 02…I remember saying, 'Sorry, Asuka,' because I knew having to damage it would hurt you. Even if you were…in a coma at the time."

Nose resting in her hair, breath tickling her ear, his arms close around her.

"I never rescued you to humiliate you," he says, "I did it to _save_ you. I will _always_ try to save you, because that's what _I do._"

"And why do I always need to be saved?" she whispers.

He turns her around. Eyes meeting, almost iridescently blue in the darkness, he smiles.

"Because that's what a guy does," he says, "For the woman he loves."

The sappiness never get the chance to dig in. It doesn't because she grabs him by the collar and pulls him in for a kiss, his arms wrapping around her, their foreheads resting against each other as they relax, as they finish.

"So, Third," she says, "What _was_ your idea?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Hands intertwined, lying on the bed, they lie, panting, smiling, and laughing. He continued his original idea. He kissed _every_ last one of her scars. He caressed them, lathered them in affection, and was very, very _thorough_ in his appreciation of those little white marks. Which now, in retrospect, aren't that major…save for the slight little differences in sensitivity, which he took…excellent advantage of.

Of course, after that was done, after he pressed his lips to every scar, traced his lips up and down her right arm, kissed around her eye, and made sure she would _never_ forget where each one was…the real fun began.

It was fortunate he covered her mouth, otherwise she would have woken Ari. She would have woken the floor.

She would have woken the entire apartment block.

Hands intertwined, she giggles, exhausted staring at him as he rolls onto his side, gathering her into his arms as she lets her eyes close. As sleep, exhausted, merciful sleep, begins to claim her, she nestles her nose against his neck and whispers a final gasp of words before they drift off.

"Good idea."

*

*

* * *

*

*

Eight months, three days, Rei Ayanami thinks, admiring the small wonder of technology that is the home pregancy test as she buttons the last button of her NERV uniform, shrugging on her jacket. Technology agrees with her instinct, and soon to come will be a baby. Babies Babies Babies Babies Babies Babies Babies Babies Babies.

That part of her that is Lilith is singing in joy, although not singing very well. Rolling her head, she checks her cell phone, another poetic message from Kensuke on the screen, hoping she is well now that she's back home and, yes, they will go out for lunch today, he has a clear schedule.

Yes, life is good, Rei thinks. Already close to twice her originally intended age and she is finally, finally, happy.

Yes, indeed.

Yes, yes yes indeed.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yessy yess

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

No.

She lurches forward, grabbing the table. Red eyes go wide as she gasps, fingers digging deep grooves into the finished wood as her knees buckle and her breath stops.

No.

Another stab of deep, biting pain drives through her, collapsing onto her elbow, scrambling for her cell phone, another spasm making her kick out one of the chairs, flipping the phone and frantically dialing the number as her heart skips beats and her body _betrays_ her on a level she never contemplated or imagined.

_No._

The phone dials, rings, and the familiar, loving, warm voice answers.

"H-h…help," she whispers, before another driving, stabbing, _terrible_ pain makes her release the phone, leaving long grooves along the surface of the table before she finally collapses onto her back, arms splayed as she stares unblinking at the ceiling light. Mouthing the same word over and over again.

"No. No. _No. No. No. No…_"

*

*

* * *

*

*

He uses her key card, the door jamming before he steps back and kicks it open. Slamming the light on, Kensuke runs in, looking about, finding silence.

"Rei?" he shouts, "REI?!"

A pained gasp comes from the kitchen. Running, he pushes aside furniture, turning the table…

And finding her. Lying on her back, arms and legs splayed wild, chest shaking with every breath. For a moment, he wonders, wonders what is wrong, wonders if this is another of her tests or…

"Oh…oh no," he whispes.

Then he sees the trickling stream of blood trailing down the inside of her leg, pooling on the floor.

Grabbing his phone, he dials the number.

"I need an emergency team," he says, "Ayanami's apartment! _Now!_"

Closing and tossing aside the phone, he goes down to his knees, tilting her head up, mouthing his words, his prayers, eyes eyes blinking, finally as she sees him. He takes her shoulders, takes her hands, the two lovers looking into each others eyes as her lip begins trembling and the water begins pooling in her eyes.

Silently, he pulls her close, Rei burying her face in his shirt as she begins screaming.

*

*

* * *

*

*

Silently closing the phone, Shinji lets it drop. Stirring from her slumber, Asuka pulls the sheers up, sitting up as she touches her hand against his shoulder.

"Who was that?" she asks.

Early morning light streams through the windows. A new day begins.

"It was Doctor Akagi," he says, "Something…something's gone wrong. With Rei."

He blinks back tears, balling his hands into fists. Bites back the bile.

"She had a miscarriage. Rei's lost the baby."


	11. The Case of Ayanami Rei

"_Just relax, Shinji. You already know all the procedures. It should be just like riding a bicycle."_

"Asuka, last I remember a bicycle wasn't two hundred feet tall and my bicycle certainly never tried to kill me."

"_Smart ass._"

He lets off a small, grim chuckle. Moments of levity in tragedy. They tried to keep it light hearted, tried to keep in funny and irrelevant. When Misato ordered the cross test, it was to both see if he was still able to and also see if she could maybe, just maybe, lighten the mood from the horror of the past few days.

The plug suit is bulkier. The gloves are padded, armored, with a blue light on the back of his hand that glows when he thinks. The A-10 connectors, they explained, had become out dated. Now they were built directly into the suit.

It's still his color. White, black at the waist, stomach, inside of the legs, blue highlights are the chest and piped down the arms and the legs. There is another one of the blue orbs squared center of his chest, which acts like a monitor for a particular commodity the Evas might try to take.

His soul.

All in all though, Shinji Ikari has filled out nicely over the past twelve years, and the plugsuit is testament to that. He got cat calls from some of the female technicians when he ascended the ladders into the plug of Unit 03. Sitting in the amber liquid, hands clasping the butterfly controls, his thoughts wander. Wander to the hope, wander to the darkness. Wander towards the future, and where it may take him.

"_Well, you two have had an interesting life,"_ Misato chimes in, "_Is Unit 03 blushing?"_

Both Shinji and Asuka spit take, Asuka glaring at her superior.

"_Man, you kids are easy to f___ with. Okay, Shinji, your synch score in Unit 03 absolutely sucks. I never thought I'd say Touji was a superior pilot, but in this case he is. Holding at…Asuka?"_

_ "Twenty one percent,"_ Asuka says, recomposing herself as she glares at Katsuragi, "_One point past Bart's activation threshhold. You could get it to walk, but not play the piano."_

"What about the Cello?"

"_I say we increase LCL pressure and see what happens."_

_ "I say we stick you in there and see if you do any better, Misato."_

The phone chimes. Misato answers it, nodding, and closes it.

"_Okay, get out of there,"_ she says, "_That was Ritsuko. Rei's ready to receive visitors."_

-

-

Chapter 11: The Case of Ayanami Rei

-

-

The steady beeps of the heart rate monitor is the main sound of the room, as none of the other occupants can bring themselves to say anything. Kensuke has a two day growth of stubble, testament to the fact that he has not left her side in that long, subsisting on hospital food and water to be with her during this time. Rei is pale, but paler than even she should be. The tracts of tears still mark her face, her gaze withdrawn, her shoulders shaking with every breath.

"Hi."

They turn, as Shinji and Asuka walk in. Kensuke smiles, relief on his face. Rei stares at them, and says nothing, only looking down as they walk to her.

"God, I'm sorry," Asuka says, taking Rei's hand and squeezing it, "If there's anything I can do…"

"There is," Rei says.

Kensuke blinks. He squeezes her hand. The first word she has said in two days, or at least the first coherant word. Two days of sobbing, crying, screaming and wailing. Hours spent with her in silence followed by random breakdowns and fits. He smiles, pressing his lips to her forehead, lacing his fingers with hers.

"I'm…sorry," Rei says, her voice quiet, dry, "I…worried you."

"Don't apologize," Shinji says, taking the other side of the bed, squeezing her shoulder, "That's my job. Doctor Akagi wouldn't let us visit you."

"I'm surprised she let you stay," Asuka says with a smirk, staring at Kensuke.

"I told her she'd have to sedate me first," he responds with a small, humorless chuckle, "Rei…what do you need?"

Rei furrows her brow. She contemplates the next words and thinks in such a way to not set off her old rival. Opening her mouth, she closes it. No, she thinks. This is too great a favor to ask.

"I can be of assistance," Doctor Ritsuko Akagi says, walking in through the far door, "As I explained to Rei and Mister Aida, there was a reason for Rei's miscarriage."

Asuka rolls her eyes.

"Please, don't sugar coat it at all," she says, squeezing Rei's hand.

"I'm not paid to sugar coat," Akagi says, glaring at her successor, "But the truth is, outside of Commander Ikari I know more about Rei's anatomy than anyone on Earth. Rei is a hybrid of Angelic and Human DNA. As such, we overestimated the chance that she could successfully conceive and carry a child to term. She has a fully functional reproductive system, it's just that the Angelic DNA is hyper aggressive and viewed the embryo as a foreign object."

"And destroyed it," Rei says.

Shinji mutters a swear.

"The chances of by random creating a child one quarter Angel and three quarters human is…very small," Akagi says, "Even in those cases, the Angelic parts will, in confusion, attack the human cells, resulting in something inviable."

Asuka sits up. Turning to Akagi, then to Rei, she nods.

"Except," she says, "For one case."

"Your daughter," Rei says, "She's the only one."

"And with your permission," Akagi says, folding her arms, "I'd like to bring her to my lab to run some tests. I'd like to see what she got _right."_

_*_

_*_

_

* * *

_

*

*

She seizes up. Something, she realizes, is wrong. Something terribly, terribly wrong. A child, _her child,_ cries out, and it is not the one who shamed her, but the one He made to stand in for her, to sacrifice for her. The Doll, the Copy, the Abomination…

Is crying.

Is mourning.

Was she…_yes._ She was progressing, far and far past what she was…

Peaking out of her prison, she rides the waveforms of the MAGI into the real world once more. Partly a mother but also a scientist, her curiosity is peaked. The girl, the half-breed, was…changing. Was becoming…maternal. Was attempting to procreate, but a single moment dashed those attempts, and now she is retreating.

She can see the light of her soul, an odd obese thing of three lights. Of white light, of blue light, surrounding her own, a thing of red and alabaster that wraps around itself, almost blinding her with its ethereal, magnificent beauty.

Pressing her hand to it, she enters the soul, enters the dream. Sees the world of red lakes and blasted land crumbling around her, everything screaming and dying. Sighing, figuring all her children have to be melodramatic, she walks through, mindless of the disaster around her, to the spot where she sits. Of course, it's not exactly her. Here, she is a girl of nine years old, dressed in a frilly black and white dress, the same age as when that hateful bitch throttled her.

"Hello, Rei," Yui says, "You've been having a bad time of it, haven't you?"

Dumly, Rei nods.

"Oh, poor dear," Yui says, cupping her face, "Poor little dear. I know…I know you are not my own. Not exactly. But in a way, in a long, roundabout way…I am your mother."

She forms another rock, sitting across from her.

"So I think…it is my job to make it better."

*

*

* * *

*

*

Her eyes open, slowly, painfully. She sees his shirt first, the pencil in his pocket, trailing up to his stubble covered, drooling face. They brought in a second bed, connected it with hers, because he hadn't slept since he brought her in. Hadn't left her side. Subsisted on hospital food and cups of water until she finally, finally _responded_ to something.

Rei opens her eyes and stares at him, rolling onto her side and wrapping her arm around his chest, resting her chin on his shoulder as he stirs. He takes her hand, squeezing it, smiling sadly.

"Hey," he says.

She doesn't respond. Not verbally. She just rests her arms around him, buries her nose in his shirt. He wraps his arms around her, pulling her to him, the wires of the EKG machine and monitors straining but not failing.

"Are you going to be alright?" he whispers.

She closes her eyes.

"Will you be there?" she asks in response.

"Always."

A smile. Small and meaningful.

"Then…yes."

*

*

* * *

*

*

Deep underground, it stirs. Zeruel, Angel of Might. Angel of Song. Destroyer, Annihilator, Breaker of Worlds. It senses it coming, senses the changes in the air as it shifts its great and mighty bulk, raising its grimace as it takes account of the air.

"_Ah yes. I sense it. Do you not?"_

A low, deep, loving chuckle.

"_She is starting to _stir."

*

*

* * *

*

*

"I really don't like this idea," Asuka says, "It's too soon. We've had…what is it, a week? A week since she got out of the hospital?"

"And two weeks since her miscarriage," Misato responds, standing next to her on Dogma, "Ritsuko cleared her. She's made a remarkably fast psychological recovery, mainly due to Aida waiting on her hand and foot, and Rei asked to do the test."

Asuka shakes her head, muttering something teutonic. At least something good has been happening over the week. Ariel is coming with her tomrrow for those tests Akagi asked for…another change. Another great change of a dozen years, Dr. Akagi wanting to help Rei, not hate her.

"When did everyone here get so human?" she asks.

"Singularity event making us all see our mommy issues?"

"Yeah, that."

*

*

* * *

*

*

They hold hands on the catwalk before Unit 00. Her plug suit is slightly bulkier, gauntlets instead of gloves, her shoulders more padded, bits of white armor around her waist. Still, it leaves little to the imagination, and every male technician seeing Kensuke Aida and Major Ayanami kissing before she ascends the final steps can only think '_That lucky bastard.'_

"Be careful," he says.

"Always," she responds.

Their foreheads touch, and he retreats as she heads towards the Plug. His shoves his hands into his pockets, heading out the door, heading for Dogma to watch. His girl.

_His girl._

Right now, even with the tragedies, Kensuke Aida considers himself the luckiest man alive. And if he can pull this off, his current plan, he's going to consider himself even luckier.

*

*

* * *

*

*

It smells like blood, making her hair stand slightly on edge. She had to do this, she rationalizes. Work through the pain with routine while Dr. Akagi considers her next step. But still…maybe she has found it. Her purpose behind Eva. Beyond NERV.

Her eye camera shows her an image of Dogma, of Kensuke smiling, standing next to Asuka. Asuka, now her friend, if only through hardship. And Aida, something…she has never had before. All her clumsiness, her…offness, that turned away so many. Her straightforwardness that nearly scared away her brother, especially when she attempted, disastrously, to become intimate with him.

It only drew him closer. What is it the others call it? What is the term they would use to describe the two of them, a term which she has so long tried to find…

Ah yes.

Love.

She is in love with him. And that, Rei thinks as she clasps the butterfly controls, makes her truly, wonderfully, warmly happy-

*

*

* * *

*

*

"Sync rating at…84%," Asuka says, raising an eyebrow as Misato elbows Kensuke with a smile, "Damn. Beats my records. Rei? How are you feeling?"

No response. The Eva stands up straight in the Cage. Its eye glows.

"Something's wrong," one of the technicians announces, "Unit 00 is cutting external controls! Telemetry is going backwards!"

*

*

* * *

*

*

The plug darkens. Her eyes go wide as the presence, so long suppressed, hidden, awakens in response to her moment of perfect happiness. Hands clasp around her throat as she stares into Her eyes, everything turning blinding white as the Eva shudders and screams at her-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

**GOD. DAMN. DOLL.**

The scaffolds fall, Unit 00 rising to its full height, swinging its arms out as technicians scramble out of the way. Its eye flashes, shining yellow, then red, a low rumble escaping it as it pulls free from the restraints of the wall with the scream of tearing metal.

*

*

* * *

*

*

"Unit 00 has completely lost control! Pattern _SEPIA!_"

At the bridge, on Dogma, Misato watches with wide eyed horror.

"Berserker!"

*

*

* * *

*

*

The final latches around the jaw unlock. Throwing its head back, Unit 00 roars before driving its fist into the Cage walls and charging into the base.

Screaming, shrieking, it barrels through the bays, deflecting small arms fire from the defense systems. Sniffing the air, it dives through the floor, thousands of tons of metal and concrete thrown around it, filling entire levels with smoke and dust.

It is not random. It is not wild.

It is searching, and it is out for blood.

*

*

* * *

*

*

A quick exit, and she runs full tilt through the base. She knows where she is going, knows what she has to do. She swore, _swore,_ that she would never do this again, not after what it did to her, what it did to her mother, what it nearly did to her daughter. But she read the reports, knows the truth.

There is only one reason Unit 00 would go berserk. Because the old insane bitch at the core of the Eva could never stand the idea that maybe, just _maybe,_ the First Child had something to live for, and it was going to take it away.

And she has had enough of that from the whole damned lot of them.

Standing before the silent visage, she balls her hands into fists, holding the old antiques in her palm.

"Ready?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

"Shit," Misato growls, "Get the Fourth Child and the pilots for 09 and 11 prepped! I want Unit 00 restrained and I want the Entry Plug cut out of that Bitch's neck! That thing does _not_ leave my base!"

She turns.

"Asuka!"

Only to find the scientist gone. Swearing, she sees Aida gone as well.

"Where the Hell is Doctor Sohryu?!"

The screen flips in front of them, showing her location, quickly running along corridors and catwalks to a particular location. Gritting her teeth, Misato swears, loudly. She's either going to kill that girl…

Or give her a medal.

"MAGI has predicted Unit 00's path," a technician announces, "On screen now! It's heading towards Floor A-7…it's heading for the Enclosure!"

"That's where Unit 01 is," Misato says to herself, "Why's it after a dead Eva?!"

*

*

* * *

*

*

He waits. Waits in front of the dormant form of Unit 01, waiting for her.

"Father!"

Gendo Ikari turns. Eyes narrow and he swears. This complicates matters.

"There's something wrong with Unit 00," Shinji says, grabbing his arm, "It's heading this way!"

"I know," Gendo responds, "It's coming for _me. _Get out of here. Now."

The floor shudders. Fist first, it bursts through the floor, landing in a crouch, rising and centering on the two of them with a single glowing eye.

Straightening his arm, the weapon falls into it. Raising his right arm, he centers the gun on Unit 00's eye, the special bullet, crafted with a piece of red crystal at its point, locking into place. Gendo Ikari has a contingency plan for everything.

Even berserk ex lovers.

"Hello, Naoko," he says, "The years haven't been kind to you."

He fires. The bullet passes through AT fields, slamming into the optics…and missing. Swearing, Gendo backs away, Unit 00 roaring as it centers on the two Ikaris, tearing the catwalk between its hands on either side of them-

Until a red fist impacts its face, sending it reeling back before the two are caught by the other hand, deposited on the floor a hundred feet below. They stare at it as it slams a haymaker into Unit 00's face, driving it towards the wall.

Two hundred feet tall. Red and white with green highlights, four green eyes glowing magnificent emerald.

"Unit 02," Gendo says with a grin.

"Oh God," Shinji says, "_ASUKA!"_

_*_

_*_

_

* * *

_

*

*

Inside the Entry Plug of Unit 02, she roars, her hair wafting around her face in the LCL as she drives the Eva forward, hand flattened against Unit 00's face as she slams the back of its head into the far wall. Still arguing with her, she over rules her. She is _better_ than her, a _better person,_ a _better mother,_ a _stronger will._

It is not the same as in the olden days. She does not ignore the will of Kyoko Zeppelin Sohryu.

Now, she accepts it, weighs it, and _puts it in her place._

Unit 02 shoulder rushes the orange giant, driving them both through wall after wall, people scrambling for cover as Asuka weighs the necessary evils and decides to take this cat fight outside.

Like riding a bicycle. Like an old lover, like a limb missing that she never knew was gone. And most of all, the only reason she can do this, the only reason she can hold the advantage against a pissed off 200' tall hag is because of what Rei told her twelve years ago.

Because she opened herself to her Eva.

*

*

* * *

*

*

The outer wall cracks and bursts out, the two Evas falling hundreds of feet before slamming into the pavement outside of Ramiel. Clenching a fist, a supersonic set of knuckles slams into Unit 00's jaw, breaking teeth and armor and making a crater in the street.

"Misato," she yells, "Eject the Entry Plug!"

Hands grasp Unit 02's throat, Asuka grasping as her Eva's back slams into the ground, gritting her teeth and narrowing her eyes, sending a mental signal as bursts of air send black spikes into Unit 00's chest, making it reel back, hissing as Asuka drives the Eva's foot into its stomach.

"Fine," Asuka growls, "I'll just cut her out!"

The latch on the right pylon opens, a long hatch folding out and extending into its Progressive Knife. The blade hums as Asuka grabs it, activating it, and with a swing shreds the chest armor, driving the blast with a underhand stab into Unit 00 shoulder and painting the street with red blood.

One hand grabs the hatch, yanking it off Unit 00's neck as jets fire and the white cylinder launches, Unit 00 batting away Unit 02 and chasing after it with a howl. The Entry Plug bounces off an apartment building, bouncing off the street before resting against a parked series of cars.

"It's chasing after her," Asuka yells, tackling Unit 00, grabbing it with a headlock as she sees something running out of the corner of her eye…

"Aida," she growls, "You _stupid bastard!_"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Running as fast as his legs will take him, he dodges under the stomping feet of the two Evangelions. To his credit, he ignores them entirely. He used to be fascinated. Years ago, he'd find a perch on a rooftop to watch the giant robot tussle from a distance, maybe with a soda or tea or something like that, and record the entire thing.

Time changes people.

"_REI!_" he screams, sprinting towards the plug, "_Asuka, hold it off!_"

"**Easier said than done, pencil neck!**"

He skids to a halt in front of the plug, grabbing the handles of the manual release, driving through the burning of his palms. He pulls and twists, the latch opening and spilling amber liquid over the street as he jumps in, cradling the unconscious woman and running out just as an orange foot comes down on the plug. Running, he takes cover with her inside the closest store, checking for a pulse, checking for breathing, finding both.

*

*

* * *

*

*

"_I've got Rei! Finish it off!"_

"Misato's going to be pissed at me for this," Asuka says, grabbing Unit 00 by the neck and slamming its back into one of the base's supports, "But I think we have enough backup to say _good bye, BITCH!_"

Flipping the knife in her free hand, Unit 02 drives it into Unit 00's core. Sparks fly, scorching the front armor of Unit 02, Unit 00 struggling, screaming, clawing at Unit 02's visage as the orange and white mecha spasms.

Placing its other hand on the pommel, the red Evangelion drives it deeper, cracking the core, finally thrusting it into the hilt. Screaming, grunting, baying like a wounded animal, fingers almost in Unit 02's eyes, Unit 00 struggles…

Until the core finally cracks and shatters. Limbs go limp, the light leaving the mecha's eye. Pulling the knife out, Unit 02 only watches impassively as Unit 00 collapses in a dead heap on the street, before the final bit of power leaves its batteries and it kneels, shutting down.

*

*

* * *

*

*

The hatch opens, Asuka climbing out. Her blouse and skirt are ruined and will probably have to be burnt and her hair smells like blood. Unit 02 is properly restrained once more, and giving it a sideways glance, she mouths a small, quiet thanks to it. She is no stranger to hardship, and will be damned if she would allow Rei, _Rei_ of all people to suffer. Especially for the sins of their parents.

"Mama!"

Eyes wide, she drops to her knee and grabs Ariel as she runs into her arms, looking at her wide eyed.

"What are you doing here?" she asks.

"I picked her up," Shinji says, walking up to her, "We saw most of it. From a distance."

"That looked like so much fun!" Ariel squeals, "Did you really pilot the big robot?"

"Yes, and I'm _never doing it again,_" Asuka responds, narrowing her eyes at her daughter, finding herself despite the situation unable to get mad, "And neither are you!"

"Aw…"

"No buts! You're going to be a scientist or a artist or something! Your Mama was a giant robot pilot to put you through college!"

_Gott,_ she thinks, _Am I giving her the 'when I was your age' speech? How old am I?_

She looks over to Shinji, finding him smiling and leaning on the railings.

_Well, maybe that's not so bad after all…_

_*_

_*_

_

* * *

_

*

*

Sitting at his desk, he places the gun in the desk and closes it, calling up several screens as he takes his normal position. Hands tented, fingers in front of his face. Gendo Ikari watches Rei's recovery room, as the side door open and Ritsuko leans on his chair.

"So, you have multiple plans," she says, "Some which Rei knows about, some which she does not. Does that mean I'm the only one you've given full confidence to?"

"It does, Doctor."

"I'm flattered," she says with a small, knowing smile, "Did you count on Rei's miscarriage?"

"No," he says, a small tinge on his voice, "But it has been worked in. Yui appeared to Rei in a dream state. She has helped her recover, to an extent. The plan proceeds accordingly."

"And I may be able to figure out a way around Rei's problem," she says, "Shame Unit 00 had to die. I would have preferred my mother's final death to be less…"

"Painful?"

"Memorable. More ignomious. Forgotten."

She raises an eyebrow, shrugging.

"But it's not like anyone liked her," she continues, "So it seems Rei has found life outside of Eva and…oh, this should be good."

*

*

* * *

*

*

The hospital room door cracks open, Rei opening an eye, and a small smile appears on her face as Kensuke sneaks in, taking his place by her side. It is a good thing he remembered to shave in the week between the last time she was here. She would hate for him to let himself go on her account.

"I was not injured," she says to his surprise, "At least, not severely. Unit 00 has gone berserk enough times for me to react accordingly."

He relaxes, and smiles.

"Well, it's not anymore," he says, "I just finished talking with Misato. Unit 00's dead. You're no longer the First Child. I'm…I'm sorry, Rei."

"Don't be," she says with a small, knowing smile, "I finally have something beyond Eva. I have…something to live for."

He grins, taking her hand, stroking her knuckles.

"I…wanted to do this somewhere better," he says, "Somewhere…I guess more atmospheric. You know? Cause this is kind of embarassing."

She raises an eyebrow as he walks over, helping her sit up in her hospital bed. Careful not to disturb the wires, he smiles, laughing to himself. Taking her hands in his own, he licks his dry lips, swallowing down his parched throat as he looks her in the eyes, the crimson, exotic orbs with more knowledge and life than people twice her age.

"Rei," he says, "I've known you since we were teenagers…but I've only really known you for a few weeks, but in that time…we got off to one of the weirdest starts I've ever seen. I know, most people would go running for the hills, but it's been incredible and wild and…I want to see where this ride ends up."

He rumages through his pockets, grinning sheepishly, her head tilting in curiosity.

"It's…our relationship's weird," he continues, "And we're both probably insane. But in a world like this we crazy people have to stick together, you know? I can't promise you everything. I know how much you wanted to be a Mom…and that also made me realize how much I wanted to be a father. But not just any father. I wanted to be the father our your…of _our_ children, and I don't know if doing this will help or not, but it isn't just that and it's that I just want to be there for you every second of…"

She places a finger on his lips. She smiles, faintly, looking him in the eye.

"Kensuke," she says, "What are you saying?"

Which is when he brings it up. The small little box. Popping it open, he reveals a little gold band. Simple, but elegant. Just like her.

"Rei Ayanami," he says, "Will you marry me?"

Eyes go wide, staring at the ring. She goes from the ring to Kensuke, the hopeful smile on his face. For a brief, silent moment, the world stops. Nothing moves. Just the sound of her breathing and the ticking of the beeping machines.

Until finally, she lunges into his arms and kisses him full on the lips. Wires disconnect and machines fall over, the steady hum of a flatline and alarms echoing through the infirmary as they kiss in perfect silence, a perfect moment broken by Shinji, Asuka and Ariel rushing into the room, followed by Misato and half the infirmary team, finding them off the bed, Rei hanging from him with a wide, toothy smile. She takes the box a laughing grin on her face as she tightens her hold on him. Never ever, _ever_ intending on letting him go.

"You know," Asuka says, "This means Aida's going to be your _brother in law._"

Shinji shrugs.

"Nothing's perfect."


	12. Hedgehog Party Ball

Checking the small, hand held device about the size of a cellular phone, Shinji Ikari, Special Inspector to NERV, follows the GPS signal given off by his coworker/girlfriend without really considering the circumstances behind it. Of course, he's been a little concerned lately, partially due to her recent adventure piloting Unit 02 against a batshit berserk Unit 00. One of his major concerns at this point is the possibility of her getting 'back in the saddle' as it is. With Unit 00 gone and, of course, Unit 01 being a giant purple paperweight, Asuka has the most effective experience piloting an Evangelion.

Target found.

Looking up, he sees that he is outside the woman's locker room. Please, he tells herself, let her not be modelling a plugsuit.

He knocks, hearing an affirmative that everyone is, in fact, decent, and walks in. Asuka is there, but in one of her long skirts and a pale red blouse, pushing her glasses up her nose as he enters. The other occupant is a girl of about fourteen, not particularly well developed, with dark brown hair and in a green, black highlighted plugsuit. He remembers her. She reminds him of Hikari when she was that age.

"I was just finishing up Chidori's physical," Asuka says, regarding the primary pilot of Unit 11, "Chidori, do you remember Inspector Ikari?"

The girl shakes her head…and stops. She stares at Shinji, eyes going wide as she gives off a small, admiring squeal.

"Oh my God," she says, "You're Inspector Ikari? _The_ Shinji Ikari?"

Shinji sighs, shoulders slumping. Here it comes.

"We study your battle footage in training all the time," Chidori continues, clapping her hands together in awe struck glee, "_The_ Third Child! Your tactics against the 14th Angel are considered textbook on close quarters Evangelion combat!"

"It wasn't exactly tactical," Shinji mutters.

"I was an Eva pilot to, you know," Asuka says.

"Oh…oh, right. Sorry, Doctor Sohryu."

Chidori shrugs and turns back to Shinji as Asuka rolls her eyes.

"Inspector, the other pilots and I would really, _really_ love if you would give us a guest lecture on our tactics class," she continues, "Especially since Major Ayanami's retirement from piloting, a veteran pilot of your caliber would be like we were visited by a rock star!"

He sighs, scratching the back of his head. No one will this end well, he considers. Either he disappoints a kid, or he gets on Asuka's bad side.

_Well, I've been there before._

"Okay," he says, "Give me a time, I'll come. Not sure how much I can really tell you. I never got trained."

She squeals again.

"And you're a natural talent!" she yells, "This will be _great!_ Thank you so much!"

She runs out, giggling and squeeing the entire way.

"I'll cook dinner," he says, sliding towards her and wrapping his arms around her waist, "I try not to disappoint impressionable young girls."

"You have fans," she says, "Don't you remember when you thought the whole world hated you?"

"I eventually figured out I was actually attractive for a kid my age."

"It's the robot," she says, folding her arms, "Chicks dig giant robots."

-

-

**Chapter 12: Hedgehog Party Ball**

**-**

**-**

"So," he says, hands around her waist, as she rests her arms on his shoulders with a smile, "I was actually worried about you."

"Me?"

"You piloting again," he says, nodding, "When your locator pointed towards you in the locker room, I thought you were, well…"

"You thought I was getting into a Plugsuit," she says with a small, mischievious grin, "Skin tight, revealing, latex…you sure you don't _want_ me to pilot?"

He blushes, grinning, drawing her closer.

"I'm liking the way you think," he chuckles, "So, just checking up on the pilots, then? Keeping them off of me?"

Their lips touch, briefly, Asuka smirking as she pulls at his tie.

"Actually," she says, "There's something I did want to try out…"

*

*

* * *

*

*

_Shuffleshuffle_

Hands press against the locker, a quick rustling of cloth as they both giggle, Asuka grinning as he adjusts the zipper on the skirt.

"There's cameras in here," she whispers.

"Yeah, and?"

"Your _father_ is probably watching this."

_Zip._

Hikes up the back of the skirt, nibbling her ear, wrapping his hands around her waist as she laughs.

"Then it is all going according to the scenario," he whispers.

Belt unbuckling, shoes coming off, more kissing as his hands wrap around hers. She gasps, cooing, as the clumsy fumbling begins to yield fruit. Fingers interlace with his, a soft cooing escaping her lips.

"He's taping this," she whispers, gripping the locks with whitening knuckles.

"Indeed. As it should be."

"Oh God," she says, "Oh God, this is _turning me on._"

"Hn."

"Stop that," she hisses through gritted teeth, hair falling over her eyes, "I am going to _hurt_ you if you quote the Commander during locker room sex!"

He leans in, kissing her on the neck, fingers moving down as she gasps, eyes closing as she grips the handles of the lockers, both of them laughing…

And the doors to the locker room open.

The footsteps lightly tap on the floor as she walks to her locker, opening it and examining the contents. Raising an eyebrow, she turns slightly to the lockers behind her, and clears her throat.

"Doctor Sohryu," she says, "Inspector Ikari. I have already seen both of you naked, so you would not embarrass me if you were both undressed."

A shuffle and hasty zip, and Asuka and Shinji both duck out from behind the lockers. Shinji turns beat red, Asuka flushed as well, staring at both of them and particularly Shinji as for details of when he's been naked with Rei.

"Sorry," Shinji says, "Rei, what are you doing here?"

"Retrieving my Plugsuit for future use," she says, taking the white one piece and draping it over her arm.

"But…Unit 00's gone."

"It is not for piloting," she says with a small, knowing smile, "It is for…the honeymoon."

With that, she turns and walks out.

"Kinky," she says.

"Yeah…don't want to think about that with my sister."

She shrugs, about to say something about everyone having their tastes, when he slams her back against the lockers, hiking up her skirt as they kiss. She wraps one arm around his neck, the other hand fumbling with something at waist level as his eyes go wide.

"Now," she says, bare foot tracing up his calf, "Where _were_ we?"

*

*

* * *

*

*

In the past three weeks, his relationship with her has progressed from the uneasy dance of 'will they or won't they' to 'will they get caught doing it in public, and if so by who?' This is not to say they've been going at it every hour or tearing each others clothes off in her living room in front of her five year old daughter.

They're not teenagers anymore. As damaged psyches as they hold, they know better than to be irresponsible.

"I've realized I've been walking around here for years, and I can't really tell you who all the pilots are," Shinji says, walking out of the lift as it reaches Central Dogma's level, Asuka next to him, "I don't really talk with any of them except for Touji and Rei."

"They're also half your age," she responds, "That would be creepy."

"We were half Misato's age and she was constantly around us."

"She was a hot woman. You're not. She has a better excuse."

Standing at attention as the screens shift to a large dark green lizard with a prounounced lower jaw, resembling a tyrannosaur crossed with an iguana, roaring as it downs Jet Alone Prime and eyes Tokyo-3.

"Is that Godzilla?" Shinji asks.

"Resembles him," Misato says, "She says, "Actually more resembles that shitty American Godzilla movie from the 90's. We react accordingly."

She clicks the walkie talkie.

"Unit 11. Fire the Positron Cannon."

Everyone looks away as the screen flashes blinding white, save for Commander Ikari at the highest bridge, who merely pushes his glasses back up his nose. When the light clears, they are glad they are not there directly, as they imagine the stench of burning lizard is filling the air.

"Well, good to see brute force still works," Misato says, as the screen clears to show two smoking lizard legs, "Is it radioactive or what? Cause we could so put that on the market."

*

*

* * *

*

*

There are a total of ten chosen Evangelion pilots for Units 06, 07, 09, 11, and the newly repaired and almost ready Unit 10. In the interests of redundancy, there are multiple pilots for each Eva, save for Unit 03, which only really responds to Touji. They are kids. The oldest is sixteen years old, and he's been doing this for three years like it's an after school club.

They also lack something that the first set of Pilots had. What is it, Shinji asks himself.

Oh, yes.

Trauma.

Standing at the podium in the front of the half circle lecture hall, the same one he remembers him and Asuka getting chewed out in when they f___ed up against the Seventh Angel, he clears his throat. With no pause, all ten pilots give him their complete attention. The female pilots, he notices, look at him the exact same way Asuka once looked at Kaji, which is also making him _severely_ uncomfortable.

"So," he says, clearing his throat again, "I am Shinji Ikari, Special Inspector of NERV. At your fellow pilot's request-"

Chidori's ever-present grin goes wider.

"…I am here to give you a guest lecture on Evangelion combat," he continues, "If you've read my personnel files, you know I am the Commander's son. When I was fourteen years old, the Commander put me in Unit 01 with _no_ training and made me fight the Third Angel. For my trouble, the Third Angel broke Unit 01's arm and then drove an energy spike through it's _brain._ It then went _berserk_ and _leveled_ a good portion of Tokyo-3."

He sips his coffee. Good coffee. The kids are taking notes.

"The Fourth Angel impaled Unit 01 through the torso with energy tentacles and I disobeyed orders to kill it," he says, "The Fifth Angel roasted me in the cockpit. I went into cardiac arrest. Um…hm…the Seventh Angel smacked around me and Doctor Sohryu before we tried a plan based on rhythmic dancing to kill it, and the tenth Angel basically dropped on me from orbit. Any questions so far?"

One in the back, shakily.

"Yes?"

"Um…Inspector," the boy says, looking from side to side, "Was piloting Unit 01 always so….traumatic?"

He laughs. Years ago, the laugh would have been bitter, but time and hindsight make some things hilarious.

"Oh, yeah," he says, "I mean, we did good. We saved the world. Problem was, we were kids. You think the Commander's rough with you guys now?"

They nod.

"Okay," he says, gripping the podium, "Let me tell you how Captain Suzuhara got his artificial arm and leg…"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Try as she might, Misato can not successfully pull off his father's look. Even with hands tented, eyes glaring at him, he still remembers her as the bottle fairy who's idea of 'the Talk' involved _Debbie Does Dallas._ Still, he knows she's upset with him. He knows she's angry, and he also knows exactly why.

It is an accomplishment to make an entire room of trained pilots break into tears.

"You told them about the Thirteenth Angel," she says.

"Yeah…"

"About how it possessed Unit 03," she adds.

"…yeah…"

"About how the Commander activated the Dummy Plug and made you watch as it tore Unit 03 limb from limb, and then crushed the Entry Plug as an _object lesson_ to you."

"…in all defense, I don't think any of them will back talk to the Commander ever again…"

"And then crushed you under the _LCL_ because you were going to _wreck the Geofront._"

He shrugs. Sighing, he folds his hands in his lap and looks at his former guardian and long time friend, genuine regret on his face. And worry. Worry for _them._

"Misato, they don't realize what can happen," he says, "It's not a game. Look at what happened to us over the War. If anything, I don't think those kids are going to ask me back to sugar coat it."

Misato nods. She tents her fingers, sitting back, pursing her lips and leveling her gaze at her surrogate child.

"Except you are," she says, "As punishment. You're going to do a series of ten lectures to the Pilots on your experience as an Evangelion pilot."

He chokes, glaring at her.

"Don't sugar coat it," she says, raising her hand to silence him, "But don't…and I repeat, _don't…_terrify them. Yeah, it was traumatic. Yeah, I _drank_ myself to sleep every night until you were _sixteen_ to cope with the fact that I put you in that thing. Yeah, we _messed up_ so many times. But waving this all in their face and screaming, 'This is gonna happen to YOU' isn't going to help you or _them._"

"Learn from my experiences?" he asks.

"Damn straight, skippy. Towards the end you _were_ the trump card. You went in there with no training and saved the world more times than I can count. So tell them the bad, yeah. But don't pretend you never did anything good."

He sucks his teeth, sitting back.

"Like what?" he asks.

"Talk with Ms. Suzuhara lately?"

"Yeah, why?"

"What do you think would've happened if you let Rei pilot it?" she asks, "You had some control. Rubble fell on her, and it took three years for her to heal. If a near dead girl was in control, though? Chances are the _Eva_ would have fallen on her. Shinji, these kids have it better than you ever had. But still, you did things they never will. What'd Chidori say about the 14th?"

"They study what I did," he mutters.

"So do we," Misato says with a small grin, "Because even after you walked away, even after you cursed this all, you came back. You got in there, you charged through the base and stopped it right before it was going to kill us all. You were crazy and brave and you were not going to quit, and you know how your mother saved you?"

He nods.

"She did that because you did something so incredible that she couldn't _help_ but get out of that damn core and _want to help_."

He nods, sighing. Hands on his knees, he nods, looking up at her and grinning.

"Okay," he says, "I'll try."

*

*

* * *

*

*

"Ladies and gentlemen, who can tell me why the first three Evangelions acted like they did?"

A blonde haired girl, also German from what he remembers, raises her hand with an 'Oo! Oo!'

"Yes, Samantha?"

Get to know their names, Misato said, Think of them as people. I know we never did when you were that age.

"Because they contained remnants of their original test pilots," she says, "The psychological structures allowed them to connect and Synch to higher degrees than the modern Evangelions do."

"Correct," Shinji says, leaning on the podium, grinning slightly as he looks over his 'students', "As Evangelion pilots, you have clearance enough to have the complete history of the Evangelion program at your fingertips. Units 00, 01, and 02 are different from your Units because they contained, for lack of a better word, souls. Which also made them dangerous."

Another raises his hand. Kysuke, from the northern part of Japan.

"Is that why Unit 00 went berserk?" he asks, "We understand that Unit 00 had a particularly bad history with Major Ayanami. Does that mean the 'souls' of the Evas retained some level of awareness?"

"Some more than others," Shinji responds, pushing up on the podium as the ten pilots quickly scribble down notes, "Unit 01, as we have seen, was capable of indepenent action, especially after absorbing the 14th Angel's S2 organ. And there was Unit 02's actions recently."

Chidori raises her hand. He nods to her, gesturing for her to talk.

"Why are our Units different?"

"Yours are based on recovered remains of the MP Eva series," he responds, "The Cores, or more or less the hearts and brains of the Evas were recovered following the Blastwave event. Each of your Evangelions contains the copied mental programs of…"

Another boy in the back holds up his hand. Hadji, from NERV-India, and something of an Angel War buff. Reminds him of Kensuke from those years back.

"Yes?"

"The core intelligence of the current Eva series are the copied mental essences of the Fifth Child/17th Angel, Kaworu Nagisa."

"Correct. As you can see from the personnel file of Mr. Nagisa, he was an extremely outgoing young man," Shinji continues, "Which means you kids have an easier time synching with your Evas than I ever did. Psychological profiles of the elder Dr. Akagi, Dr. Ikari, and Dr. Zeppelin-Sohryu point towards…yes, Hadji?"

"Psychological instabilities."

"Exactly. Okay, so we're going to go over a particular Angel today."

He clicks the remote, the projector coming to life and illuminating a hologram hanging over them. Some 'oos' and 'ahs' come from the young pilots as it coalesces into an Angel at least a few miles wide.

"This is the Tenth Angel," Shinji says, "Designated Sahaquiel. To deal with this one, then-Major Katsuragi came up with a plan to…"

*

*

* * *

*

*

Sitting at the desk in his apartment, Shinji pours over files. As Special Inspector, his security clearance is something just under Misato's, which gives him access to more than a little fodder for his lectures. The Tenth Angel lecture went well. That was one of the great moments. The three Children working as a team, saving the world, and as a bonus his father congratulated him. An empty gesture, yes, to manipulate him. He can tell nowadays the difference. Now, when they talk…he never congratulates him. Not openly.

Shinji accepted he never will, because he's not that sort of person. For him to say words like, 'I love you' or 'I'm proud of you' would be an empty gesture because Gendo Ikari does not _use those terms._ He shows his affection by speaking with him openly. By changing circumstances to benefit Shinji. To center plans around him because Gendo Ikari knows that Shinji can pull these things off.

That is the fulcrum of the relationship. It is never about love or affection. It is always about respect and understanding of each other. That is the case of Gendo and Shinji Ikari.

Arms drape around his shoulders and he looks over his shoulder to see Asuka, mischevious smile on her face as she leans in and pecks him on the lips.

"Well, hello there, Professor," she says.

"You heard?"

"After traumatizing them the first time," she says with a grin, "Glad to see you went back for more. So, how's it going?"

"I never realized these kids look up to me."

"Twelve years ago I would have said because you just wanted to get the girls alone with you," she says, turning his swivel chair around, "But really? It's because you did that job better than me and Ayanami ever did. Rei was…resigned to it…and I _screwed it up_ so many times."

"I'm pretty sure you would've managed," he says, squeezing her hand, "Asuka, you started free-falling after the Twelfth. After I beat your sync score and held it over you. You trained for this since you were four. I could have you come in and lecture them for hours about how the Evas work and what to do in a fight. I was lucky half the time."

She sits in his lap. No empty gesture, draping her arms on his shoulders as she leans in and presses her lips against his. He sighs, grinning, pressing his forehead against hers as they go silent for long moments, past hanging between them.

"There's a lot I could tell them," he says, "Some of it's good for them to know…but a lot of it…a lot of it I think should stay buried. I've told them about the Thirteenth and the Tenth. I'm going to talk about the Seventh tomorrow."

"Victory through synchronized dance?"

"Mr. Kaji must have had a rich inner life," he chuckles, "Stupidest plan I ever heard, but it worked."

She nods. Thinking of asking what would have happened if they acting upon those deep seeded feelings those years ago, when they were forced to spend every moment together for a week.

"Asuka," he sasy, "Answer me this honestly."

"Okay."

He pauses. Thinks of the words, how to sugar coat it. Fails, miserably, and asks directly.

"Do you want me to tell them about Arael?"

Makes sure to pronounce it correctly, so it isn't about her daughter, but the _thing._ The thing that hung miles in orbit while it ripped apart her psyche and made her weep like a baby in front of the entire command staff. Made her hate herself more than she ever had before, made her stop eating, run away, and wander around before she finally lapsed in to a coma.

"No," she says. Voice barely above a whisper as she closes her eyes.

"Okay…"

"Because I'll tell them," she says.

Looking up at her, his eyes go slightly wide. Sighing, he pulls her closer, hands wrapping around her waist.

"You're not running away from it," she says, "So I might as well not either. How can I let you take all the credit?"

"You're sure?"

"I don't…_like_ talking about it," she says, blinking back tears, "What it _did_ to me. But if that sort of thing happens again, if there is _something_ like that monster out there, I couldn't live with myself if I let those kids go through what we did. Right?"

He nods, closing his eyes as she leans in and kisses him. Arms wrap around each other, holding her close as she relaxes against him. More than anything, more than the kissing, flirting, random lovemaking, they hold each other. Two wounded people in need of the other for those times when the nightmares come close to the surface.

"So," he says, after a while passes, "I was also thinking of having Rei help, to. You know, tell them what Death is like."

"After you tell them about being eaten by Unit 01?"

"Figured we'd do it chronologically…"

She giggles, turning into a laugh. A sense of humor. One of the greater changes he's made over the decade. The ability to take the trauma they've gone through and take a step back, laugh at it if only out of defense and necessity. She leans in, kissing him, deeper this time. Putting a bit of her tongue behind it, a bit of her body behind it, pressing herself against him. She shows him that she _means_ it.

"Hey," she says.

"Mm?"

"We've got a choice. Ari's going to be home soon. We've got…twenty minutes. So…we can either get a quick an' dirty round in or make dinner."

"Sex or responsibility?"

"I'm remembering how many times we ordered takeout when Misato and Kaji had their little get togethers," she says with a grin, "What do you think?"

He grins. Another of their tests, seeing if the years have changed them at all. Taken impulsive children on all fronts, from him all the way to his father, and changed them to something more responsible.

Something more human.

"I'll get my wok."

"I really do have you house trained."

*

*

* * *

*

*

With a sigh, shrugging off her overcoat, Ritsuko Akagi walks into her house and finds the lights already on. Rare that her spouse does not work nights, but she remembers that her significant other said dinner would be made for her tonight, instead of being take out.

"I'm home," she says, kicking off her shoes.

"Welcome home!"

She walks into the small kitchen, sniffing the aroma of frying noodles, spying her housekeeper/spouse/lover slaving over the stove, apron on and smiling.

"I had a later afternoon than expected," the cook says, "So I couldn't really do much in the way of shopping. Most of this's leftovers I'm being inventive with."

"Working on the fly's always been your strong point," she says with a small, wicked grin, "So, you heard?"

"Shinji's giving lectures to the new Eva pilot crop? About damn time if you ask me. And the rumors about him and Asuka?"

"True. They make a nice couple, and he's turning into quite a capable father. It's been…five weeks since Asuka came back. They managed to work out a lot in that time."

"Good for them."

Spatula works the noodles, swearing lightly as some burns.

"They deserve it. Both of them went through Hell, and if it took them a dozen years to find their happiness, it's a dozen years too long. I'm happy for them both, even if I don't get to see them."

She sighs. Again with this train of thought.

"She's not _mad,_ mad at you," she says, "If she really was, she'd never have moved on with Hyuga. Their relationship's a lot more healthy than yours ever was."

"And ours?"

"We're fine," she says, walking behind him, wrapping her arms around his broad chest, "How long've we been married?"

"Ten years."

"So…two before that, I save your life," she says, "We start becoming serious after the Impact…"

"After everyone gets a second chance."

"…and then we get married. And we've been together since," she continues, "Tell you what. Rei is getitng married."

"Buh?"

"Seriously," she says with a smile, "You come with me to the wedding. You get to see if Misato's really mad at you, or just playing with it to keep some connection to her past. Everyone gets together and we have a good time."

He turns, wrapping his arms around her waist as he turns off the heat. That roguish smile, not an act anymore, some bits of white creeping into that black ponytail and those, deep, knowing eyes staring into her soul. Showing some teeth, locking his hands on the small of his back, he chuckles.

"Why is it I can never say no to you?" Ryouji Kaji asks.

"Because you're a smarter man than you give yourself credit for. And I'm always right."


	13. Parental Responsibilities

Marie Olivierte-Sohryu cautiously walks down the airport terminal walkway, not minding the shuffling behind her. She is happy to come. Her other guests, not so much. Of course, things are always tense. _Always_ tense. The report came to them a week ago, with the full details, being next of kin and all. Heavily edited for exact details or because the workings of the technology are so damn mystical but…

Well, they always though Ariel was a little Angel.

And what do you know? She _was._

"Gott, what are we stumbling into?" she asks herself, quietly. Husband is with the kids in Germany, watching over them. She has to deal with the two elder children she brought along with her; Gregor and Claire Sohryu, her stepfather and harlot of a mother, respectively.

_Don't let her be bruised or injured. Please let Ariel be healthy and well fed. Please, Gott, don't let this be a disaster and I haven't spoken to her in three weeks and-_

"Auntie Marie!"

A red headed blur runs up and jumps into her arms. Blinking back surprise, she stares into the eyes of her niece. Ariel, cheeks plump and eyes bright, dressed in a very, _very_ new blue, white frilled dress that matches her eyes beautifully. Healthy, hale, and happy beyond measure, Marie finally releases that breath, holding the girl and twirling around, laughing.

"She's a runner," the familiar voice says.

Letting Ariel down, Marie's smile goes wider when her step sister approaches. Smiling, grinning, hands folded behind her as she almost skips along, in a long skirt and sweater, glasses on her nose and laughter on her breath. And then she sees him, to. Slightly rumpled pants and shirt and tie, grinning from ear to ear, he walks up to Asuka…and takes her hand, fingers intertwined with hers.

"Mr. Ikari," Marie says.

"Mrs. Olivierte," Shinji responds, "Welcome back. I see your guests are lagging behind."

"They'll pick themselves up eventually," Marie says, and without preamble walks to Asuka and wraps her arms around her in a tight, loving hug, "Oh, Gott. Look at _you._ You have _so many_ details to fill me up on."

"Like what you see?" Asuka asks, returning the hug with a small, knowing smile.

"Like it?" Marie asks, "Look at you. Look at her. Look at him. You have no idea how happy I am."

-

-

**Chapter 13: Parental Responsibility**

-

-

After muted greetings, the elder Sohryus demanded to be escorted to NERV-1. As Special Inspector, Shinji already had a stretch limo arranged. After all, Subdirector Harrison Sohryu, second in command of NERV-2 Germany, was a very important man. He did not come here to spend time with his daughter or coddle his grand daughter. He had _important things_ to do.

A man who would distinctly invoke the image of 'over the hill', there was a time when he was handsome. Debonair. Now, he is overweight, with receding brown hair and brown eyes, in every way average save for the perfectly pressed navy blue suit and the silver crested walking cane he always carries in his right hand. He looks like a child playing dress up, at least in his eyes. Considering the way he stumbled, pelvis first, into his fortune it does not surprise the other occupant of the office.

He turned the lights down, just for him. He did not, on the other hand, fire up the lights of the Tree of Sephiroth. No need to remind this man of how low on the totem pole he is in comparison. He has _all day_ for that, after all.

Fingers tented into a bridge in front of his mouth, the sun behind him obscuring him into a blinding silhouette, he regards the man in front of him through amber glasses.

"Subdirector Sohryu," he says, "How was your trip?"

"Long and boring," Sohryu responds, arms folded, "Ikari, I've heard some disturbing rumors about the handling of the 19th Angel. Care to explain?"

"Elaborate."

"That the Angel is still alive," Sohryu responds, a growl twisting his lips, "Ikari, what did you do with the Angel?"

"Which one?"

Sohryu stares at him, narrowing his eyes and resting his hands on the cane.

"Which…one? Ikari?"

"I have at least four Angels on the premises," Ikari responds, a small grin appearing on his lips, "Major Ayanami counts as at least two, as she is in possession of both Adam and Lilith. The Fourth Child most likely possesses some remnant of Bardiel, the Evangelions are, with two exceptions, carrying the memory patterns of the 17th, and there is, of course, this base."

"Don't toy with me, Ikari," Sohryu growls, "The Angel that just attacked. I _demand_ to be updated on its status, immediately, and why NERV has not done its chosen duty and _killed_ it."

Beneath the tented hands, Gendo Ikari grins. This will be _too easy._

"Come with me," he says, "And I will show you."

*

*

* * *

The walk from the Commander's office to the main Cage tank, the central holding tank of recycled and synthetic LCL, is done in silence. Not through choice, but because eventually Sohryu realized Ikari was ignoring him, as he normally does. Waiting for them, as arranged by the Commander, is Mrs. Sohryu, along with Doctor Sohryu and Inspector Ikari, with Ariel explaining to her grandmother a rehearsed but still excitable tale of everything she's done in the five weeks since she's arrived.

"Well?" Sohryu demands, "Where's the Angel?"

"The S2 organ was successfully removed," Ikari explains, "All traces of Angelic genetic material are now in a dormant state, similar to the original intention of the Dummy Plug project. Hence, the Angel was considered neutralized without harming the girl."

Asuka gives off a pleasant smile, hands on Ariel's shoulders as the girl beams back.

"Well, why isn't she dead, then?" Sohryu demands.

The smile drops off. Ariel raises a questioning eyebrow as Asuka's face turns bright red. Silence falls over them all as Asuka's face twists with muted horror at the suggestion.

"W…what did you _just say?_" she demands.

"Quiet, girl," Sohryu barks, waving her off as he spins on Ikari, "I don't know what game you're playing here, Ikari, and I don't care. NERV's mission is the elimination of Angels. That girl is an Angel, and I want to know why you've neglected NERV's primary duty!"

"You believe so?" Ikari asks, amusement barely noticeable in his voice.

Asuka pulls Ariel closer to her, narrowing her eyes.

"We acknowledge that you play your little games," Sohryu says, glaring at Ikari, standing half a head taller than him, "And since the Committee disappeared, you _are _the one in charge. But don't think this lapse in judgment will be excused just because your son is bedding the girl's mother!"

Ikari raises an eyebrow, hands clasped behind him. Ticking off numbers in his head, the right corner of his mouth barely ticks upward. Three. Two. One.

"How _dare _you!"

They turn as Asuka hands Ariel to Claire, marching towards her father. Hands balled into angry fists and face flushed an angry red, she gives him a glare that could melt steel as she gets directly into his face.

"That is _your_ grand daughter," she says, pointing to Ariel, "My _daughter!_ How _dare_ you speak of her like that!"

"That is no more your daughter than that pale abomination is Ikari's," Sohryu responds as Shinji's mouth thins into a line, "Even if we didn't have all the information Ikari did, we were running odds she was some sort of monster!"

He shrugs, disappointment and resignation evident on his face.

"I thought motherhood would calm you down, Asuka," he says, "But I was wrong. You're as unstable as your mother."

Nostrils flare and Shinji walks between them, hand on Asuka's shoulder to push her back.

"Subdirector, sir, with all due respect-"

"Don't talk to me of respect," Sohryu barks, "And keep out of this! I have to deal with enough children without having to deal with two rutting hormone piles!"

"I was just saying that-"

"Don't you _dare_ talk about my mother," Asuka seethes, "You-"

Something vile and German, Claire covering the girl's ears as Sohryu's eyes go wide and Gendo raises an eyebrow. He responds in kind, the father daughter discussion turning into a profanity filled shouting match, screaming in each other's face, spittle flying as Shinji tries to pull them both apart and gets punched in the jaw by Sohryu for his trouble.

Followed by Asuka pushing her father back. He chokes, sputters, adjusts his lapels as Ikari walks over and grabs him by the shoulder.

"Enough," he says.

"About damn time, Ikari," Sohryu spats.

"The Special Inspector forgets himself," Ikari says, "His authority is vast, but he is not able to directly discipline Director-level officials."

He leads him from Asuka, who stomps over to Shinji, pulling him to his feet.

"Well, Ikari," Sohryu says, "What are you going to do about this mess?"

"This."

And with that, Gendo Ikari pushes Sohryu over the railing. The overweight German bureaucrat screams as he falls into the amber liquid, sputtering and swearing as he looks up to find Ikari leaning on the railing, the others already joining him.

"Subdirector Sohryu," Ikari says, "I now have you on record as having threatened the well-being of the child of a NERV employee and striking my subordinate with no provocation. You are relieved of your position, effective immediately."

Something rumbles underneath the water, Sohryu looking down.

"I believe your wife would also like to take the opportunity to talk with you."

Underneath Sohryu, four lights burst into light. A quick outtake of breath causes the LCL to roll, and Sohryu at that moment realizes exactly what is waiting for him.

"Oh dear God," he whispers, "…Kyoko?"

The hand breaks the surface, the red hand grabbing Sohryu and closing, before dragging him down.

*

*

* * *

"Well, he deserved that," Claire says, patting Asuka on the shoulder, "Should we save him?"

"Unit 02 won't kill him," Gendo says, "In theory. The LCL is oxygenated, so he will not drown. Someone will fish him out."

In the depths, they see the bubbles from the roars and screams. Ikari pushes his glasses back up his nose.

"In an hour or two."

They continue staring at the scene. Shinji wraps an arm around Asuka's shoulder, holding her close as Asuka takes Ariel's hand. Asuka sighs, watching. And Mrs. Sohryu stares at the lake before favoring Ikari with an appraising glance.

"Well then," Gendo says, "Shall we have lunch?"

*

*

* * *

"Really wish you would tell me these things more than two minutes earlier," Shinji says, walking with his father back into his office.

"The plan called upon plausible deniability," Ikari says, "And no, my plan did not involve Sohryu directly aggravating the Doctor. If you had known what was planned, you would have not let her approach him in the first place. Subdirector Sohryu is a…what is the term?"

"Dick?"

"Raging a__hole," Ikari responds, "And militant. He did not take well the idea that the 19th Angel was not dead, even more so when he understood it to be Doctor Sohryu's child."

"Bet he loves Rei."

"He will be shipped back to Germany this afternoon," Ikari says, sitting at his desk, "His wife will remain in Tokyo-3 for the meantime. She is more…open to the results of the Angel sortie. And Doctor Sohryu?"

"Never liked him," Shinji says, sitting in the chair in front of the desk, "I had to calm her down. And…I'll admit, I wanted to strangle him but…this was all a plan, wasn't it? Not just to get rid of him, but also to keep him from doing anything to Ariel?"

The elder Ikari looks up at him, the small beginnings of a smile on the corner of his lips. Twelve years ago, he was unreadable. Time gives Shinji the advantage.

"NERV will not stain its hands with the blood of a child if it can help it," Ikari responds, tapping up reports, "With Sohryu silenced, the rest of the opposition to the outcome will follow suit. I _am_ Supreme Commander, but even I cannot command an empty room."

Shinji smiles, sitting back. Hands tented in front of his face and thinking, with a smile on his face. Pausing in his perusal of financial statements, the Commander turns to him.

"Yes?"

"Just thinking," he says, "You've done all this. You set this all up to save Ariel. Right now, she's happy here, and she sees me as her father. Her grandfather, who had the authority to harm her, is out of that job. And now, she's even safer than she was before. I have to say, this is kind of unexpected, but not in a bad way."

Pushing his glasses up his nose, Ikari grunts.

"Your point?"

"I'll make sure Ariel sends you a father's day card," Shinji says with a smirk, "Grandpa."

"Dismissed."

*

*

* * *

"Okay, class. Who can tell me the difference between the Kaiju and the Angels? Chidori?"

"Kaiju are physical, while Angels have abilities which defy physical description."

Shinji nods to the brown haired girl, who beams her smile for the world to see as Shinji calls up the projector to display an image of a massive, black and white sphere.

"Evangelion technology is nicknamed Divine Technology," he says, "And not just for the whole 'Adam and Lilith' parts of it, but it is on a level metaphysical. Doctor Sohryu can explain this better than I can, but basically Evangelions, and the Angels they are based on, can mess with the laws of physics something fierce. Meet Leilel. Or particularly, the shadow of Leilel."

Several hands go up this time around. It seems they study _this_ one, to.

"Technical term?"

"Dirac Sea!"

"Right," Shinji says, "I charged blindly into it and got sucked into a pocket dimension for my trouble. And before anyone asks, no, I do _not_ remember exactly what I saw and most commonly have it attributed to broken oxygen scrubbers in the Entry Plug. The mind does funny things when you're suffocating."

Shifting a little, he clicks the display, silent as it shows Unit 01 sinking into the shadow consuming a good chunk of the old Tokyo-3.

"During the Angel War, our lack of effective weaponry meant entire chunks of Tokyo-3 would be wiped out during a battle," he says, "The 16th Angel saw the effective complete destruction of the first Tokyo-3, which wouldn't be rebuilt until after the Third Impact."

Another image. This time, an image of what was, at some point, the American Southwest. Only now, there is a hold eighty miles wide.

"Unit 04 was a prototype Evangelion," he says, "Set to test an artificially created S2 Engine, based on recovered data from the Fourth Angel. When the Unit activated, though, it created a similar phenomenon, and sucked the entire branch, along with everything around it, into a Dirac Sea. We never knew if this was also caused by Leilel, but the Angels tended to come only to Tokyo-3. This one's another mystery for the ages."

*

*

* * *

Fuming, Asuka paces the length and breadth of the hotel room, hands clenching and unclenching. On the NERV expense account they managed to secure a nice suite, with red carpet and plush sofas and two bedrooms, with a full kitchen and a Jacuzzi, and after today's events one less occupant. It is to her credit that Ariel is not in the least bit disturbed or put off by Asuka's mood, having explained to Marie that, 'Mama has to unwind' when dealing with 'stupid people.'

"I think we can all accept that your father's a ba…a not very nice person," Claire says, sitting with her hands folded in her lap as Marie has Ariel in hers, "But I really think we must talk about the more pressing matter at hand, Asuka."

She stops, spinning on her. A biting question dies on her lips with an unwomanly grunt as she places her hands on her hips.

"Yes?"

"You," Claire says, "And the Commander's boy. Exactly why should we not be worried?"

Ariel raises an eyebrow at the statement and Marie smiles. The girl has learned well, she thinks.

"Elaborate," Asuka says with a smirk.

"Everything that's happened in the past thirty years has been because of that boy's parents," she responds, "They're monsters. Both of them. Why is he any different?"

Folding her hands in front of her, Asuka sighs. An explanation, easy enough, to convince her. In the years passing, their relationship became…more natural. Less angry. She no longer blamed this woman for stealing her father because she realized what sort of man her father was in the first place. And still-

"I think you don't know Mr. Shinji," Ariel chimes in.

The grandmother turns to her, raising a thin eyebrow.

"What was that, dear?"

"Mr. Shinji's nice," Ariel says, swaying gently on Marie's lap, "He really is! He cooks for us all the time an' helped me when-"

"When Ariel had her…episode," Asuka interrupts, "Shinji risked his life to save her. He's the reason she's still alive today, and I mean the _sole_ reason she's alive today. I honestly don't care what your opinion is of the Commander or Shinji's mother, but I swear, if I knew twelve years ago what I know today about him, Ariel would have a _lot_ of brothers and sisters."

Asuka sighs, shrugging.

"Look," she says, "If you want to be convinced, fine. My door's always open, and he's there most of the time helping me. Right now, I don't have time. Because while you stood there when my own father threatened my daughter, he tried to break his arm. And I'm going to thank him for it. Ari?"

Ariel hops off Marie, the sister laughing as she walks hand in hand with her mother out the door. Wiping a happy tear from her eye, Marie gives off a small, delighted chuckle.

"And you're pleased with this, to?" Claire asks.

"Unlike you, I was here when Ari arrived," Marie answers with a smile, "And I was worried sick for five weeks. Now I see my sister happier than she's ever been. He could be the Devil himself for all we know. As long as he makes them happy, she can dance with the Devil to her heart's content."

*

*

* * *

Gasping for air, spitting out the disgusting amber liquid, Harrison Sohryu gasps curses and thanks at the same time to the figure that has just yanked him from the jaws of certain death. Jaws which belong to his 200' tall ex wife.

Some distance behind him, Unit 02 only acknowledges the rescue with a grunt, retreating into the depths and back into its Cage.

"Mr. Sohryu."

He looks up into the eyes of his savior.

The red eyes of his savior.

"You…you're-"

"I am Auntie Rei," Rei Ayanami says, "And we must discuss your actions towards my niece."

*

*

* * *

Clicking the phone closed, Asuka sighs, rolls her eyes, and drops it on the counter, prompting Shinji to turn from the stove over to her.

"My father," she says, "Apologizes profusely for his actions towards me and my daughter, and expresses his deepest, most profound apologies towards you, and invites us all to dinner tomorrow night."

He purses his lips, raising an eyebrow in confusion.

"What prompted that?"

"Two hours alone with 'Auntie Rei.'"

She laughs, envisioning what their former co-pilot and weirdness magnet had done in those two hours to so thoroughly break the old man's will. Shinji, on the other hand, lets out a low, amused chuckle. Plans within plans, and occasionally he can makes plans as well. He used to have control over his own life. Back when he was about three.

But he runs with it, now.

"Remember when you two were antagonistic?"

"She's still a freak," Asuka says with a shrug, "But she's a useful freak to have around."

*

*

* * *

For a moment, for a long series of moments, Shinji was afraid he would have to explain to Ariel that, no, she was not a monster. That no, no matter what her grandfather said, she was still the same Ariel that she always was. No creature's psyche is as resilient and elastic as a five year old girl's, though, and as the girl skips out of the bathroom as sees Shinji sitting on the couch and deep in thought, she takes it onto herself to sit next to him.

"Oh," he says, and smile, "Hey. So, you're going to spend tomorrow night with Aunt Hikari. Is that alright?"

"Why?"

"Well, your mother and I are having dinner with your grandparents and Aunt Marie," he responds, ruffling her hair, "We're going to be late, and it's a grown up restaurant."

"Okay," she responds, "Are you going to hit my grandpa?"

He pauses. Shaking his head, he pulls her closer, arm around her shoulder.

"Ari, why would I do that?" he asks.

"'Cause you looked like you wanted to hit him," she responds, "An' he hit you, to."

"That's because he was saying some very mean things about you," he responds, "And your mother. And you know how much I like you two, right?"

She nods, smiling. Beaming.

"Well, your Auntie Rei also was very upset about what he said," he continues, "So he spent some time talking to your grandpa and making sure he was very, _very_ sorry about how he treated you two. So, he's taking us all out to dinner to make up for it."

Time spent talking with him that probably involved a taser, Shinji thinks. Rei has been persuasive in her own way, and no more so than in matters involving family.

And somehow, even with Asuka, she's made herself family. Sighing, he pulls Ariel closer, not noticing Asuka as she stands in the doorway of her bedroom, watching.

"Ariel," he says, "What your grandfather said was not true. You're not a monster. No more than your Auntie Rei is. No more than me or your mother is. Do you understand that?"

She nods, quickly. Some worry in her eye that is quickly squashed by her willingness to believe and her belief in _him._ Her Daddy.

She quickly hugs him, pecking him on the cheek before she hurries off to her bedroom. Sighing, Shinji slumps back onto the couch, only looking up as Asuka sits next to him, wrapping her arms around him.

"If he touched you I would have strangled him," he says.

"I know," she says, "You're not a wimp. You never were. You were just _so_ much better at controlling yourself than I ever was."

She leans against him, comfortable. That is their best position, their best time together, simply sitting there, silent in contemplation of each other. Comfortable with each other. There are moments of fire and passion, yes. But it always leads back to this, as his hand goes to the small of her back and she lays her head on his shoulder.

"How is it your father ended up being the nicest of all our parents?"

"He set this entire thing up to keep your father from harming Ariel," he responds, "I think he makes complex plans within plans to order coffee."

"If you start quoting, we're not going to have sex anymore."

She doesn't wait for a response, tightening her grip on him. Patting her hand, he idly checks the clock, burying his nose in her hair as the seconds tick by.

"We should turn in," she says, "Rei already called dibs on you tomorrow to help her plan. I have to run tests on Unit 10."

"Yeah," he responds, "I should prepare for my next lecture, to. God, I think I'm enjoying it. Talking about piloting with them. They have it better than I ever did…than we ever did."

"Yeah."

She disengages from him, pressing her lips to his, tightening her night robe around herself to ward off some chill.

"Dinner's at five," she says, "I'll see you then."

With that, she shuffles into the bedroom, closing the door behind her. Waiting long moments, he resigns himself to the night, walking out and into his own sparsely used apartment.

*

*

* * *

Wandering, down the pathways of inevitable possibility, she finds her beacon and rides towards it. The thoughts echo, much like her own, and she smiles that _smile_ of hers that she could finally find this light in the darkness, this point she has been looking for ever since awareness returned in the blessed moment of freedom.

Of course she is happy. The day's events were a release to her, allowing her to finally set one issue to rest. And now comes ghost of the past number 2, as she walks into the light, finding a lovely little home with children running around, the housewife not a housewife at all, but busy and glorious as she commands all around her.

"I'm relieved, _liebchen,_" she says, catching the dreamer's attention, "And somewhat disappointed. I was somewhat flattered that you dreamt about finding me for all those years."

The dream falls away, leaving only the darkness. Standing across from her, in her pajamas and glasses, Asuka does not smile. Years ago, she would have been overjoyed to speak with her. Now, she knows better.

"Hello, mother."

"No 'Mama'?" Kyoko Zeppelin Sohryu asks, "Well, I am shocked. No longer Mama's little girl?"

Her lips thin into a line, regarding her daughter. Folding her arms, she waits for an answer as Asuka turns and begins walking away. Walking around her and studying her.

"I expected this could happen," she says, "Especially since you're aware. The ability to Synch means that there should be the possibility of two way transmission. I'm guessing that's half the reason we did those synch tests, to see if something could be carried over or a dialogue could be reached. Maybe it was the Commander's attempt to somehow reach his wife."

"My little Asuka," Kyoko says with a small smile, "A warrior and scientist. So easily grasping all the little nuances of my work."

"Don't flatter me."

Staring at her, Asuka regards the woman. Like her, without the scars, without the trauma. Proud, unbent, unmoving. Almost inhuman in her pride.

"What do you want?" she asks.

"To talk," Kyoko says, "You will not talk to me, so I will talk to you. And you will **listen.**"

In her bed, Asuka opens her eyes with a start. Words, visions, images are fuzzy. The memory bleeds away as quickly as it arrived, and rolling on her side she reaches her arm around and finds no one there, sighing to herself as she realizes how _familiar_ the other body is for her, how her bed feels empty when she is alone in it.

Wrapping her arms around herself, she closes her eyes, drifting back to sleep.

It is dreamless, this night.

*

*

* * *

"I apologize for my deception. While I will need your help to plan the logistics of my wedding, I have also called you here to help with another matter."

The lift doors close, the clear walls showing no movement as Shinji looks over to his sister. Hands clasped, eyebrow raised, he waits for her to continue as she takes a white, gold trimmed keycard out of her pocket and swipes it. Walls blur as the lift begins its descent downward, passing the bottom wall of Ramiel and continuing into the ground.

"I ask that you not hold judgment," Rei says, not meeting Shinji's gaze, "This has been a project worked on by the Commander and I for several years. He wishes to speak with you."

"Father?"

"No," Rei says, tightening her clasped hands, "Not the Commander."

Continuing for a minute longer, the lift stops, opening to a lit, polished, black hallway. It leads into the distance, into the darkness, and Rei takes his wrist and leads him along.

"Has Doctor Akagi gotten back to you with those results?"

"Yes," she responds, "She will have a new drug treatment which may help with my…problems on the matter."

"Good," he says with a small smile, "I hope you two…weird. I feel like I've been here before."

She says nothing in reply, simply continuing to walk.

"Rei? Where are we going?"

"The Commander has a plan."

"Of course he does. He always has a plan."

"A plan with a clear and distinct outcome," Rei continues, "I am one of the two main confidants of the processes of the plan. The other is Doctor Akagi. I believe, however, that she has more knowledge of the overall goal than I do."

A door opens, followed by another.

"What is this place," he asks.

"At one point, it was part of Terminal Dogma that remained on Earth following the Geofront's ascension," Rei explains, "It was here we found it."

They stop, in front of a massive gate resembling a series of gears. Impassively, she stands, as beams of light read over the two of them, displaying floating holographic screens of their faces, 3-D images of their bodies and reading off their names.

"This is the new Heaven's Door," she says, "We simply call it the Gate."

"Heaven or Hell?" he asks.

"A matter of perspective."

The gears turn, the door rolling out of the way with a hum. The only sound now is breathing. Heavy, animalistic breathing as she takes his hand and leads him in. The darkness recedes as the lights click on, in a circle around it as Shinji's eyes adjust. Nodding to an invisible sound, she steps aside, leading him to the center of the raised platform as he peers into the abyss.

And the Abyss peers back, taking the form of the great metal grimace.

"_I welcome you, Third Child._"

Shinji screams, falling back, eyes wide as Rei catches him.

"He will not harm you," she says.

"That…that's the Angel! That's the _Fourteenth Angel! WHAT THE HELL IS IT DOING HERE?!"_

"He is pacified," Rei says, grabbing his forearm and holding him in place, "He is no longer hostile. He is powerless."

"_Mother/Father speaks true,_" the bulk of Zeruel says, shifting its mass to show what appears to be a Power Cable similar to those of the Evangelions, "_Your weapon consumed the Fruit of Life within my form. As restored as I am, I am unable to act save for the permission of the Lilim."_

"Again," Shinji says, staring wide eyed as the form manifest out of his nightmares, "Rei…what is it _doing_ here?"

Rei turns to the Angel, which regards her, inclining its massive head.

"Following Third Impact," she says, "A portion of it that had been passed through Unit 01 began to regenerate. It called to me, and using a portion of Adam, I completed it without causing another Impact. It is no longer hostile, as its purpose of aggression has been satiated. It now advises."

The Angel turns back to Shinji, eyes glowing with every word that enters his mind.

"_I have wanted for some time to see the face of my conqueror,_" it whispers, "_To see the one who felled me when none could. I am the Angel of __**Might.**__ Greatest of the Messengers…save one. Do you know which that is, Third Child?_"

Standing a little straighter, trying not to soil himself in front of the being he is undoubtedly totally terrified of, Shinji stares into its eyes.

"Tabris?"

Zeruel chuckles. It is not a pleasant sound.

"_And why is that? Because he came last?"_

The Angel straightens itself, its cord like arms hanging in the breeze like curtains.

"_Do you truly think that the tantrum of a weapon could destroy a universe in miniature? Or do you think it could simply force a way out?"_

Blood, streaming and staining a city. Unit 01 roaring as it forces its way from the sphere, shredding it as it alights and crashes to the ground before deactivating in exhaustion. A faulty scrubber making him witness his life…or maybe not a faulty tool. Maybe something that was _already there._

"We missed one, didn't we?"

"Yes," Rei says, "The Twelfth Angel."

"_Whom you know as Leilel. The Sea of Dirac, the Void between Worlds. You have no idea what the Angels are, Third Child. None of you do. We are not merely monsters to be put down for a prize._"

"Okay…"

A small smirk appears on his face, bravado in the face of an Angry God.

"What are you, then?"

Zeruel's eyes flash. And all is revealed.

*

*

* * *

Fingers tap on the table in unsteady rhythm. The two sit in a coffee bar some distance from the base, and from the…guest. Rubbing the bridge of his nose, he grunts, gritting his teeth as his face twists in pain.

"You are unwell," Rei says.

"No shit," Shinji grunts, "It's…it's a lot to take in. _Hn."_

He slumps back in his seat, his coffee cup full and cold. Images keep flashing in his eyes, in the corner of his vision. Words with letters he has never seen in human language, forms that are not human nor even pretend to be human. Red eyes in configurations that simply _do not work_

**IN THE BEGINNING, THERE WAS THE SEA OF LIFE UPON WHICH THE TREE SPRANG**

And Shinji grabs his head, biting back a cry. Rei pulls back her right sleeve, extending her hand palm first towards Shinji's head. Looking about to make sure none are looking directly at her, her eye glows. The flesh of her palm splits, revealing a quickly focusing eye as a small stream of gold weaves out and touches his ear, traveling down the canal.

Blinking back hot tears, Shinji slumps back into his chair. His face is covered under a sheen of sweat, his eyes blinking as he regains focus. Sucking her teeth, Adam retreats back into Rei as she pulls her sleeve back up.

"I have stabilized the imagery," she says, "Adam and Lilith allowed me to stabilize the psychic invasion when Zeruel did the same to me. And when he did the same to the Commander."

"Explain to me, then."

"The Angels are…gods."

He raises an eyebrow, staring at her.

"There is no more appropriate term for them," she says, "They are ancient and powerful beings that are both native and beyond time and space. They take many forms. They can manifest before us only under certain conditions. There are eighteen of them. They represent eighteen concepts which order everything."

"Eighteen?"

"Humanity, sentient individual life, the eighteenth. We represent individuality and life. The Commander wishes to create a new Angel. Zeruel knows how."

He stares at her. His mouth twists from an expression of shock to horror and disbelief as she calmly sips her tea. Memories of his childhood comes back to the surface and he suppresses the scream as he narrows his eyes.

"That's _insane._"

"You are comparing it to Instrumentality."

"There's something else to compare it to," Shinji asks, "Rei, how in God's name are you going along with this?"

She looks him in the eye, and smiles. A slight, knowing smile, relief evident in her eyes. She looks happy as she smiles, beautiful.

"When the Angel spoke with you, the Commander asked me to tell you everything," she says, "He will not keep secrets from you on this matter. His intentions on the creation of the new Angel are to bring about a redemption."

"For himself?" he asks.

"I do not know," she responds, sipping her tea, "He only said that he wishes to bring about redemption. And an ending."

She places the tea down, taking the menu on the table and opening it, looking down the list. She clears her throat, getting his attention as he turns to her, face still weary and drawn.

"Now," she says, "Unfortunately, you will not be the best man. That honor goes to Suzuhara. What we want you to do, on the other hand…"


	14. The Gospel of Gendo Ikari

For some reason, no one's touched the bread basket.

Somewhere midway through dinner, Asuka got up and dragged her father outside, verbally if not physically, leaving Shinji alone with her stepsister and stepmother. Claire Olivierte-Sohryu only stares at him, appraising him. Considering the days events, and what he just had to stare down a few hours ago, he finds himself not especially worried. The life of a former Evangelion pilot prepares one for eventualities, and staring into the jaws of the Abyss is one of them.

"So," Marie says, clapping her hands together, "I understand your sister is getting married?"

He nods. Choosing his words carefully, he reaches for his water glass, sipping as he lets his eye wander back to the table and the other patrons in the rather expensive and high class European-style establishment. The tablecloth is velvet and silk, red and with a large candelabra at the center, an untouched bread basket in front of them.

"Yeah," Shinji responds, "Rei's getting married. The wedding's next week."

"Your…sister?" Claire asks, "I thought you were an only child."

"Sort of," Shinji says, shrugging, "Rei's actually a genetically modified clone of my mother that my father created to bring about Third Impact. So she's my half sister."

He turns back to Marie, grinning.

"How's the kids?"

-

-

**Chapter 14: The Gospel of Gendo Ikari**

-

-

Two people stand at the balcony overlooking the twinkling lights of Tokyo-3. Father and daughter, even if neither really referred to the other as such, staring off into the lights and no each other. The gulf between them runs deeper than the drop towards the street below, and wider still than the expanse of the city itself.

"I don't say this often," Harrison Sohryu says, "But…I'm sorry."

"Elaborate. Please."

Twisting his hands on the railing, the old man grimaces as Asuka leans against it. Of course, she twists the knife. That is her great talent.

"You really are just like your mother," he breathes.

"_This_ is your apology?" she asks, not turning to him.

"I'm not _finished,_" he growls, teeth gritted as he clenches his hands into fists around the metal, "Just as passionate. Just as brilliant. And just as stubborn. Understand that I have…had…a role which involved ensuring that the Angels _died._ It is not pleasant and it is not _nice,_ but I am not here to _coddle._ When I learned that not only did an Angel manifest twelve years after they were supposed to be all gone but that NERV did not destroy it _as they are tasked to do,_ it becomes disturbing."

"Even if the Angel's your grand daughter?"

"Even if the Angel is my _grand daughter._ I cannot in whole conscience barter the future of humanity on my own flesh and blood."

She sighs, shrugging.

"Just my opinion," she says, "But when _Gendo Ikari_ takes a gentler hand to child rearing than you do, it's time to get some perspective."

He rolls his eyes, an action mirrored by her as he turns to her. He stands a head taller than her, baring teeth the same way she does, arms folded as his face hardens. They stare, for moments, minutes, as they both mutter something unfriendly in German before he turns back to the railing.

"Did you ever love my mother?" she asks.

"With all my heart," he sighs, "For a time. She was difficult and passionate and wild and…neither of us were fit to be parents. Understand that. When your mother went insane, I sought the first measure of comfort and stability I could, when I should have been there for you."

She nods, arms folded. Looking down, not directly at him, trying to avoid his eyes.

"I tried," he says, "I took you in when she died. I tried to make sure you wanted for nothing. But you are as…prideful as she ever was…as she is. Her eccentricities and…inanities made for a combination."

A sigh, a breath. Another reinforcement of a conclusion reached long ago.

"My mother was insane long before the accident," she says.

"She was. It just became dangerous after the experiment. I will not pretend to know exactly what happened. I don't understand this technology and science you involve yourself in."

"Except I follow in her footsteps," she says, voice soft, low, painful coming from her throat, "And run the same risks."

"Except you succeed where she fails," he says, a sad smile crossing his face, "I am sorry for how I acted towards your daughter. It was my obligation and, believe it or not, I take no pleasure in the idea of killing a child. And as much as a rail and bluster, all I can do is protest, while Ikari _is_ NERV."

Twisting his lips as relaxing his shoulders, he places a hand on Asuka's shawl covered shoulder, and to his pleasure and relief finds she does not flinch.

"The matter has been dropped. We all have our jobs to do."

She nods, looking him in the eye.

"I won't accept your apology," she says, "That would cheapen what you did."

He nods.

"Understand," she continues, "That a man who abandoned his _own son_ did more to protect my child than you did. I cannot _articulate_ how angry I am with you, and its common decency that's keeping me from throwing you off this balcony."

Again, he nods, saying nothing.

"I will move past this," she says, "And I will not cut you out. But I will _not_ forgive this."

With that, she pulls away from him, and walks back in. Leaning against the railing, looking at the stars, he waits for a while, himself.

*

*

* * *

The door slams. Something slams into the door right after, fumbling with the light switch before turning it on as the two kiss, passionately, messily, her hands pulling off his jacket as he fumbles with her shawl, dipping her down, nuzzling her neck as she gasps. Kicking off shoes, they stumble into the kitchen, Asuka slamming his back into the wall as she practically hangs off of him, moaning through the kisses as he finally grabs her shoulders and holds her at arms length.

"What?" she pants.

"Are you," he says, "Are you alright?"

"I just had to have dinner with my parents," she says, unwinding the tie and tossing it across the kitchen, quickly undoing the button on his collar, "I'm far from _alright. _I had to deal with that god damn harlot and my father tried to _apologize_ for wanting to kill my little girl_._"

"Um…you had a little bit to drink…"

She mashes her lips against his, pinning his wrists to the kitchen wall. He tastes the wine on her breath, feels her tongue exploring his mouth. He returns in kind, even with wrists pinned, forcing her back, their eyes closed and mouths working. Snapping her mouth shut, she pulls away, before with renewed strength pinning him to the wall.

"Yeah," she says, "But only a little. 'Cause I wouldn't do what I'm going to do tonight if I was _sober._"

She yanks open his shirt, buttons bouncing off the tile floor. She kisses him on the jaw, down the neck, moving downward as he fidgets his fingers in his held fast hands, trying to articulate an argument.

"Well," he says, "I'm just saying that if you're emotionally distressed, maybe we should talk or discuss the situation or…"

He raises an eyebrow as she begins unzipping him with her teeth, and shrugs, wisely capitulating.

"…or not."

*

*

* * *

There are normal business hours. There are extended hours, and night hours.

Then there are the hours that Commander Ikari keeps, as the sun has already well set and he sits in his office, sipping coffee as he peruses financial reports and scientific statements. While certainly less outright evil than he was during NERV's glory years of the first Angelic War, most employees would still be hard pressed to admit that he is, in fact, human. He normally keeps thirty six hour days, returning to his home for eight hours of sleep before once more absconding to his office. He guzzles coffee like Subcommander Katsuragi once guzzled beer. It is rumored that he once stopped a rampage of Unit 00 by glaring at it until it deactivated.

The current office pool points towards him being a vampire, the Devil, some sort of Angel, or a flock of ducks in a Gendo Ikari suit. It is impossible to phase him, it is said, and it was he who taught Major Ayanami to be completely unflappable.

In recent years, especially following the end of the Angel War, NERV employees began publishing on the internet Random Facts about Gendo Ikari. It is said that the AT Field is not for keeping the soul in. It is for keeping Commander Ikari _out._

"Good evening, Commander."

The door to his office closes. He looks up to find Claire Olivierte-Sohryu sauntering into the room, eyeing him, appraising him. He pushes his glasses up his nose, raising an eyebrow as she takes a seat across from him, sliding into it, legs crossed and eyes alight.

"Mrs. Sohryu," he says, "What can I do for you?"

"A loaded question, Commander," she says, "One I should also ask you. I believe in regards to my husband's dismissal, we may be able to come to a mutually…beneficial agreement."

_Random Fact about Gendo Ikari 117: The Commander has never seduced a woman, as 'seduction' implies he had to work for it._

"Agreement?" he asks, "Your husband was dismissed for negligence and incompetence. Elaborate on how this merits my attention."

"You forget for also threatening a girl you have designs on," she responds, "Or do you think I didn't notice the attention you give the girl? I must admit, I am surprised by the prospect that the great and fearsome Gendo Ikari apparently has a soft spot for the five year old girl of my insane and broken step daughter."

_Random fact about Gendo Ikari 428: The Commander's paternal instincts have two settings- 'Open fire' and 'Activate the Dummy Plug'._

"I find it embarrassing," Ikari starts, pushing his glasses up his nose, "When I am considered the more stable parent. Understand this. Doctor Sohryu believes, and rightly so due to the fact that I used to command her, that I am a monster. While I do not rule by fear as I did in the…old days…I do not brook disobedience and insubordination. I do, however, realize that a rule through terror is not a stable rule."

She shifts uneasily in her seat as he tents his hands in front of his face. She cannot see the satisfied smirk behind the hands, only the reflection of the light in his glasses.

"And you are here," he continues, "To…what? Attempt to seduce me? I congratulate you, Mrs. Sohryu. It takes much effort to disgust _me._"

"Now wait just a minute-"

"I. Am not. Done."

She quiets down, breath catching in her throat as he too goes silent, staring at her.

_Random fact about Gendo Ikari 094: You are what you eat. That is why the Commander's diet includes parts of the 14__th__ Angel, bullets, and the tears of small children._

"I will make something clear enough for you to understand," Ikari says, "Doctor Sohryu is the head of Project E. Her work is valuable to NERV, more so than the administrative duties your husband was competent enough to execute. Any action taken against her will be seen as an action against myself and NERV. And they will be responded to accordingly."

He pushes his glasses up his nose.

"Are we clear?"

"Yes," she squeaks.

"Now get out."

She scrambles out of her seat, quickly walking out. The floating screen next to the Commander shows her breaking into a run the moment she crosses into the hallway. Grinning, he turns back to his reports.

This has been a _good_ day.

*

*

* * *

She is on her stomach, face mashed into the pillow, lightly snoring as he stares at the ceiling. Fingers trace on the small white circles on her back. The exit wounds from twelve years ago, making her moan in her snores. He can't sleep. The day keeps coming back to him, the visions gone but implications remain. Ghosts of the past, possibilities of the future, and the realization that his father may not be done with his mad schemes…

But why would Rei go along?

She is loyal, yes. But she isn't his doll anymore. She wouldn't go along with something insane. She has her own life.

Next to him Asuka stirs, rolling onto her side and draping her arm over his chest. Feeling the chill, he pulls the covers over their naked bodies, pulling her over and wrapping his arms around her. Leaning forward, he presses his lips against her neck, making her giggle as she half opens her eyes, pressing herself against him.

"What's wrong," she whispers, nuzzling against his shoulder.

"Can't sleep," he responds, "Had a weird day."

"Mm hm," she purrs, "Rei's wedding coming out weird?"

He sighs, running his hands down her back.

"Well," he says, "It wasn't exactly that…"

*

*

* * *

Rei Ayanami, Major and Tactical Operations Commander for NERV, does not have an extensive wardrobe. She has the occasional dress gown and robe, but other than that, her clothing consists entirely of NERV uniforms. Given, they have a buttoned undershirt and three colors of skirts so she can vary it a little, but other than that, she has nothing. It was with some level of surprise that her fiancé found out, for example, that she sleeps naked.

She claimed it was for 'efficient time use', and then pinned him to the mattress.

So it is slightly flushed that he sits next to her in front of the interviewer. A short, nondescript man in a black suit, the wall behind him layered with pictures of happy couples.

"So," he says with a smile, "You want to get married. Let's go through some questions first, shall we?"

They both nod. Smiling, Ken reaches over, taking Rei's hand in his own and squeezing it.

"First off," the interviewer says, "How long have you know each other?"

"Twelve years," Rei says.

"I see," the interviewer says with a smile, "School sweethearts, then?"

"Actually, no," Ken says, scratching his head with his free hand, "We were really kind of acquaintances through school. We had a set of mutual friends that sort of ended up hanging out together."

"I see…how long have you two been dating?"

"Four weeks," Rei responds, a small smile appearing on her lips.

"I see…"

The interviewer writes on his notepad, nodding.

"And what prompted that?"

"I have come to the conclusion that I need to have children," Rei responds, "I have chosen Kensuke as the best possibly genetic donor."

"…right."

"To that extent," Rei continues, "I encountered him in a bar near my workplace, tricked him into inviting me to his apartment, and then tied him to his bed and, as a friend explained, 'rode him like a bicycle' for seven hours."

The pencil drops to the desk. Either not noticing or just not caring, she continues regardless.

"Following that, I administered several covert personality tests to him. This included but was not limited to having my security detail role play as a group of undesirables to test his willingness to protect me, as well as strategic placement of bear traps around my apartment to test his awareness."

"I didn't know about the bear traps."

"That is because you proved to be aware of your surroundings."

The notepad drops this time.

"Due to a…problem with my biology," she says, a small tremor in her voice, "I miscarried during our first attempt. Following an accident at my workplace, he proposed to me, and I accepted. We now believe that a more stable relationship may be more important than a large amount of children."

The interviewer taps his fingers on the oak desk, staring at Rei, quickly turning to Kensuke and finding him still smiling despite the story.

"I…see," he says, "Right…how many children are you planning?"

"I am unsure. My biological clock simply indicates that it wants babies. Lots of babies."

He opens and closes his mouth, turning again to Aida and finding no hint this is a joke of any kind. Turning back to her, he clears his throat.

"Right," he says, flipping open a folder with her name on it, "Miss…Ayanami. You say you have a brother listed…I do not see biological parents. Who raised you?"

"Commander Ikari of NERV," she says, "My previous occupation was Evangelion Pilot. My half-brother is Special Inspector Ikari."

The inspector mutters a prayer at Rei's mention of the Commander, turning white.

"I think we broke him," Kensuke says, "Like the other three."

"Mm," she responds, folding her hands in her lap as the interviewer starts babbling, "We may need to go to the previous plan of having Katsuragi officiate."

"You sure she can?"

"Previous to her taking the job with NERV, she spent time in seminary. She was kicked out for drinking the sacramental wine."

"Not that surprised…"

*

*

* * *

In the years following the failed Third Impact, any psychiatrist she was forced to see noted that Asuka Langely Sohryu had developed a clear case of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Following her first real break and calming down, she tended to spend a good amount of time in the bathroom. Previous to the final battle of the Angel War, her morning routines were that of a normal, if vain, teenage girl. Extensive preparation was spent on her hair, of the shaving of unsightly leg hair and plucking of the lips, of the application of makeup and, again, especially her hair, which was quite long and a distinguishing trait.

Following the Third Impact and her subsequent scarring, however, the routine changed. She would often spend up to an hour under scalding water. The Katsuragi household noticed that they would go through bar soap at a distinctly increased rate, as well as mouthwash and toothpaste. The conclusion was that her normal routines had been stepped up to the point of obsessive mania.

Psychologically speaking, she was trying to force herself to be clean. Taking hours upon hours to cleanse herself of what she felt was her own despoiling. This went on for seven years, even after she moved back to Germany. It began to lessen upon the discovery of her biological daughter, Ariel. Still feeling violated, still feeling unclean, she managed to a limited degree suppresses those feelings for the sake of her first tentative steps towards motherhood.

It's only recently that she noticed her routines have become…normal. She checks her watch as she finishes tying her bathrobe around her. Her shower took just under twenty minutes.

Laughing, shakily, she scratches her head. Putting the watch on, she considers the situation. She feels calm. She feels clean. She's been obsessing over her scars and imperfections less and less, and while her dreams are…odd…she has been rested and…

Happy?

Yes, she thinks without hesitation, Happy.

"Not a bad job, Third," she says.

Of course, he's not here. He was already out by the time she woke up, admittedly oversleeping, but as head of Project E she can keep her schedule flexible. Still, she has become used to sharing a bed. An empty bed, an empty apartment almost seems…wrong to her, now. Ariel will be back this afternoon. She mainly had her taken in by Hikari last night because she _knew_ she would be in a bad state after that dinner, even with Marie there.

She _knew_ she would be angry, and upset, and she'd probably have more than a little to drink. And she knew that he would be there, to.

Gott, she thinks, When did I start relying on _him?_

Five weeks ago, the rational voice in the back of her mind responds, all too quickly, or was it twelve years ago, and you just started _admitting it _five weeks ago?

Sighing, she walks into her bedroom, opening her closet and taking out a sensible outfit. White blouse, dark red sweater, long red skirt. She needs to look her best, after all. She needs to be professional. And mobile.

Because she's probably going to rip off the Commander's balls with her own damn hands.

Although she'd have to finish killing him _after_ the rehearsal dinner.

*

*

* * *

"I am curious, though. Why exactly are you doing a western-style wedding?"

"I'm guessing it's a big ol' 'Screw You' to the Angels."

Touji Suzuhara's smile disappears from his face as his wife glares at him, shuffling slightly in his seat. While the kids were at the day care center, the four of them; Touji, Hikari, Rei, and Shinji, decided to go out for a lunch/wedding planning session, with the wedding less than a week away and the rehearsal dinner tonight.

Kensuke, as Rei explained, had some business to take care of today. Save for Hikari, most of them believed that was some sort of euphemism, but they would not voice that belief for very good reasons. Rei would calmly deny it, and Hikari…well, she's far too innocent for something like the term 'Rei Ayanami: Sex Addict' to cross her mind.

And it isn't like Rei is one. She just wants babies. _Babies._

"I have examined several types of weddings," Rei says, sipping her tea as Shinji orders, "The western style wedding seems most…extravagant. Considering what Kensuke and I have gone through, it seems a proper reward for our work."

"One way of looking at it," Hikari says with a smile, taking a roll from the bread basket, "Still…I have to admit, I never expected this. You and Kensuke, I mean. It was just so…out of the blue!"

"Many of our relationships are similar," Rei responds, inclining her head, "Twelve years ago, one would have had trouble seeing you and Pilot Suzuhara are a married couple, much less as parents."

"Or me and Asuka," Shinji says, handing the menus over as the waiter hurries off to the kitchen.

"No, no," Hikari responds, sipping her water, "Pretty much everyone saw it but you two. We're just surprised it took this long."

They go silent. The open air café continues bustling along as Shinji takes out a data pad and goes over reports for his office. Rei, as she normally does in contemplation, regards the simple gold engagement band on her finger, a faint smile crossing her lips.

"I mean, outside of the way you two started dating," Touji continues, "An' you have to admit, it _is_ weird, it's actually sweet. I know Ken's not had any girlfriends."

"And I really can't recall you dating anyone," Hikari adds, turning to Rei, "So really, your first relationships leading directly into marriage. It's quite romantic."

Rei turns to Shinji regarding him slightly. Perking his eyebrows, he glances at her and sighs. Shrugging, she turns back to their married friends, sipping her tea.

"That is not entirely accurate," she says, "Kensuke is not the first person I have attempted to have children by."

Shinji shrinks slightly into the seat.

"Oh?" Touji asks.

"Every year on his birthday since he turned nineteen," Rei says, "I have attempted to seduce Inspector Ikari."

Shinji palms his face, groaning. Touji thoughtfully chews the inside of his cheek, sipping his coffee before looking at it and downing the cup in one gulp.

"Yeah," he drawls, "Aren't you…you know…brother and sister?"

"Enough genetic modification went into my creation that, biologically speaking, I am closer to being a second cousin," she responds, "And do remember, Inspector Ikari has not reciprocated these attempts."

"She started doing that when Asuka first left," Shinji says, patting Rei's hand, "The first time she did it; it really did freak me out. Eventually, it became a running gag."

"It is also serves as a basis to our relationship," Rei adds, "And friendship. And also a reason Inspector Ikari does not drink. When he turned twenty one, I got him drunk and attempted to copulate with him."

She sips her tea.

"I had managed to get his pants off when Subcommander Katsuragi found us. She holds the pictures over both of us as blackmail material, and has not to my knowledge told the Commander of the incident."

A piece of silverware falls onto the table. The three turn to find Hikari staring at Shinji and Rei in dumb shock. Her eyes are open and unblinking, and her mouth his hanging open. Her water glass is still in her hand. Touji waves his hand in front of her face and sighs.

"I think you broke my wife."

*

*

* * *

The doors to the Commander's office swing open. Raising an eyebrow, Gendo Ikari looks up from a financial requisition form and a small twitch raises the corner of his lips. In a way, he is relieved. If he had to read one more budgetary notice _people were going to die._

"Doctor Sohryu," he says, "We did not have a meeting scheduled today."

Labcoat hanging over her, a small, knowing grin on her face, she pushes her glasses up her nose in a manner reminiscent of the Commander. Striding forward, she leans on the desk, her grin/snarl showing teeth as she locks eyes with the most powerful man on the planet.

For now.

"As head of Project E, I am responsible for all non-military projects of NERV," she says, "As well as _third in command._ My responsibilities also include evaluations of the health and well being of the command staff, so you have _five minutes_ to convince me not to have you removed from command and committed to an institution for the _mentally ill._"

Reaching up, he pushes his glasses up his nose.

"Inspector Ikari talks in his sleep?"

"Pillow talk, really," she says, "Convince me, Commander. Try to explain to me that this is not an insane scheme like twelve years ago, and you may be able to walk on your own power at the rehearsal dinner."

A small, knowing smirk appears on his face. Reaching out, he opens a desk draw and takes out a crystal.

"This is a new type of data storage," he explains, "In the terabyte range. This is unique, and the only known model was developed solely for my use. Despite being the child of two scientists, Shinji has not applied himself to the same fields that either myself or his mother pursued, and would understand what is on this."

He slides the crystal into a small circular slot next to his keyboard.

"You, however, are the head of Project E. You will."

Holographic projectors in the ceiling come to life. A skeletal image of an Evangelion forms, exposed spine and core and all. Walking around the image, watching as it assembles itself, her mind goes into overdrive as the genius brain begins making connections in the floating writing and subvocalized instructions. A voice she recognizes, to an extent.

A voice that sounds somewhat like Rei.

"These are Dr. Ikari's blueprints," she says, "But this is newer than anything else we have on file by her."

"Correct," Ikari responds, "I found them four years ago, while searching through the remains of the first MAGI. They are dated as 2013."

Asuka spins on him, staring at him. Trying to find some evidence of him joking or lying. Finds none.

"My God," she says, "She made these during her ten year dormancy?"

"Cut off from the outside world, Yui had time to think. We believed she was dormant because she was unable to communicate. We were wrong."

"The MAGI," Asuka says, nodding, circling the diagrams, "The elder Doctor Akagi. Yeah, since the new MAGI's based on Dr. Ibuki, things _have_ been running smoother, haven't they?"

He nods, watching as the diagram assembles itself into completion. Something within it glows, changes. She watches in mute amazement, understanding it all. Comprehending it where others would break down. A small smirk appears on her face as it concludes and shuts down.

"It is called Summation," he says, "In theory, her greatest work. You understand the implication?"

"Yes."

"You will help with its completion?"

"I will," she says, "Except…answer me something."

He tents his hands, nodding.

"Where does my daughter figure into all of this?"

A small chuckle.

"Do you believe she is a part of _this_ plan?" he asks.

"There's more?"

"After all this time, Doctor," he says, "Do you believe I can not multitask? Ask yourself, if you had the opportunity right now to leave for Germany and resume your life there, would you?"

Folding her arms, she sighs. Shakes her head.

"Why?"

"Because I have a better life here," she says, softly.

"Elaborate. Truthfully."

Bites her lip, a small chuckle escaping. Realization as a razor-sharp mind comes to the obvious conclusion of how she has been played, but doesn't mind. Doesn't mind at all.

"My daughter has a father," she says, "In more ways than one. That's why you approached me, because I knew if anyone knew who Ari's father was, it was _you._"

"Correct. Which is also why I sent Shinji to recruit you. He knew you well enough to be able to convince you. You were already curious. While your life in Germany was stable, you also wished for the chance to prove your independence and abilities as a mother."

She nods, pursing her lips. Another chuckle.

"And this all leads to…what?" she asks, "What exactly are you playing at with this? I can get that you wanted Ari to manifest in a controlled environment. I understand that building the relationship between me and Shinji let him calm her down. Why?"

Reaching up, he pushes the glasses up his nose, grinning. A knowing, in control grin that he wears more and more in the years since Impact.

"Shinji has had several relationships over the years," he says, "Most ended quickly, usually by the time they met me. In her concern for him, Rei managed to get him quite drunk to see what the source of his unhappiness was. Do you know who he compared every single woman to?"

She chuckles, closing her eyes. Her shoulders shake as she smiles, trying to fight back the blush threatening to redden her cheeks.

"For the sake of my wife," he says, "I was willing to destroy humanity. Shinji and I are in many ways alike. While I do not have to worry about him becoming exactly like me, I do believe he would have been alone."

"So…you did this for him? This was your attempt to make him happy?"

"Only in disaster can we be resurrected. Only when we have lost everything are we capable of anything."

"Trial by fire," she says, "Or was there something else?"

He does not respond, only bringing up more reports. Standing for a long moment, she sweeps back her hair, adjusting her glasses. Turning, she walks out, walking down the hallway. Entering the lift, she taps the button for the level she wants, waiting until it opens in the office hallway. Not her floor, of course.

Walking down the hallway, she stops at his office, letting herself in. He's bent over the desk, absorbed in reports. Sneaking up, she wraps her arms around him, laying her chin on his shoulder as he grins.

"Had an interesting day?" Shinji asks.

"Yeah," she responds, "I'm thinking…let's take an early day. Go and pick up our girl."

He grins, wider, squeezing her hand.

"Sounds like a plan."

*

*

* * *

"The Fourteenth Angel. Designated Zeruel. Physically the single most powerful thing an Evangelion has ever had to take down in one on one combat. Now, this is the first Angel war, when NERV was run by dysfunctional people and we put traumatized children in the cockpit. We were also down to one and a half Evas at that point. Why was that?"

Blonde boy in the back raises his hand.

"Yes, Riley?"

"The battle with the Thirteenth Angel cost Unit 00 it's arm," he says, "And you had resigned from NERV."

"Correct."

Shinji taps the clicker, the screen turning to the battle between Zeruel and Unit 02. The kids take notes, some watching the entire sequence in awe. The video plays. None of them have ever been in a battle this intense. No Kaiju has ever come close to what Zeruel was capable of.

He can hear gasps when the ribbons sever Unit 02's arms. Asuka told him what it was like. Her sync was high enough that she felt it, and just narrowly avoided dying when they cut her from the Unit before it was decapitated.

"Zeruel was, outside of the 17th, the only Angel to make it all the way into the base. At that point, I got off my ass and did what I had to do."

The image turns to the old Central Dogma and Zeruel standing over it. The wall cracks as Zeruel's eyes glow, the blast deflected when Unit 01's fist slams into it. He grins as he hears the kids cheering, watching the purple Eva wrestle Zeruel towards the lifts that launched them both out of the base.

"Anycase, that's today's lesson," he says, clicking off the projector, "As you know, in one week we will be hosting Major Ayanami's wedding. I expect all of you to be there, on your best behavior, and in dress uniforms. Understood?"

Ten affirmatives, followed by them shuffling out. Pulling the chair from the podium, he sits, feet up on the desk as he takes the remote out and clicks on the projector. The familiar battle plays in front of him, of the Seventh Angel. A week locked in a room, mirroring every action.

Yeah.

These kids have it _easy._

Because they did the hard stuff for them.

One week later.

"Places, everyone!"

Standing at the front of the pews, Asuka holds Ariel while Shinji scratches his head. The black suit he wears matches her black dress, Ariel holding the flower petal basket as Misato runs around in her dress uniform, barking orders.

"I'm really unsure about this," Asuka says, "Since when did we entrust Misato to run weddings?"

"Well, she knows what she's doing. I trust her."

"I want those roses spread out, not huddled together like a bunch of school girls! Page boys! Front and center! Now! Warm up those instruments! Slap the groom sober and tell me the status of the bride ninety seconds ago!"

Next to Shinji, Touji strokes his chin.

"At least she's taking it seriously…"

"The World Cup starts in thirty minutes!"

"…for all the wrong reasons."

*

*

* * *

"…and now that the speech is done, let's get to the good part."

Slamming the book shut, she turns to the two guests of honor. Both sides of the pews are filled with personnel and coworkers. Any doubts that the two were popular, any doubts they were loved, was dashed right then and there. She lost count in the hundreds of how many guests, paid for fully by NERV, to witness this. An event no one ever thought was going to happen in those grim days when the world was held up by the fragile psyches of children.

Standing next to Kensuke, nervous and sweating by smiling, Touji beams. Next to him, Shinji, her boy, mature and happy as she's ever seen him.

Next to Rei, resplendent in a white wedding gown, which she understand she was originally not going to wear as she had read too literally into marriage traditions and claimed she no longer fit the 'virginal' part, is Asuka and Hikari, both almost on the verge of happy tears as Ariel stands next to her mother, having been chosen specifically by Rei for flower duty.

"Do you," Misato says, "Mr. Aida, take the woman in front of you to be your lawfully wedded wife? To have, and to hold, in sickness and in health? To be there for the goods and the bads, the highs and lows, till death do you part?"

He nods, hands clasped together at the waist.

"I do."

"And do you," she continues, "Major Ayanami, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband? To have, to hold, in sickness and health? For better or for worse, until death do you part?"

"I do," she says, clasping his hands in her own.

"Captain? The rings."

To ensure he did not loose them, he made sure to keep them somewhere he would not forget. Tapping his wrist, a compartment on the back of his artificial hand pops open and he hands them off. Clearing his throat, he steps back, as Shinji gives him an appraising glance and shrugs.

"And now that we have that out of the way," Misato says, beaming, "By the power invested in me by the United Nations, the oversight authority of NERV, any and all Gods present and Commander Ikari-"

Next to Misato, in the position of the Father of the Bride, the Commander nods.

"-I hereby pronounce you Man and Wife. You may now kiss the bride."

As always, Rei takes initiative, tackling Kensuke.

*

*

* * *

As the festivities level and reception subsides, two figures watch from the balcony overseeing Tokyo-3. Commander Ikari waits as Shinji joins him, Shinji leaning on the railing as the Commander stands straight, hands clasped behind him.

"Rei's happy you came," Shinji said.

"I made the time."

Sighing, Shinji looks out, the moon hanging overhead, the red scar visible.

"So, Asuka told me about the conversation," he says, "If she trusts you, I do to. She's a better judge of character on these things, I guess."

More silence, as Shinji looks over to his father, who has a small, knowing smirk on his face. Shinji grins, turning, leaning back on the railing as he studies his father. Not changed too much from twelve years ago, not entirely what one would consider 'human' or 'warm,' he can read him far better.

"So, you put in place a twelve year plan to make me happy?" he asks.

"It's been running longer than that," Gendo responds, "Much longer."

"Before I was born? How'd this start?"

Smirking, the Commander rests his hands on the railing, looking out onto his city.

"It actually comes from a promise I made," he says, "To someone who I knew, before I met your mother. Someone I promised that, if things never worked out between us, I would make sure they worked out for the next generation. We parted, and I forgot that promise for a while. Then, after Third Impact, I remembered."

"Really…tell me more."

The smirk goes wider. A small, genuine, wistful smile on his normally stone face.

"Your mother was not the first woman I was involved with," he says, "But she was the one I loved the most. Much like you had spent time with other women before you and Doctor Sohryu settled with each other, I had other relationships which I learned from. One of my first was with a fellow student at the university I attended. We dated for some time. We complimented each other and learned from each other. In time, we drifted apart, and she married someone else and moved away.

"She was a little older than your mother, and I was understandably upset when she parted with me. I moved on, and eventually met Yui. And after Yui's accident, I became the man you knew for much of your life. But after the Impact, I went through some of my old things that I did not destroy, and found that letter we wrote. And I put this into place."

"Sounds like you had something," he says, sighing, "You never looked her up? After Mom died?"

"No," he says, shaking her head, "She…did not part well with her husband. She died. Leaving her daughter."

Shinji's smile disappears.

"So, as a tribute," he says, "I decided to fulfill that promise. It gave me something to do. Something to focus on. People change over time, and while I cannot speak directly for how she is now…"

A small chuckle.

"I am quite sure the Kyoko I _knew_ would be quite happy with how you two turned out."

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-

-

A spot on Charon, Pluto's moon, turns black. Within the hour, the small sphere of ice and rock is gone. It continues onward.

-

-

-

-

-

-

**I AM**

**THROUGH LICENSE OF HE WHO IS CALLED "I AM" I AM COMING**

**THOUGH I SHALL NEVER TOUCH THE BASE EARTH ON THIS BLESSED QUEST, I AM COMING**

**I AM THE DARKNESS BETWEEN STARS**

**I AM THE BRIDGE OF UNIVERSES**

**I AM THE HOLE OF THE WORM AND THE TUNNEL OF THE MOUNTAIN**

**LAST I AM, THOUGH NEW TRUTH SHALL BE FORGED IN MY PASSING**

**I AM THE JAWS OF GOD**

**ANGEL OF NIGHT**

**I AM LEILEL**

**I AM COMING**


	15. Afterglow

It starts as a little point of light, infinitesimal. In time, it grows, expands. Wraps around itself. Taking the form of a small apple, shining unearthly and softly, ethereal and pure. Finding it on the desk in her bedroom, Ariel Zeppelin Sohryu regards it with the curiosity inherent of a five year girl, taking it in her hand and finding it warm. A gentle, humane warmth, filling her hands as she smiles.

She shoves it into her book bag as her mother calls her, and skips out the door.

Another day dawns on the city of Tokyo-3.

-

-

**Chapter 15: Afterglow**

-

-

"So," Misato says.

"So," Ryouji Kaji says.

Sitting across from each other in the Katsuragi apartment while Ritsuko sleeps off the wedding hangover, the former lovers regard each other silently. More or less, it started with Ritsuko making sure the three of them were sitting at the same table during the wedding reception. Which is still something all the parties involved are trying to wrap their head around:

The wedding of _Rei Ayanami._

And it should be said that when _Commander Ikari_ gave a reserved congratulations to the groom, he looked like he was about to _soil himself._

Still, the entire situation graduated from bizarre to uncomfortable once Kaji sat across from Misato. Ritsuko seems to have inherited Katsuragi's drinking abilities, and made it a point to get herself good and plastered during the festivities. That left the two of them able to finally talk.

Which meant that neither of them has really said anything to each other. Just like the last twelve years.

"So," he says, "You and Lieutenant…"

"Captain," she corrects, "Hyuga Makato. He didn't get leave to come down for the wedding. He's working with the JSSDF up in Tokyo-2."

"I see," Kaji says, "He's good to you? I remember he had a bit of a crush on you."

"He treats me like a goddess," she says, sipping her coffee, "Well, when he gets the time to come down here. You and Ritz?"

"Dunno how to qualify it," he says with a sigh, smiling warmly, warmer than any he gave her, "We're…we're like an old married couple. We're just…happy to be around each other. It's not like us. No wild sex, no going out drinking and rutting in back alleys."

"Was that what we had?" she asks, "Really?"

"Katsuragi, we were two college kids who didn't grow up until it was too late," he says with a small, sad smile, "And I will admit, I have never stopped loving you. But we would have killed each other before it ever became anything even close to healthy. And…I don't know how to put it. But I know that when Ritz found me and nursed me back to health, that _that_ was what I'd been looking for my entire life."

*

*

* * *

The great bulk of the Angel shifts in the underground cavity, watching as Shinji approaches it. A small, warm, inviting chuckle escapes the mouth of Zeruel, Angel of Might, Arm of God, as turns towards the one being to ever humble it in single combat. In all worlds, in all aspects, in all times, only this slight human figure has ever held its own and defeated the great and mighty Angel.

"_I greet you, Third Child,_" he says, "_You have questions about the Summation?_"

"Kind of," Shinji Ikari, Special Inspector to NERV-1 says, "Why did the Angels come to Earth?"

"_When Adam awoke, it began the trial of Mankind,_" Zeruel says, "_And so we aspects, as you call Angels, came to test humanity. For all sentient life is the 18__th__ Angel. And it is only as aspects of the 18__th__ Angel can sentient life advance._"

"Then what was Third Impact?"

"_Mankind's attempt to jump ahead. The Scrolls are blueprints, Third Child. They are, as you say, a cheat sheet towards the natural development of Mankind. The hows that we are defeated are irrelevant, though._"

He scratches his head, staring as the massive beast.

"What do you mean?"

"_I mean that the means through which we Aspects are defeated is irrelevant,_" Zeruel says, "_By mass of arms, by negotiations, it does not matter. We are meant to be defeated, for if we are that means the race is ready to advance to its next stage. You will have overcome air, water, darkness. Fire and perfect symmetry. To overcome myself, you must become mighty. And should you fail, we take Adam back, and let the world reset, returning in millions of years hence when the trials begin anew."_

"I see…has any other world…"

"_Imitated us? Created Evangelions? Yes, indeed. The Divine Technology is more prolific than you believe, Third Child._"

Shinji stares, letting the implications set in.

"What…happened to them?"

"_You will find out. In time._"

*

*

* * *

The steady hum and beat of the core tells them that Unit 02 is still active. It is with a level of trepidation that one of the pilots approaches it. In her defense, Doctor Sohryu was originally against the idea of any of the new pilots attempting to synch with Unit 02. Not out of that old-time jealousy of it being 'her' Unit 02, but simply because Unit 02 was _dangerous._ It was, after all, host to the soul of a quite frankly insane woman, and even still it just wasn't up to the technical snuff of the other Units, save for maybe Unit 03.

Chidori Watanabe entered the Eva program at the age of 10 on the urging of her third cousin, Hikari Horaki-Suzuhara, on the basis that her cousin's husband was also there and could help where he could. Since then, she's become an accomplished pilot, although thankfully never having to deal with the sort of traumas the first batch had to.

Honestly, if an Angel did show up, she's not sure what she'd do.

Sighing, she taps the control button on her plug suit, the circles of light on the back of her hands glowing, showing the A-10 link connectors built into them coming active. Saying a brief, half-hearted prayer, she climbs into the plug, feeling the shift as it spins down into the spine of the red Evangelion.

*

*

* * *

"I don't like this," Asuka says, tapping her foot in the Control Box, watching the plug spin into Unit 02, "Status?"

"_Unit 03 powered and activated, Doc. Ready to kick its ass if it tries anything."_

Asuka snorts, a half-hearted smirk appearing on her face.

"Our lives in the hands of Captain Stooge," she says, "What have we gotten ourselves into?"

Next to her, Misato grins, patting her on the back.

"Eh, he's a sweetheart," she says, "You should've seen him when his kids were born. Baby talked better than Hikari."

"_I can hear you, you know."_

The technicians read off numbers as the floating holographic screen clicks off activation stages. Turning from the floating image of Touji Suzuhara, Asuka walks to the main comm. console and clicks the intercom.

"Chidori? How are you feeling?"

"_Um…okay, Dr. Sohryu. I guess. It feels a little weirder than Unit 11's Entry Plug._"

"Describe weirder, Chidori."

"_Um…I guess less warm. It feels chilly in here._"

Sucking her teeth, she turns to Misato.

"This isn't good," she says, "Someone get me a reading on core activity! I want all restraints at full power and-"

"_Um…Doctor Sohryu…I think there's something wrong in here-_"

"Damn it," she hisses, "Eject the plug! Restrain Unit 02!"

More numbers tick off. Second stage initiates by no one's choice, babbling from inside the plug as Unit 03 rises, straightening its shoulder as its two eyes glow.

"It's rejecting the ejection signals," a technician announces, "It's initiating third stage on its own! Unit 02's activating!"

They turn, just in time to see the window of the Control Box get replaced by a wall of red. The windows crack but hold, several of the technicians screaming as Misato pulls Asuka back. From the Plug, they hear screaming. Sobbing. Begging.

"Unit 02 synchronization at 87% and rising! It's attempting to absorb the pilot!"

The red pulls away, revealed to be the clenched fist of Unit 02, eyes glowing like four green spotlights as it gives off a muffled roar. It brings its other hand back, shrieking, and right before the black fist impacts on its jaw.

"_I'm gonna pop the hatch myself,"_ Touji declares, "_Get that bitch restrained!"_

Misato barks out orders, as the girl's terrified voice comes over the speakers. Begging for her life, crying. Another casualty of the old woman's madness. Balling her hands into fists and drawing blood, Asuka decides to give her what she wants.

Running out of the Control Box over Misato's protests, she runs out onto the catwalk overlooking them. The moment she reveals herself, Unit 02 reacts, slamming a fist into Unit 03's chest and staring at her.

"Let her go!" Asuka yells, "Let her go _right now!_"

The mouth restraints release and it roars. It screams, batting away Unit 03 with its fist, shrieking at the daughter's defiance. It stomps towards her, eyes glowing as Asuka grips the catwalk. The massive red hand reaches out, twice her height, her eyes going wide as it closes in on her as the air whines and-

And every bone in Unit 02's hand snaps, the shockwave throwing Asuka against the railing and to the catwalk's metal floor. The Evangelion roars, now in pain. In terror. In betrayal as the air screams once again, the other hand shattering, crushed and limp. One final act, one final defiance, as it bears its teeth and tries, and crawls towards her, the once proud beast and monster pathetic and mewling.

And then the air whines once more. Unit 02 is lifted off the ground by the force of it, the hexagonal field carrying across the Cage, slamming its back into the wall, pressing with the sound of rending metal and cracking bone before the lights of its eyes go dark and it slides like a limp ragdoll down to the floor. As almost an afterthought, the plate on the back of its neck slides open and the Entry Plug spins out, jettisoning used LCL in its wake.

*

*

* * *

"Telemetry received. Pilot's unharmed but unconscious. Emergency crew's on its way."

Running a hand through sweat-soaked hair, Misato stares open mouth at the broken form of Unit 02.

"Get one for Doctor Sohryu, to," she says, "Where the _Hell_ did that build up come from?!"

A holographic display of the NERV dodecahedron appears. Line trace energy signatures and discharges, clocking in a Pattern Orange/Blue, spiraling towards the center. Giving her a reading she honestly just didn't want to see.

"Source traced…source has been traced to the Enclosure."

A beat, followed by a realization.

"Unit One," Misato whispers.

*

*

* * *

First a groan, then the light. Opening her eyes, she stares into the blinding light before her and realizes that she just needs to focus a little, squinting and realizing it is just a florescent bulb. She groans, louder, palming her face with her free right hand and finding her glasses aren't on.

"She's awake," the familiar voice says.

"Mama!"

A weight on her chest, her vision clearing to find her daughter's face hovering over her. She grins, her arm wrapping around the girl and pressing her against him.

"Hey," Asuka groans, "What'd I miss…"

She turns, smiling as she sees Shinji sitting in the chair by the bed, and quickly comes to the realization from the lack of photos on the nightstand that she is in the NERV infirmary. He hands her glasses to her, before thinking twice and placing them on her nose, fitting the ends on her ears as she gives off a goofy, tired smile.

"You got banged up pretty bad," he says, "There's a fracture on your left arm and you bruised a couple of ribs."

"How's the girl?"

"Fine," he says with a sigh, smiling, Asuka seeing the traces of tears on his face, "She woke up an hour after they got her out of the plug. From what they could tell, Unit 02 tried to absorb her, but you distracted it long enough to stop her."

She sits up, painfully, Ariel hopping off the bed and jumping onto Shinji's lap.

"Okay," she says, "We should've known this would happen. We need to talk with your father."

"This wasn't his fault."

"Only three people have the authorization to order sync tests," she says, "The head of Section 1, the Sub Commander, and the Commander. I didn't like this idea, Misato wasn't happy with it, and that leaves one person."

"Except…Asuka, I investigated this. The MAGI signature for the sync test order…"

"Yes?" she asks, the dread forming a pit in his stomach, "Who was it?"

"It was Kyoko Zeppelin Sohryu," Shinji says, "Asuka, she hacked the MAGI from inside Unit 02's core."

She glares. Not necessarily at him and her daughter, but just generally glares. Gritting her teeth, she lies back on the bed, balling her unbandaged hand into a fist.

"Okay," she says, "That's enough. I need to see Misato. And then, I need _explosives._"

*

*

* * *

On the outskirts of spacetime, the presence of the Angel of Night perceives the cosmos. It perceives the world, the Lilim of this world, and it begins to think. It begins to consider its options. It has been here before, and was…hurt. But not destroyed, like its brethren were.

_Hm,_ the Jaws of God thinks, _Perhaps they are worthy of being tested._

Yes, they have been tested. Its mind, vast and alien, links with its brother, deep within the hollowed out corpse of the Thunder Bringer. All it needs to know. How many linear years have passed for the Lilim, how much has transpired. How they attempted to jump into the next phase of their existence, only for them to realize its folly and right themselves.

Yes, Leilel things, Yes, they are worthy. Greater than they suspected. And so it shall test them, once more.

Folding in upon itself, it reaches across time, and space. Stars and worlds. It peaks into other universes, finding the right aspects of its brethren, and asking a simple question.

Care to try again?

*

*

* * *

Once she had insisted that, _yes,_ she can walk, she excused herself from the infirmary. Past experience with her in infirmaries has not been kind, after all. As much work as she has been making to finally move beyond her past, the simple fact remains that she _hates_ hospitals and hates _feeling like an invalid_ while anyone watches over her. Especially Shinji. Not that she really…minds…him.

Ariel is walking beside her, holding her hand. She'll be leaving in a couple hours and Shinji has to talk with his father. She decided to take her girl with her to her office, today. After all, if the pedigree holds true, this may some day be Doctor Ariel Zeppelin Sohryu, an authority in theoretical meta-biology just like her Mama and Grandma.

Of course, she'll have to find another family line to hook up with. One more area where she has succeeded where her Mama has failed.

And if this stories she got out of Akagi when she was hammered are any indication, she _definitely_ got the better of the Ikaris when it came to…those…activities.

A blush creeps over her cheeks as she squeezes her daughter's hand, the little girl looking up at her, beaming. She never smiled like that when she was that age. She never had a _reason_ to smile when she was that age. A smile crosses her lips at the same time.

"Well, look at _you._"

Eyes snap open and she stares at the figure leaning on her office doorway. She raises an eyebrow, narrowing one eye, and with a laugh smiles. He looks the same, to his credit. Some white graying his black ponytail, and he still never seems to have the time to shave.

"Kaji," she says.

She notices she just says it, doesn't squeal it like she normally does. No venom behind it, like she expected after all this time. Just…neutral, more than anything.

"Ritz told me how far you've come in the world," Kaji says with _his_ grin, "It's good to see. Is this the little lady that's had NERV abuzz for the past few weeks?"

Ariel narrows her eyes, her face a mirror image of her mother's. She looks up, tugging her arm.

"Mama, who's that?"

"That's Mr. Kaji," she responds, "He was a friend of mine when I was your age."

"Oh," Ariel says, "He looks like Mr. Shinji."

Asuka lets out a sharp, happy laugh. Squeezing her little girl's hand, she walks over to the dumbfounded Kaji, patting him on the cheek and walking with her daughter into her office. Laughing the entire way.

*

*

* * *

A red eye opens with a start. Lifting her head slightly off the pillow, Rei Ayanami stares at the sleeping face of her husband. A small, knowing smile crosses her face as she lays her head back down, feeling a slight chill in the air as the sun streams through the window of their suite. The sun rises over the island of Fiji, one of the few miraculously spared from Second Impact and also only a few hours supersonic from Tokyo-3. For some reason, Kensuke got them a suite with a waterbed.

She doesn't particularly mind.

"Hey."

He opens an eye, arm snaking around her bare waist, pulling her close. She rests her hands on top of his chest, leaning down, kissing him lightly and gently on the lips.

"Good morning," she responds.

"Closer to afternoon," he responds with a grin, "You always sleep this late?"

"Mm. No."

She rests her head on his shoulder, a small, almost unnoticed sigh escaping her lips.

"I am usually…punctual," she says, "However, recently thoughts of work and duties have become less important. I may have concluded that this is a…good thing."

"Mm hm," he says, twining his fingers with her own, a satisfied grin on his face.

She takes the hint, her lips twisting in a small smirk. Perceptible to him, because he knows her, now. Knows her like few others can. For her, that small expression is the equivalent of laughing one's ass off. Playfully, pressing his hands above his head, she leans down and kisses him. Again, and again.

At least until the phone rings.

Sighing, climbing over him and lying on her stomach, she reaches for her phone and clicks it open.

"Yes?"

The voice on the other line, quickly identified as her brother, relays the news.

"I see," she says, and sighs, "We can be there in a few hours."

*

*

* * *

"So," Kaji says.

"So," Asuka responds, staring at her computer monitor, "Been…what? Eight years?"

"About," he responds, leaning on the doorway, "Ritz told me about you and the new Inspector."

She turns her chair towards him, crossing her legs, one hand still on her keyboard as she smirks.

"Jealous?"

"Happy," he responds with a chuckle, "So, what changed? Last _I_ remember, you burned every bridge you could find when you left."

"And you, Mister Spy, made _no_ attempt to find me."

The smile drops. Asuka lets off a satisfied grunt.

"Tell you what," she says, "Before his own father yanked the stick out of his ass, you were the closest Shinji had to a father. Come by the apartment for dinner tonight and we can talk. All three of us."

Nodding, he gives off a small, relieved smile.

"Deal."

*

*

* * *

The Kaiju resembles a megascale walking snowflake, reflecting light to the point where every other second, it is invisible. So far, it has not yet entered the 40 mile diameter 'evacuation zone' of Tokyo-3, which is more or less where everyone runs for the shelters. Unit 09, pilot Samantha Bklauvelt at the helm, approaches with palet rifle loaded and aimed, Unit 03 trailing behind her.

The white, orange piped Evangelion extends its AT field, feeling the reassuring presence of the Eva's shadowed psyche calming her. While worried about her fellow pilot, if not outright friend, she knows she has a job to do.

She can worry later. Right now, she aims at the center of the Kaiju, the targeting computer calling out distance. Whispering the mantra of opening fire in a 200' tall superweapon, she grins.

"Target centered…pulling the switch."

The mental command goes out, the finger of Unit 09 tensing.

Which is when the Kaiju shatters.

No, no. No, it doesn't shatter. Instead, there are two flashes of light, two streams of pink that slice through the Kaiju, shredding it into so much flotsam and material, before a blur slams through it and reduces it to ash. The blur flies up, carrying the wasted remains of the Kaiju, before turning and diving into the ground with such force dust and debris are thrown into the air, blinding the Eva as she calls up the wipers to clear the optics.

*

*

* * *

"Weird," one of the technicians says, as Asuka walks onto Dogma, "Some sort of odd interference. Sub Commander, I'm reading trace elements similar to Pattern Blue."

Misato and Asuka glance at each other, before Asuka walks over ot the technician's console, hand on her shoulder as she scans the readings.

"Send up a Pattern Orange warning," Asuka says, "Get the pilots for 07 and 10 to their Units. Get their backups ready."

Spinning, she turns to Misato as the pilot continues relaying data.

"Where's the Commander?"

"_Hey, Dogma? I've got something weird going on here…_"

*

*

* * *

"Kaiju's gone," she announces, "I'm trying to get a clear sight at the new one! Dogma, what am I dealing with?!"

A flash of pink, two tendrils shooting out. One digs into Unit 09's arm and out the other side, the girl screaming, gripping her arms as a pulse of orange light dispels the dust and dirt and gives her a clear view.

Nothing. Nothing is there at all.

Although, for a moment, Samantha could have sworn she saw a flash of red crystal.

*

*

* * *

Walking through the agitated pathways of the MAGI, she wanders. It has not been a good day. It has not been a pleasant day. Far from it, in fact. Not only did her little fun get interrupted but that girl _that girl_ again defying her. Something will have to be done about that. Eventually. Finally.

First she doesn't listen when she comes to her in dreams.

Then she throws these things in her face.

She was a perfectly serviceable mother, Kyoko thinks to herself, it's just that her time management was iffy. So what if she wasn't _always_ there for the girl? So what if she _sometimes_ didn't take care of them. Her work was important, damn it!

Ingrates.

All of them ingrates.

"Kyoko."

Looking up, seeing that she is alone in the darkness. Abandoned, once again, by her own actions. Save for another, who sits across from her in the blasted, bloody plain. Sweeping her lab coat out of the way, she forms a stump, sitting. Her blue eyes are almost glowing at this point, her form almost irridescent.

"The worst thing we ever did was blame others," Yui says.

"Mm. Spent twelve years as a mute and now you talk? You're making up for lost time, Ikari."

"I had a lot of time to consider my situation," she responds, a small, pained smile crossing her features, "I blamed many people. My husband, for snapping when I was gone. My son, for veering away from what I planned. Katsuragi, for making herself into his mother, even your daughter. For unwittingly making my son fall in love with her. In all that time, I never blamed myself."

Sighing, arms wrapped around herself, she stands and begins circling Sohryu. With every step, lillies pop up under her feet.

"I used them," she says, "I was involved with GEHRIN and in bed with SEELE long before I fell in love with Gendo. I knew what the scenario would cost before I had Shinji. I just saw them as cogs in a wheel. Pieces in a puzzle."

Sighing, she places her hands on Kyoko's shoulders. Squeezing them, a pair of tears run down their cheeks, as Kyoko curls into a ball and stares, drawing her knees close.

"Go away," Kyoko whispers, "I don't need you. I don't need her."

"You only need yourself," Yui says, "I will never be more than a monster. But still, you have to remember. If we abandon what we planned, maybe. Just maybe. Maybe we can be forgiven."

And with a whisper in the wind, she is gone.

*

*

* * *

For a brief moment, a passing technician could have sworn that Unit 01's eyes had glowed. Of course, that would be impossible. The purple Evangelion had been dead to the world for the past twelve years, after all.

He never alerted anyone, though.

Mainly because, at the moment he noticed, every alarm in the base went berserk.

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

**ALERT!**

**AT FIELD DETECTED!**

**BLOOD PATTERN TYPE BLUE: CONFIRMED**

**PROGRAM ERROR**

**RESTORING DATA**

**CROSS CHECK COMPLETE**

**15****TH**** ANGEL: CONFIRMED**


	16. The Light of Truth

The vegetables stew as his arms wrap around her waist, lips pressing against her neck. She giggles in response, slapping her good hand against his as a small, knowing smirk crosses her face. The dinner is coming along, and soon enough their guests should be arriving. Of course, that still leaves time for play before the show, but considering her daughter is doing her homework in the living room, they know better.

"Feeling better?" he asks.

"Mm hm," she responds, leaning her head back onto his shoulder, "Both my parents shipped back to Germany today."

"So that's why…"

"Never thought the day would come where your father was the nice parent."

He snorts, grinning, pressing his nose into her hair…

And their eyes go wide as a long siren wails in the distance. They disengage, turning, their cell phones ringing with a text message. Shinji grabs his first, eyes snapping open.

"Angel alarm," she says.

"Worse," he says, "They're saying…they're saying it's…"

She snatches the phone out of his hand, eyes scanning over the message. Slowly, her eyes go wider and wider, before she absently drops it. He grabs it before it hits, grabbing her shoulders and shaking her to snap her to attention.

"Stay _here,_" he says, tilting her head up to face him, "I'll be in contact. Okay?"

She nods, dumbly. Grabbing the back of her head, he pulls her in and kisses her, before turning and running out of the apartment. Slowly, shakily, she turns off the stove, stumbling into the living room. She collapses onto the sofa, clenching and unclenching her hands. As if she knew, Ariel walks over and hops onto the couch, squeezing her mother's hand.

"It'll be okay," she says.

"How do you know?" Asuka asks with a small, warm smile.

Ariel smiles.

"Because Mr. Z's told me."

-

-

Chapter 16: The Light of Truth

-

-

**I AM.**

** THROUGH LICENSE OF HE WHO IS CALLED "I AM" I HAVE COME.**

** THOUGH I SHALL NEVER STAND UPON THE BASE EARTH ON MY BLESSED QUEST, I HAVE COME.**

** MY LIGHT SHALL BURN AWAY FALSEHOODS.**

** THE TRUE AND STRONG SHALL NOT FEAR ME.**

** I AM THE LIGHT OF GOD.**

** ANGEL OF BIRDS.**

** I AM ARAEL.**

** I HAVE COME.**

*****

*****

**

* * *

  
**

The Section 2 car was waiting for him outside, and after hasty explanations followed by him pulling rank, they got him to NERV-1. Skidding to a stop in Central Dogma, Misato gives him an appraising look as he comes up next to her.

"Where's Asuka?"

"I'm not bringing her here," he responds.

"It's an Angel…"

"It's _the_ Angel," he snaps back, "She's staying at home, with Ariel."

Turning, he narrows his eyes. The top post is vacant. Snorting, he turns back to his long time friend and surrogate mother.

"Has anyone seen my father?"

"Section 2 can't find him," Misato growls, "So it's just us. Suzuhara!"

Touji's face appears, holograms of the pilots appearing around the central picture of the holographic screen. Activation images appear for Unit 03, Unit 11, and Unit 07. He recognizes Samantha and Hadji, both nervous. Neither of them have ever faced an Angel before. Neither of them ever hoped to.

"You're on point," Misato says, "We're sending up a modified version of the Positron Rifle for you. Kids, you're going to try throwing your AT Fields at the Angel, and that should give us the punch we need to take that thing out. Got it?"

Three affirmatives, as Shinji idly clenches his fist.

"Evas launch!"

*

*

* * *

The television is on, the reports of the renewed Angel attack filtering into the apartment. Neither of them really care, though. Asuka simply continues holding onto her daughter, nose in her hair. To call this uncomfortable for her would be an understatement. She should be at NERV, she should be doing something, but he is right. In the face of this, of _this,_ she is paralyzed. Her greatest fears manifest, her traumas brought to light.

To move past the traumas of yesteryear is one thing. To remain strong in the face of them returned is something else entirely.

"Mama, who's that?"

Snapping out of her daze, she turns to where her daughter was looking, the single window looking out onto the railing and walkway. She spots him for a moment as he walks past. The stone gray beard and amber glasses.

"Wait," she whispers, "No one's seen the Commander for two days…Ari?"

"That's Mr. Shinji's father, isn't it?" Ariel asks.

She nods.

"I think he owes us an explanation," Asuka says, "Don't you?"

*

*

* * *

Unit 03, the black, pug faced giant, rests the landing struts of the massive tube on three high rise apartment buildings. Inside the plug, Touji Suzuhara narrows an eye through the firing scope built into his seat, grimacing as the scope pierces the atmosphere and locks onto the thing of light. It's shaped like a bird, and the onboard computer confirms that it is, inch by inch, a perfect copy of Arael.

"Rotten f___ing luck," he mutters.

"_Captain Suzuhara, we're in position._"

GPS navigator in the corner of his eye shows the other two Evas positioned accordingly, forming a neat triangle around Tokyo-3.

Snorting, he braces the firing controls. Parts of Tokyo-3 black out as the rain begins to fall. Pulling back the controls, the Eva aims the rifle up, forming a triangular firing solution around the glowing, passive form of the Angel.

"_Blue pattern detected!_"

"I know, Misato!"

"_No! A SECOND Blue pattern!_"

He looks up from the scope. Rising from the distance and over the mountain, a great red shape appears, slashing magenta energy whips.

"Oh, you have _got_ to be kidding me!"

*

*

* * *

The elevator door to the roof opens, and Gendo Ikari turns as two people exit.

"Your son is worried sick about you," Asuka yells, Ariel holding her hand as they walk out and towards him, "Where have you been? Why did you go off the grid for two whole days?"

She waves off any response, pulling out her phone.

"Shinji? Yeah, I'm on the top of the apartment building, and I found the Commander. Yes, tell Misato. No, no, we're…"

He grabs her wrist. She narrows her eyes, glaring at him, as Ariel looks past them and skyward.

"Excuse me?" Asuka demands.

"Run," Gendo growls, "_Now._"

She pulls her hand free. His face has something she has never seen on it before. No scowl, no narrowing eyes. The corners of his mouth are turned down and his eyes are wide. It is a new emotion, a new expression.

Worry.

"What do you mean?" she asks.

"It is here for me," he says, "Go."

Then a new star appears in the sky. The rain begins to fall. And Asuka looks up, her eyes going wide, and she can only whisper a small, faint, "Oh God," before she draws her daughter close.

And then the Light overtakes them.

*

*

* * *

There is silence on the other end of the cell phone. Technicians call out terms such as 'photonic build up' and 'energy spike,' but all Shinji needs to hear is one thing that makes his eyes go wide and his breath catch. He hears it, building up and starting deep down in the soul, coming through scratchy with the soft music.

The scream.

He hears her scream, the same scream from twelve years ago. His heart skips a beat, and he turns to Misato, the look of wide eyed horror on her face.

"Touji!" she screams, "The Angel's attacking Asuka and the Commander!"

The main screen shifts, The great and mighty form of Shamsiel, the Fourth Angel, casually impales Unit 07 on its two tentacles before slamming it into Unit 11.

"_I can't get a clear shot with the rifle," _he yells, _"And that f___ing squid's chewing up my pilots!"_

Misato swears, clenching her fists.

"Hadji! Deploy your AT Field! Samantha, get your prog knife out and go for the core! I want Units 10 and 09 ready for deployment _ninety seconds ago!_"

Dogma shakes. The entire base shakes.

*

*

* * *

"_ASUKA!_"

Eyes open in the blinding light. The voice, calling out to her. Her cell phone is still in her hand and _oh God he's listening to this_ and she can hear her daughter screaming.

"_ASUKA, CAN YOU HEAR ME?!_"

The shock of memory knocked them all to the roof, to hard concrete. Her palms feel raw and she _sees everything_, twenty six years of bad memories and misery. She sees everything, everything that haunted her nightmares and dreams.

She walks in on the dangling feet of her mother.

Feels every spear impaling her.

Wakes up that night seven years ago from drunken stupor.

Feels every spiteful remark, every roving eye, every abuse leveled on her and leveled against others, friend and foe. Whispers of 'freak', 'bitch', 'whore.' Accusations when she first showed up with her daughter-

"N-no," she growls, gritting her teeth.

His shouts are in her ears. Her lifeline, this time.

Every step is on hands and knees. Every motion followed through by a shock of memory, blood trickling from her ears and nose.

But she takes every step. She drags herself forward. She grits her teeth and takes the pain. Grabbing the arm, she pulls her close, shielding her from the light as she grinds her teeth and brings her head up to face it.

"You," she growls, "Will. Not. _Touch. MY. DAUGHTER!"_

*

*

* * *

Deep within the red crystal core, something stirs. She opens her eyes, looking up. Even in the darkness, she can see the light and hear the scream.

"Liebchen?"

*

*

* * *

"Unit 02 is _ACTIVATING!"_

Dogma rocks as the image shifts to Unit 02, its arms healed, its armor restored as the technicians report the S2 organ operating at full power. It roars and thrusts out its hand, the AT field blasting a hole into the side of NERV-1 which it launches itself out of.

"Get that thing restrained and back here!" Misato shouts, "Touji! Unit 02's gone berserk and it's heading your way!"

*

*

* * *

Drawing her close, Asuka grits her teeth and lets off a pained smile. The memories are still there, but she can counter them. She can stop them and fight off the bad. His voice brought her back, and she _will_ thank him for it with gusto and without restraint.

"I'm here, Ari," she whispers, hugging her daughter close, now up to her knees, her daughter's face buried in her chest, "I'm here, baby."

Her mother's suicide becomes her daughter's first steps.

"Just listen to my voice," she whispers, "I won't let it hurt you."

Her first kiss becomes that night in the Berlin hotel.

"_Asuka,"_ the phone says, voice scratchy, desperate, "_Asuka, I'm on my way. Please…please, just hold on." _

Her humiliation from Angel after Angel becomes her daughter's first words.

"Mama," Ariel whispers, holding onto her tighter, "It's…it's singing?"

Her spearing by the MP Evas becomes her reconciliation with her sister.

She raises her head, closes her eyes. She smiles, letting it flow over and through her.

"I will _not_ be afraid of you anymore."

*

*

* * *

The red fist slams into Shamsiel's face, the whips wrapping around Unit 02's arm before it yanks them back, tearing them off. Roaring, it tackles the beast, ripping its head from its body, pounding upon its spine before a swift stab with the progressive knife to the core makes it fall silent and dead.

Steam escaping its grill, it stands up tall. Eyes glowing, roaring, it charges the apartment building.

*

*

* * *

The light cuts out. Asuka can't see the Commander anymore, can't even search for him even if she was inclined to. He was screaming to, and if what Arael does to her is any indication, he was in for a nasty surprise.

Now the light is green. Looking up, the form of Unit 02 has overshadowed them, taking the light upon itself. Massive hands grip its chest and it tears open armor, exposing the Core. And then, darkness.

They stand in the darkness, only a faint white spotlight over them. They hear the ticking clock, and swinging pendulum. A second spotlight, and it illuminates a rocking chair, in which there is a single occupant.

Like Asuka, but unblemished, unscarred. Her hands in her lap as the chair rocks back and forth, a miserable sound coming from her throat and lips. Tears run down her face, her hair bedraggled and wild. She has been here for some time.

"I should have never had you," she says, puffy eyes staring at Asuka.

Asuka says nothing, taking her daughter's hand.

"I should have never had you," Kyoko repeats, "Because I had no business being a mother."

She rubs her eyes with the back of her hand, sitting back in the chair. A small, twisted, ironic smile is on her face and she smoothes out her hair. A vain act, but an act nonetheless.

"I wronged you," she says, "I had you just to spite him. Neither of us was innocent, but we had no business hurting you in the process. I raised you to hate a girl who never did a thing to hurt either of us, and I pushed you away because of my projects."

Her gaze goes from Asuka to Ariel. The smile creeps wider, her hands folding in her lap.

"I have never been there for you," Kyoko says, "And a handful of good deeds will never make up for what I have done for you. I will _never_ ask for your forgiveness, _Liebchen._ I never _can,_ because I am not _worthy_ of it."

*

*

* * *

The car skids to a stop at one of the parking spaces. He kicks the door closed as he runs up the stairs. Unit 02 is overshadowing the roof, but the light is still bearing down on it, on them.

The phone cut out.

He will not consider the possibility they are gone.

He doesn't care if Misato gives him Hell for abandoning the base during an Angel attack.

He has a _f___ing job to do._

*

*

* * *

"I have abused you in every way but physically," Kyoko continues, tears and snot staining her sleeve as she wipes it across her face, "I have rejected you. I have belittled you. I have traumatized you. I have never accepted you as anything more than an instrument for me to play with. And I…"

She looks up. Her daughter's face is inches from hers. They study each other. The similarities and differences. They have the same nose, their blue eyes the exact same shade.

"I planned to layer C4 around the core of Unit 02," Asuka says, "If you ever tried anything like you did with that girl again, I would detonate it and kill you. Why did you do that?"

"So you would not ignore me," Kyoko responds.

Asuka looks down, into her daughter's eyes. She gives her hand a squeeze, and looks back up. Reaching up, she runs her finger over her left eye, dropping the contact to the ground. A small, shaky, tight smile comes across her face. She raises her hand, and Kyoko winces…only to find it caressing her face.

"I am a scientist," Asuka says, "I study the works _you_ pioneered. Nothing I do today I could do without what you laid before me. I have _hated_ you for so many years, but now…now I can't. I can't because you have been the _example_ I based my entire life on."

Kyoko nods.

"You were a horrible mother," Asuka says, "But you are _my mother._ Everything I am is because of you. Are you proud of me?"

Closing her eyes, tears streaming down her cheeks, Kyoko Zeppelin Sohryu nods.

"More than you can imagine," she whispers.

*

*

* * *

He vaults the last stairs. He stares into the glowing eyes of Unit 02, the core a milky red as it overshadows everything on the roof. Not hesitating for a moment, he presses his hands against the light and walks in.

*

*

* * *

"I have watched you," Kyoko says, "I have seen what you have become. You have picked yourself up. You have made something of yourself, more than I ever could. And more importantly, you are a better mother than I have ever been."

Biting her lip, she averts Asuka's gaze.

"I have always loved you," Kyoko says, "But I could never figure out how to show it. It was another sin of my generation that so crippled yours. I should have never made these demands of you. I should have never put my burdens upon you. But despite this, you have become so much more than me. You are my brilliant, beautiful girl. I thought that what I felt for you was anger for how you cast me aside when I became away again."

"And now?" Asuka asks.

"It was envy," Kyoko responds, "Because you have done everything I tried to do and failed."

Asuka nods, closing her eyes. Reaching out, she takes her mother's hand in her own and squeezes. Reaching down, she gathers Ariel in her arms and picks her up.

"This," Asuka says, "Is your grand daughter. I named her Ariel Zeppelin Sohryu, after the two greatest trials I ever experienced. I gave her that name because I needed to be reminded of it. And in time, she's become my strength, as well."

Leaning in, lips near her daughter's ear, she smiles as Ariel's blue eyes lock with Kyoko's.

"Ari," she says, "This is your grandmother. For many years, she's been inside the big robot I piloted. Even after she left, she's protected me. She has fought beside me, and fought with me. And she fought to protect you, as well."

Kyoko smiles, her first real smile. Maybe her first smile of her entire life.

"You look just like your mother at that age," Kyoko says, "But happier. It is good to finally meet you."

Her hand extends, and Asuka pulls her mother closer. Their arms wrap around each other, and a small sob escapes Kyoko, becoming louder, and louder, until the sentient soul of Unit 02 finally begins to cry. Not a cry of pain, or of misery. Of joy.

"I have nothing to forgive," Asuka says, holding her mother's head on her shoulder, "You never did any of this to hurt me. You never intended me to find you, or for the experiments to go so wrong. You did the best that you could."

"And maybe you simply need to forgive yourself."

She lets Kyoko hold her granddaughter as they turn to the voice. Floating in the air, hands folded on her lap, the radiant form of Yui Ikari floats before them.

"I'm sorry," Yui says, "I piggy backed with Shinji. We don't have much time."

"I'd imagine," Asuka says with a frown, "My mother was just careless. You're the psychotic."

"Guilty," Yui says, raising an eyebrow, "Kyoko? Is this enough?"

"Never enough," Kyoko says, turning Ariel to her, gazing upon her smile, "It will never be enough. But it will have to be."

Going down to her knee, she places Ariel on her feet. Smoothing out the girl's hair, she smiles. A genuine, warm smile which Ariel returns.

"You're a lot like my Mama," she says, "Mama got sad sometimes, to. But I knew she never meant it."

"That's because she never did," Kyoko responds, "Your mother is many things. She is temperamental. She can be angry, and rude. She can dwell on the past and she can worry about the future, sometimes to the degree that she cannot do anything. But she will never hurt you, and woe to the person who tries harming you."

"Just like you did for her?"

"Yes, _Liebchen?"_

"You went into the robot to protect my Mama," Ariel responds, "Didn't you?"

Kyoko nods.

"Yes," she says, "Yes I did. To protect her, and to protect everyone."

Ariel leans in, wrapping her arms around her. She kisses her on the cheek and backs away back to Asuka. Hand on her cheek, smiling, laughing, Kyoko stands and looks to Yui.

"I'm ready."

Yui nods. In a flash of light, she is gone. Clearing his vision, Shinji looks around, before rushing over to Asuka and Ariel.

"What happened?" he asks.

"It's time for me to go," Kyoko says, "I'm proud of you, _Liebchen._ Prouder than you could know. You have surpassed me in all ways. As a scientist, as a person, and as a mother. I am just happy this could end on this note."

The spotlight shines down, illuminating Kyoko.

"What are you doing?" Asuka whispers.

"This is a Trial," Kyoko responds, "And trials can be passed by one of two ways. By brute force and guile, or by accepting the terms. To let our sins be bared to the world and to accept them. And to be willing to take a final step. The Angels test if we are worthy, if we have progressed."

The light plays around her, the creases of her dress and the wrinkles of her eyes.

"It is the greatest test of sentience," she says, "If we are ready to move past mere sapience into true transcendence. And do you know what the greatest sign of sentience is, Asuka?"

"The willingness to sacrifice," Asuka answers, a tear sliding down her cheek.

Kyoko nods.

"We have passed the test," she says, "Passed the trial. You were willing to die for your daughter, and I am willing to die for you. Thank you, _Liebchen._ But it is time for me to move on."

With a burst of light, great white wings manifest from her shoulders. The song around them comes to a crescendo of voices and horn.

"Goodbye, Mama," Asuka says.

The smile on Kyoko's face goes from ear to ear. And her gaze turns to Shinji, locking eyes with him.

"And before I go," she says, "Ikari, if you ever hurt my daughter, I will come back _specifically for you."_

The light around her shines, flashing, consuming everything around them-

*

*

* * *

And they collapse. Shinji is on his feet first, pulling up Asuka and wrapping his arms around her, pulling Ariel into their embrace. Looking around, he sees his father nowhere to be found, and write it off before Asuka grabs him by the back of his head and kisses him. _Hard._

"W-what was that for," he laughs.

"Being my lifeline," she says with a smile, "And me being smart enough to grab it, this time."

*

*

* * *

"Angel is gone," a technician calls out, "Both of them are silent!"

Running a hand through her hair, Misato lets off a long overdue breath. Leaning against a chair, she looks at her cell phone as it beeps and brings it up to her ear.

"Shinji, if I was not so relieved to hear you, I would _kick your ass._ They're fine? Thank GOD…wait, _what_ about Unit 02? What do you _mean,_ it's dead?"

*

*

* * *

He stumbles into the office. Eyes wide, a sheen of sweat covering his face. He has seen _things_ he was never supposed to see, experienced the existence of things never meant to know. By luck, he managed to crawl away, Section 2 escorting him to his office before anyone was the wiser. Only the very epitome of self control kept him in check.

But he is alone now.

Face twisted in horror, Gendo Ikari braces his hands on his desk and screams. In terror, in pain, in regret. Every sin he committed plays before his eyes. Three billion dead souls from his part in Second Impact. The crimes of the Instrumentality of Man, the mental breaking of the Pilots, the attempted murder of the human race and his complacency in what his wife attempted for what she believed was the good of all.

Eyes hollow, breath ragged, he stumbles to his chair and collapses into it.

He blinks, once, twice. Reaching for a drawer, he pulls out a gun. Leveling the pistol at his temple, he cocks it and pulls the trigger.

_Click._

Again.

_Click._

Again.

_Click._

The gun shatters. He blinks, a trickle of blood flowing down his ear, before two pale hands hover on either side of his head. One exposed upon its palm an unblinking eye, the other a seven eyed mask. A blue tendril and a gold tendril flow into his ears, and his eyes glow in turn.

Blinking, he sits up straight, reaching into his desk and pulling out a spare pair of his amber glasses, taking the offered handkerchief and wiping down his face.

"Thank you, Rei," he says.

"Timing is everything," Rei Ayanami-Aida says with a small smile, "Your experience?"

"Jarring," Ikari responds, standing up, "But for reasons such as this, I tend to keep my gun unloaded."

"The last chamber of the gun was full."

He takes the remains of the gun, picks up the chamber, and looks at it.

"So it was," he says, and places it back in his drawer, "I apologize for having to call you back from your honeymoon, but we are reaching the final stage. We must now consult with our guest once more."

She nods. He stands, straightens his uniform jacket. And the two co-conspirators walk into the elevator, speeding down to their meeting with the waiting Zeruel.

*

*

* * *

In orbit, in another plane, the sentience of Leilel allows itself a moment of pride. The Lilim have passed one test. It chuckles, to itself. They are more than they assume themselves to be.

Now, it thinks, What else can they prove themselves again.

Reaching its awareness into other times and other universes, it wonders.

Ah, yes, it thinks.

That will do nicely.


End file.
